Breakingthewall

Talk about your "flaws" openly. remove the shame from your life. do it every day, don't hide. say what is not easy for you to accept from yourself. On the other hand, if people get very silly, tell them the most offensive thing you can think of, without any barriers, but not inventing, something that is true, but without anger, like a joke. It is as liberating as 5meo, or more. When you start, you can't stop!

@The0Self In the end, its structure, as it is built on nothing, begins to crumble, but the fixed patterns have strength and are capable of restructuring and functioning, what happens is that they are so unpleasant compared to being free of them, that they are not tolerate. I start to see the miracle: the disappearance of that shit, really

Logically it should be the same since if it were not lsd, it would not work, or it would be completely different, but there are many experienced users who say that it is not the same

That said, there are many masturbating looking in the mirror, putting on latex clothes, moaning, even doing stunts.

you can be negative or positive. negative, looking at the pretentious who only write to wank looking in the mirror, or positive, looking at the flashes of purity, goodness, really. in this forum, and in life

You don't remember anything before two years because your ego is minimal, very rudimentary. There is only being, and it is all the same, undifferentiated, so you cannot distinguish between an instant or a month. little by little your ego is forming and your memories are printed, your ego is formed. Your ego is not a nonsense that you will easily forget, it is a real energetic pattern, ways of processing that although they are not material exist, dissolving them requires talent, it is an art. minimize its reality, its importance, perpetuate it. If you think that one day you will realize that you are God and everything is a dream, and after that your ego will be deactivated, you are wrong. it has concrete foundations

That is true, but if you do not solve the causes of suffering, you will continue with it inside, always. You will notice it more or less, but there it will be. I am referring to the psychological suffering that in my opinion is the rejection of yourself. the solution is acceptance. If you accept yourself fully, completely, including suffering, it will lose its poison. you have to make an effort and accept, value, say, that part of you that hurts, ashamed you. there can be no distortion between what is and what should be, or you will have a permanent knot inside. Accepting the divinity of your suffering is the key, humiliating yourself in the sense of eliminating the idea that things should have been different. you are that, there is no more. there can't be more. It is not in your hands of you, as ego, to think how this and that should have been. As an ego it is only in your hands to be proud of your suffering, it is your distinctive as a human, do not hide it or make up, or you will be hiding yourself.

@flyingwhaleehave you ever tried analogs? I have 1cp lsd. there are those who say that the effect is very different, others that it is the same.

for the same reason that you dreamed of a bacteria swimming in your toilet

Yeah! Beautiful report, great luck to be able to do that with your father

99% of 30-year-olds don't have it either. on the contrary, they have been accumulating shit of all kinds and the chances of having a traumatic trip are greater. and if it is someone of 50, the risk multiplies. as he says, building a life based on truth and not survival is better than building a life based on survival and then deconstructing it. What can undermine your motivation to survive? I do not believe it.

It seems that Leo is not looking for happiness, he seeks to deepen. not to make a profit, but for the passion of an explorer. interesting to see where he goes

you say the trip triggered a process of bringing large amounts of trauma to the surface. Would you have preferred to live the rest of your life without that happening? I don't understand the negative part. we are alive, we must take risks, nothing has happened to you that will not have positive consequences

I think now i know what internal dialogue is. it is a simulation of conversation with another person, since the ego is the relative self. It is in relation to others. it cannot be alone. So when you are alone, pretend to talk to someone imaginary, to continue existing.

existence is. non-existence is not. since it is not, it cannot be perceived, so it is irrelevant. There may be abysses of non-existence between fleeting moments of existence, but as they are finite, since if it were not so, there would be no existence, for practical purposes there don't exist

your inability to wake up is because you are overwhelmed by "real" problems and trauma to solve. Life is long, those problems will eventually lose their venom and take the pressure off you from focusing on this. the time will come when everything flows naturally, all you are doing is a preparation for that

@impulse9 ram Dass was a criminal, giving 900 ug to a guy who has never tried psychedelics ... since he was a criminal, surely he is also a liar and is making up everything

I feel identified, a year ago meditating 10 minutes was an effort. Today, meditation is the best thing in my life. It has been thanks to 5meo, without that I would never have managed to break the first barriers, now it flows. far from the depth you're talking about but I see clearly where it leads: completely disassemble the entire fucking game, in a definitive way

great report, I had a good time reading it. the brilliant perfection of the present moment is perfect, right?

The meditation vs psychedelic debate doesn't make much sense here, when the op says that he has done psychedelics many times, in doses of breakthrough, with the intention of dissolving his ego, etc. If it hadn't been for the psychedelics, his meditation probably would have stayed on the surface. Btw great post

I think the matter is like this: right now I am sitting in a park, meditating. a beautiful place, I feel calm, joy, but there is a limit, an obstacle. it is always there. the obstacle is me. the obstacle disappears with chemistry, for a while, or at some specific moment if I meditate for several hours, although it soon returns. enlightenment would be living without that obstacle. It is something that I (the obstacle) would like. It's not simple at all, but i think it's possible

@Raptorsin7 I'm not enlightened either, I just imagine what it's like to be. total absence of the self, no preferences. the absence of the self leaves room for absolute joy. complete feeling of connection, no difference between you and what is not you. total absence of concern about yourself. no repression, total fluidity. but it is only speculation based on brief moments. I've never met anyone enlightened

Are there self-referential thoughts that provoke emotions when you are alone? When you meditate, do you realize the absence of limits? If this happens, does a serene, ineffable joy fill you? you are aware all the time that your entire field of perception and other people, is you?

because when the limitation disappears and reality is manifested as the undifferentiated infinity that it really is, there remains only being, infinite joy, love of the infinite towards itself. as this is reality, and torture is apparent manifestation of what it is, so torture is infinite love, we just don't see it that way because of our egoic programming. The real work, the liberation, is be able to see the love in what seems the opposite of love. something that very few of us will be able to achieve

You can do it alone but with someone you decrease the chances of getting into endless loops. what they say about age is relative. the maturity of some people or others differs abysmally. I took a strong dose at 18 being immature, and living in a very difficult and incomprehensible family situation that made me on the verge of an outbreak. 12 hours of nightmare, plus three days just integrating it, seeing how gears in my mind rectified, fitted together, changed the course of my life, made me mature in a week. I know it's not your case, you look mature, balanced, but since it helped me so much at that age, I can't say it's bad by definition. It's not the same 16 or 18, and, as you look stable, if i were you, I'd wait. Why the hurry? But if you really want to do, it's not so dangerous. a lot of 16-year-olds spend whole months on weed, which is much worse in my opinion