Breakingthewall

@NondualesStudium hah I misunderstood you sorry to be so ill thinker. My English is far to be good. I will see that video, and explore Jed McKenna, I never read him. thank you! Edit: Im looking for those books of McKenna, do you remember the titles where he talk about those concepts?

What do you mean? Are you familiar with terms like respect, or open minded? Maybe you should learn them. I exposed those experiences to help and to share. Of course I know that some people could ridicule them...that's life.

If you know how big are the balls that you need for that, you know a lot. I haven't that balls neither, but it's no choice. The deconstruction is calling you since you were 16, sure at the end you re going to accept

That is. It's hard to loose everything that you know

I would not try to avoid that fear but to go deeper, since it represents something real, and also the key to the spiritual journey, the death of the ego. It is not only terrifying but in some way sad, but being is wonder and also there is no possible choice.

More or less the same than me. I think it's real...for the ego. In my case it's not like I'm gonna dissapear, its like there is nothing already, but the meaning is the same. Is your terror as an ego facing the reality. You are going to totally dissapear , became a zero. I take it as an opportunity . In a level it's a madness, horrible. You want permanence. In another level...it's the reality. We, as an ego, are nothing, we are going to dissapear. The spiritual work is to dissapear right now. It's terrifying but must be done.

@RedLine could you explain the experience? I have had experiences that I think may be similar with psychedelics. infinite emptiness, total annihilation, and the certainty that this is so right now if you remove the veneer of ego. it's pure terror and I'm working to embrace it. I have also had the opposite experience: I am the only immortal being, absolute happiness, the one who is , also here and now under the fine veneer of the ego. one thing is wonder, the other is horror

@James123 same for you and for all the people of the forum Wonderful 2021

@allislove very interesting. Both experiences are inspiring

@allislove i agree with you, the root of all suffering is the belief that I'm separate identity. I wanted to say that it's very difficult to break that belief. When I realize what I am with psychedelic , when the ego is coming back, is telling: being, don't send me a sickness, let me keep my body without injury, don't send me to the misery. The ego is strong. I know what I am but same time a part of me want to keep my 2 legs for walking. Maybe coz I had life that make me to figth, the ego is stronger., now I want to let it go because I see very clear that the ego is a trap and what I am is...the joy that you was before you had 2 years old. The being. But even knowing that is difficult, but not impossible of course, psychedelic are a gift, but not only, you need auto observation all time to understand imo

The problem is that you must believe that you are a separate identity to survive. The abandon is difficult when the Lions are running against you. I think that's why to trascend the ego is a very difficult job

This has the same problem than reincarnation. Who goes to the hell? Must be the ego. But the ego is illusory, it's formed in this life, is like a clothing that cover the being. But maybe it have a permanence after death.

Those desires like presitge , etc derive from the basic need for survival. and also of reproduction. those are the roots, completely animal. The boy in the cave knows that without the acceptance of the tribe he s going to die , and the adult feels the strong call of reproduction. Death and life , its normal that is so difficult to stop the desire. You need to trascend the animal

Psychedelic , and with meditation some times

insight happens when the river stops running so fast it creates foam and waves. when it stops for a moment the water becomes transparent and you can see the bottom. right away it starts moving again and the vision fades

the root of desire is the need for survival. Ending the desire occurs only when you transcend the ego and a) you become aware that everything that happens is premeditated in some way and b) you see the possibility of giving your life possible. What I still can't see is where the motivation to act if there is no desire come from. I guess without desire there is no action.

dream, illusion, material world, are only words. when you have an experience where you acquire the point of view of consciousness, it seems that a thin curtain disappears, and that the world and your person are empty dreams and that only consciousness is real, but when you return to the individual's pov ,consciousness , the emptiness, remain only in the memory and this world is very real. So which one is real? I would say that there is no need to make that distinction. What is, is. calling it "just a thought" doesn't make sense. perceiving without naming is more practical

Yeah, when you can. What could be better? Let the life developing, you are privileged, you have a level of consciousness that very few have at your age. open up and let things be as they have to be

@Laila you are trapped in the ego, like almost everyone else, but your ego makes you suffer. The positive of this is that you are forced to transcend it. you know, self-observation, meditation, and psychedelics. Well, and a big dose of intelligence and intuition, think by yourself and don't follow anyone, and you can completely escape that trap

@Leo Nordin I think your doubts d be easily solved if you leave home, travel, and your money runs out. from there improvisation begins and life will guide you wherever it want. Before that, while the money lasts, enjoy it. I wouldn't worry a minute

I don't know nothing and I don't care about any concepts. I'm open , no more

It's wrong , the infinite is the void. Infinity and zero are the same. When you realized it there are not doubts. It's the most impressive realization , I shit in my pants (figuratively) when it happened. it's not a concept or anything learned. I read your trip with 10 grs of mushroom. When you talk about the nothing, that you are in the base of the reality and there is nothing, I had exactly that realization with 5 meo, but it's not all. Sorry for say but I think you should open your mind. Why do you say: I'm not interested in 5 meo because I already did 10 grs of mushroom, and it's the same or more? How do you know? Why you are absolutely sure that you reached the last truth? Look like you want to be stuck

Something fundamental in the spiritual path is surrender, let things happen, trust that everything will be as it should be. jump without a parachute. hands over control. you don't have it anyway. think: yes ok, that's fine, but in money matters such nonsense is not worth it, you have to be more serious ... well, money, health, life and death, the trapeze artist does his stunts without a net. that's the beauty of life

There is no path marked out for this, following the steps that someone dictates to you, I don't think it is of any use. acquiring complete mental independence is essential. as you say, it is a whole life that guides you to an outcome. you realize that every event in your life pointed to that destination. a destination that makes any other aspiration seem like a joke

If you want to explain, Im very interested, and sure others too