Thought Art

You can't and you can destroy relationships doing so. Everything needs context and containers. Let people come to you, not you going to look to change others. Who the fuck are you to wake anyone up?

I like this. All this God talk is really a waste of time. Except too scaffold and orient a mind into openness and receptivity of experience. I think spirituality done right is rather mundane and ordinary. Sure, there are exciting mystical states etc which are amazing But, regular or human life is God too, you just didn't know.

@RMQualtrough I understand

Maybe it's the right counter intuitive move that my life purpose is music but I take accounting. I am 25, I have time and I keep practicing my music. I need to build a solid life foundation. Music and this dream career I have in mind I think is possible. I've seen the potential of what knocking on all the doors can do. I've gotten on some stages and that has been great. But, to take it to the next level is going to require a total overhaul in my skill set and mastery overall. I have a plan that can work. I just need to hone in, keep my focus and not self sabotage. That is a weakness, and I will weed out the weeds 1. I think accounting and developing my understanding of personal finances is crucial for artists and anyone looking to be successful in life 2. Doing tasks that require a high level of detail like my accounting assignments is so so so important to developing the attention to detail 3. The program is teaching me that reality doesn't give a shit if I am depressed or not. Reality will pass me by if I just sit on the side lines depressed and anxious running fears in my head about all the bad shit that could/ will happen to me if I pursue my life purpose. Reality isn't going to wait for my mental health to improve 4. Studying account shows me why my results have been so poor in life. Without a solid grasp of accounting and project planning you can't really develop and execute a solid life purpose imo because you are really playing this great balancing act and that requires skill, systems thinking and attention to detail. Once you are making financial decisions and having to follow government regulations things start getting really complex. Even if you are an artist these things are still important Maybe it's overkill, I don't know but I think it's the best thing for me right now given my circumstances.

I notice now I am a few months into my accounting program just how complicated reality is. Learning the deepest teachings, or watching videos etc is not enough. You need direct experience and 1000's of hours of it. I don't know if my life purpose is possible as I continue to see the way life works. But, know this. You only get out of life what you put in. I know my accounting knowledge isn't where I would like it to be despite all my studying. I admit accounting and math is not my passion or strength but I know it's an important business/ life skill. I kind of suck at attention to detail, so this is good practice for me. Go learn!

Luckily it's an 8 month program. I thought it would be a good basic skill that was really practical and foundational to developing the skills, discipline and attention to detail I will need to be successful in life. It is boring and tedious, but that is the point. I need the skills in these areas. I don't think people realize when they starting thinking about life purpose just how much they are getting themselves into. The skill set you need to be independent and powerful creator in the world I think requires a robust set of practical skills combined with the right mindset. It is deep. I don't know what the future holds for me. I am working to develop enough inner clarity, financial mastery and independence over the coming years. This is only going to come if I am really on top of myself. I need to basically incorporate my life. I sense that my art wont be paying the bills any time soon and that my life is worth more than life purpose in the end. I need to look out for myself, but with the long term intention of being able to serve others. I help others when I help myself. Maybe it was a foolish decision. It's painful, boring, I hate it. My artist mind explodes with anger, depression and fury at how dry and boring it all is. However, It's also beautiful and inspiring for my rational systems thinking mind which I deeply desire to develop. So, I will persist through it. It's useful and practical knowledge to understand how accounting works and payroll systems. In order to run my own business I need more and more exposure to the inner workings of business and I think finance because it's math and boring people shy away from it. However, I have a long term plan with it. I know I need that type of training that an accountant has. Working, using systems, boring, grinding type of work. But there is also the attention to detail, problem solving, systems, math, remembering of legislation etc... I think that is useful because whenever you are trying to create a business, project, event, etc you need to know how these things work and have experience working with them to be able to plan, make accurate projections and operating decisions. I find by studying accounting I am seeing how this part works. I want to be a high level strategic thinker. I can't do that without more knowledge and direct skills. Accounting is boring but also very very very revealing into what humans do and how record keeping works. It's really amazing. I am on a life long learning path. We will see what comes of it all. I felt a big change and maturation today. I ain't going to make millions of dollars not learning accounting right now I think if I am honest. It's useful. But, a pain in the ass I am not going to be an accountant in the long term. I need to develop the perfect toolbox for creating my life. I need more skills! So, I am getting them even if I am unsure and even if I do it imperfectly, or resist, or wine and complain. I am educating myself for fucks sakes ahaha.

Could be. My ego wants it's dream but, alas I am surviving as an animal on a rock in space. I can still create, but not in a God like manner I think as Leo says. Maybe some of you rich people can ahaha And ultimately only I can decide what God is, or the nature of God. I know it's love. But, I am still working on it. And, it is what it is regardless of what I think.

Rieki, Qigong, De-armouring, yoga, massage therapy, talk therapy, etc

I want children

Unless I need to study for my account exam lol

in the book the God molecule the author said the mushrooms told him to become a doctor and then he went and became one.

oh, I use the podcast app an it works fine

let it gooo

That is stupidity imo What a waste of consciousness

Yeah, but not in your experience.

Yes, I can acknowledge this. I've been in these states, but here in my ego I feel a lot of fear and anger with reality sometimes. A video game, except it's life and death and you have no idea what lay outside of this life. It's not really like a video game imo. Maybe it is, but life is sooooo long and brutal and absolute. and if God is infinite you theoretically could have a meaningful developer mode..

@Someone here But, you just typed that sentence. Not me. and if it's just me imagining things I wouldn't create this world. It's ego... sure. Reality is how it is. I don't really get it exactly. I feel petty so I will stay away lol!

It's a useless notion. I mean, its infinite but it's still pretty finite for the REST of our lives which is all we ever know.

This does not add up. If there is just me, then why roads? Why countries? Why jobs? Why schools? Why space? why time? Why other people? Why boring ass parking lots and stores? Nah, it aint just me. Just GOD which is me but not just me.. No, if reality was perfect it would be. That's it. I think reality is perfect, but my life has been full of suffering and loss. So, is god a sadistic kink? What is going on? But, then again I am imagining all these things right now.

This statement is clearly false. Not lack of desire. We both know the amount of variables in peoples lives. Talk to me in 10 years..

I've read "Trust God, but also ensured your horse is tied up correctly" I am really saying, Okay if you are infinitely creative you don't need to even allow ME, to be able to make poor decisions or etc. So God only forgives us because it created a reality with no one around to judge it that includes a lot of evil and suffering. It's not really forgiving. This doesn't fully add up for me yet, though I see what you mean in other states I've been in. God let me shit in the pool. Why? It's not really forgiving God just gets a get out of jail free card despite allowing all the suffering. Why create me with these thoughts, parents, experiences etc. I have more work to do.

I am ready to embody these truths. I find the embodiment of this challenging.

(: I am more than half way through my 200hr teacher training!

Leo Gura and Jordan Peterson on the carnivore diet! Very interesting you both suffer from a similar gut condition.

It depends if you want to also have a dream career you are working toward.