gettoefl

don't dissolve ego, transcend it if i listen there is two entities in my head right now, one is real, one is an automatic response system whose job it is to give me a good life let ego do ego and in fact i have no choice in that but i don't mistake it for me, it is no more me than you are i am its watcher its minder its overseer its awareness i know my identity and look to live it fully

they melt on the mat, everything comes up be it anger lust greed hatred jealousy ... it is all worked through seamlessly the you who gets up is radically different from the you who sits down

i say forget karma until later, do what you came here for which is wake up, i rise at 3am every morning to hit the mat and will continue until its kicks in full time truth implores i be ultra serious, i haven't a second to waste, my heart can stop beating any time it pleases i am a man in the desert who has wandered aimlessly and desperately many days searching for just one sip of water i have plenty of time to pursue everything else both during the day as well as later on impossible for me to sit on a mat 24 hours a day

@r0ckyreed this is pure vice like mind grip on display, you mind is selling you delusion and you are the willing purveyor you are the poster child of mental enslavement, advertising what the ego considers the well lived life the monk lifestyle is one, doing what you incarnated to do and two, living the bliss of awakening thereafter, namely living in the garden of eden without a care or a concern ... there is no better life imaginable but you have to be out of mind's incessant grandiosity to see this i lived with monks for a bit, the benedictines at the abbey in san diego county and every day is a magnificent adventure never knowing what is going to full into your lap meditation is simply abiding in your true nature, not letting the mind's storytelling run rampant and deceive you into thinking it matters realize your true nature, start to integrate it, then let's talk about the monastic life it is perfectly fine to enjoy the dream after awakening and it also perfectly fine to play with the birds and the animals in the garden of eden

attraction, attachment, addiction = love to have, have to have, sure to have addiction is turning a want to a need conversely all needs are addictions your day doesn't begin til the fix is in ... you make sure you get it no matter what the one difference is addictions can be dropped i don't see addictions as bad for myself, if i am addicted i will force myself to take breaks so i can see the effect i am or have been addicted to everything but i don't mind because i indulge consciously rather than absentmindedly i give myself permission to do whatever body wants but i stay in awareness as far as able and doing this addictions don't pull so hard i take away their power and go along for the ride and one day they decline to being an attachment or an attraction and so i can say yes or no

for me its who gets me the inner circle who get my inner sanctum, the holy of holies, the raw brutal unvarnished me it necessitates radical vulnerability i give all to those i have absolute trust in those who are able to get it those who will provide the mirror i need why? if you get it, you understanding, does facilitate the greater deepening honesty is what begets the deepening of truth most of course never get me no matter what honesty is reserved for the rare few

the whole internet needs a filter that adds the words FOR ME to every sentence every uttered on planet earth truth, thought, life, love ... is subjective for me at my level of consciousness all else is a puerile attempt to impose ideology on unsuspecting masses memo to god

time is the belief that things change of course a person seems to be born and seems to die so let's define that spectacle as 3 score and ten years and then presto we have created time

i bless you and love you too with your relentless uncompromising hard earned quest for truth ... you resonate with me more and more as time goes on and for me that means i am awakening ... thanks for being part of this place and sharing your treasures with me

some insights i stumbled upon this week desire, attachment, addiction = love to have. have to have, sure to have ... respectively desire is fine and natural and fun; desire everything, whatever comes enjoy to the hilt, just don't pray it stays attachment is i can't live without this, you have thereby expanded your identity and consequently your suffering addiction is this is an unstoppable behaviour and therefore my defining priority ... my life is fulfilling my addiction ... this is wholly who i am

thought is ego bossing me, word is me bossing ego thought is energy coming at me to entrench my wellbeing my satisfaction my survival word is me reprograming thought to enhance my thriving and my arriving thought is division, word is multiplication thought despises, word empathises thought is worthless, word is priceless thought keeps me asleep, words wake me up so writing anywhere can be useful

have to love a bit of brevity around here hah ... want to express my thanks all your epic sharing even though it gives my brain a major melt-down, will read until it sinks in ... i bless you ?

stage 4 i is zero, stage 5 infinity is i

i trained myself to integrate morning meditation so i no longer think about it, this is my third year of meditating i get up in a daze, do a little yoga, then plop down on the mat i do nothing and i have no idea about meditation, lately i have been counting breaths, 600 breaths=2.5hours flex muscles then 400breaths=1.5hours every day is completely different in what happens, most days feel shit some days feel cool, but i don't care it is not something to mull over i am reading pointing out the great way that @Water by the River mentioned, nearly finished and hardly understand a thing but i will read again i am not attached to meditation, if from tomorrow i never meditate again that's fine or if i take couple months off cool too meditation hasn't changed my life at all except i know my true nature and try to be that conduit of the absolute as best it allows

real is changeless

solipsism is i am the only person who has god in me and therefore i will be of optimal selfishness so i can live out my desires and dreams truth is all have god in them and therefore if they awaken to this, they will be of optimal selflessness and be completely indifferent to whether they live or die this very day, since they have done what they came to do namely awaken

let me tackle everything is imaginary the duality is imaginary, real look at a tree, is it real or imaginary imaginary why? it comes and goes, it is just like mist ... the fact it sticks around a while does not change its vaporous non-real nature the world and every-thing is imaginary so what? the real you can do nothing about, the imaginary you can kill mind ordinarily cannot see real it sees what is needed to survive, in fact it overlays an appearance on the real substance most of us are utterly blind this is why meditation is good you can kill the arising and passing and see the real

have to be ruthless about friends, selecting them and whether to keep them friendship is based on reciprocity and like-mindedness: - they have to give the same measure you give and you contact them in equal measure to them contacting you - they have to be similar in interests background and development, in order words easy to be around if they don't meet your requirements cut them 2-3 is the optimal number and ideally your friends are friends of each other

to survive is to madly feather your flimsy nest in the dream while to arrive is do what you came here for, see the dreamer as a mere view-point from where said dream emanates surrounded by transient fluff including a body mind which seemingly houses said view-point upon arrival, survival is de-emphasised in favor of enjoyment and sharing and love life is no more dog eating dog and now more god meeting god

attachment is a want becoming a need i got to have this else life is not worth living how to stop want becoming need? for example to meditate every day means attachment learn to go for periods of time without benefit from everything, attach to nothing

to suffer means to not permit suffering is refusing to let existence be the way it wants to be there are no negatives in existence, negatives are how minds label stuff everything in existence is good and besides it is silly for you or anyone to try to thwart existence's wishes even more so when you realize that you are existence on the other hand let others be, they are enjoying life according to their level of consciousness

prayer is self talk that motivates oneself to wake up namely getting serious

sure practice love but don't go round raping the unconsenting with your amazing enlightenment let anyone who is seeking come unto you the 99% want just to be left tf alone and haven't interest in your spirtitual diarrhea

have to contemplate what is lying it is maintaining two versions of reality, the real me and the manicured me we all do this, we wear sweats when no-one is looking, we put on our glad rags to go on a date lying is saying i deny you access to the real me and i shall keep you in this realm until i say otherwise or until you wise up we all do this but most will lie they do so as they don't know what lying means i mean who in their life has worn their sweats and not showered before a first date ... rhetorical question so now you understand this, learn to use lying judiciously, you have one shot in this god given bod final point, never admit that you are liar some truths are too painful for even the most self aware

this alone counts heed not outcomes play with passion win and lose don't give fucks keep on playing sweating stretching sparring give your totality then head home fall into bed tomorrow same again