Raptorsin7

@Martin123 Do you feel you may be over sensitive to criticism with this approach? Way to act in accordance with your own beliefs though man. Much respect.

@Jo96 30 minutes twice per day sounds pretty solid. What other practices are you doing? How far along the path would you consider yourself?

I have a head ache. There is suffering caused by pain in the head. I want to get better, and not suffer the head ache anymore. Compassion is the answer to judgment. I am awake. How to feel really good? Meditation is the way. Let's do 20 minutes and come back.

I am going to be challenger in league of legends I am going to run a multi million dollar website I am enlightened I know who I am I am aware I am forgetting who I am lol I am in the zone I found myself

@Roy Very cool thank you man. I was masters Terran in SC2. I remember i would come home from school at lunch and play a ranked game. My heart would be beating like crazy, and my hands would shake during the game lmao. There's no doubt the second one. Joy, love, and happiness are the keys to being good at anything. It's all about self expression.

I'm having trouble performing in a video game i'm trying to master. I am anxous, worried, angry, over competitive when I play because this is how i've always played sports and games. I now realize that to be the best I can possibly be, i need to find the zone/flow state, which is actually just myself. Flow states occur when we are just being our selves, MYSELF=that which is aware of experience. So I want to play as MYSELF, or me, but i get lost in thinking/toxic habits when playing. Any tips on how to access myself or the zone more consistently when I play?

I am going to be challenger in league of legends I am going to run a multi million dollar website I am enlightened I know who I am I am aware I am forgetting who I am lol How do I find the zone in league of legends. Answer: Just be yourself while playing. Just be you. Prayer makes sense. We honor ourselves with prayer. Pray to god=yourself=that which is aware of experience.

Custom Yoga. Pushups, downward dog, and other random poses seems good. I can't dogmatic yoga anymore, I want to innovate. I want to do things a new way. Is this narcissim, to want to do them my way? I think so, but i don't mind the labels, i want to have the healthiest possible version of every aspect of humanity. And this is achieved by not trying to be anything other than yourself. Just be yourself. There is a connection with music. Who is the person typing this? Who ami? What is this? Hey, can you hear me? Yeah. Multiple personalities? Wow this stuff can get deep. Questioning who i am is very important. But it seems like there's a fine line before I descend into madness, if i'm not already there haha. Who am i? Who am i? I know who I am now. I am that which is aware of experience.

I'd peg Sam at yellow and Joseph at Turquoise.

I am procrastinating. I want to do yoga, my own unique type not the dogma that they practice at my yoga studio, and I want to clean my apartment. Meditation prior to to reconnect with source/myself/intuition/feeling seems like a good move when i recognize that i'm procrastinating.

@Consilience That which is prior to the thoughts of self has nothing to do but seek deeper within itself.

Crying is good. I love crying. I am so excited to start crying all the time. I want me some crying haha.

@wk197 @Nahm How important is the actual board in the center of the living space? I had a giant board in the center so i am biased in that favor. I will get you a board if you have no financial way of getting one, and @Nahm think it's vital. The board is critical imo. The bravery to express our wants without fear and shame is everything.

What's next in the day: Clean Yoga Moot Assignment Prep Video games There is still procrastination. But this is just resistance. Resistance to what is. The resistance is in thinking, in feeling, etc. RESISTANCE can be beat. It can be overcome. One battle at a time. No black and white. If i lose today i will try again tmrw. If i lose for the next 10 years then i will try again in the 11th year. It will all be okay. Don't worry, you will be okay.

Attachment creates suffering? How to liberate from attachment? Thoughts: I want to go to yoga today I do not have to go to yoga, but i want to go to yoga Yoga is fun. I insulted my yoga teacher by asking him about his spiritual practices. I am sorry, and I should not have judged him. He is a good person, who is trying his best to find god. I respect him. I have not gone to yoga in a while, but it's okay. If someone asks me where i've been, I will just say i've been slacking and i've been lazy which is true. I want to be better with my practices. There is no NEED or MUST with the practices. But i want to do them because they make me feel better and make me happier. I am going to yoga tonight, and I will have fun. I'm excited for yoga Thoughts about my assignment: The Moot Court Feeling: Anxious. Why am i anxious? Because i'm afraid i won't be prepared and I will look stupid. What if i get nervous, what if i stutter, what if I look stupid? All of these are honest concerns. But it's okay. I will do my best. I will prepare over the next 3 days. I will read the relevant instructions, i will read my own arguments, and the arguments of opposing counsel and I will do my best in the presentation. That's all i CAN do. I can only do what I can do. I can do my best. I can read the relevant instructions. I can read my arguments. I can read the other arguments. I can think of how i'm going to phrase my argument. But that's it. Whatever happens, happens. There is no reason to be worried about it because it's all going to be okay. No matter what happens at the moot court I will be just fine. There is no reason to worry. I am going to spend some time today working on my moot court assignment. I do not HAVE to do the assignment, if I REALLY wanted to i could just drop out of law school and never show up again. But it's okay. I want to do it. I want to live in Victoria. I want to stay in school for now. It will be a fun experience. I will learn a lot from moot court and I will enjoy the experience. I am very excited. Thoughts about people and their bath room habits. I have shame around using the bathroom and other people using the bathroom. There's something about farting and taking a shit that bothers me haha. All thoughts are dualistic. So, I have no problem with bathroom habits. Bathroom habits are not an issue for me.There is nothing that bothers me about farting and taking a shit. What am I feeling? I feel connected to my third eye, it is cracking and pulsing. Right now i'm bored. I'm just sitting here, I know i want more out of life but i'm just bored. Seems like meditation could be a good solution for what i'm going through in this moment. The near future looks like this. I am a telepath LOL. I am going to meditate, i'm going to shave, i'm going to shower and brush my teeth, then i'm going to grab coffee and go for a walk. There is resistance to going for a walk. I'm afraid of being judged for walking and getting coffee. Wow this is foolish when i write it out. Why would someone judge me for just wanting to get coffee and go to a part bench to relax? That judgement makes 0 sense. It does not feel good to think about being judged grabbing coffee and going to a part. I wonder what is CAUSING the bad feeling. Is it that giong to get coffee and going to a park bench is BAD, and therefore doesn't feel good. That doesn't make sense. Maybe the feeling is telling me that the thoughts about judgement aren't true and make no sense, so that what's feels bad. The truth is walking to the park and getting coffee is very nice. I am very fortunate to even be in a situation where i'm able to just be free to get coffee. I live in a beautiful city, it's a beautiful day. There is no reason for the negativity. Judgement doesn't make any sense. I do not like judging. I do not like casting judgement. I want people to be happy and free. I want to do my best to facilitate this. This is best done acting good. Doing good, leads to feeling good, which leads to doing good, which then leads to more feeling good, and the better I feel the more good I do. Thoughts of worry about what else i'm going to do just arose. The thread here is worry about my assignment. I want to plan time today to just work on my assignment so i can do something active to alleviate the worry. I do not want to bypass the worry. I want to address the substance, because i have RESPONSE- Ability. I have response-ability. I have the ability to respond and make choices and decisions. I do want to overwhelm myself, i want to enjoy the day. So how about i read the instructions, i read my arguments, i read opposing counsel's arguments, and I take some time to reflect on what needs to be done on saturday and sunday. That seems like it's productive. A thought arose I don't know who I am. But that's not true. I know who I am. I am that which is aware of this typing. I am conscious. I am awareness. I am aware. Awareness is aware. Procrastination. There is stuff to do. But there is resistance to the DOING. Wow. I am face to face with procrastination. 1v1. This it, the big battle. Who will win. I got this one.

What is True? I do not feel good. How do I know this is true? Well, right now i'm feeling. Well there is no I am, but there is just feeling. So the statement I do not feel good makes no sense because the I just a thought and it can't feel. I am over looking the present moment. There is a compulsive over looking of the present moment. There is no thinker. There is no doer. There is no person, per se. These are just stories, being created and recycled in thinking. The truth is right here, right now. The truth of existence. The truth that there is an experience. but everything else is just belief layered on top of existence. The biggest issue right now is seeking. Seeking a better state, paradoxically, is preventing access to a better state. Accept it. This is it. This moment. This feeling. Whatever this is. This is it. It's all right here. Accept it. Or suffer.

I am starting an online dream board to fill up because I can write more wants on here then my physical dream board

Wealth Millions of dollars Home in Northern California Home outside of Vancouver Complete financial freedom Feeling Peaceful Blissful Happy Joyful Hopeful Unlimited Free Content League of legends Outcome independent Consistent @Nahm @zeroISinfinity Is there a problem using I am, or I have? I'm confused about the I thought. I know it's illusory, and it's just refers to THIS, whatever this consciuos experience is. But is there a problem in using it with the dream board? I'm having a problem generating much feeling with my wants, like i feel content when writing what i wrote above but none of it really makes me feel really good or anything.

I am loving I am kind I am humble I am compassionate I am a healthy competitor I enjoy playing just playing's sake I am not effected by wins or losses I am not attached to the outcome of the game I am free I have excellent mechanical skill as an adc I have excellent map awareness I have excellent game sense I am calm I am relaxed I am at peace I am happy I am self actualized I am enlightened I am awakened I know who I am I feel joy I feel grateful I feel appreciation I am in the zone when I play league of legends I am completely locked in when I play league of legends All my chakras are opened I am fully realized I am open I am honest I am blissful I feel content Content Hopeful Relaxed Peaceful

@zeroISinfinity I love you too buddy you are a good person. Yeah league can be addictive but it can also be really fun, I want to find joy in playing

@zeroISinfinity

Let's see if i can find god in real time. I'll keep track of this attempt on this page of my journal. What's the plan? I'm listening to the song below, and i'm just sitting here THINKING about how to feel good. This is the problem. The attempt to use THINKING to FEEL better is backwards. Thought must be chosen based on how it FEELS. I'm running into a major problem here @Nahm. I don't know what thought to choose when I become aware of MYSELF, and realize that I can choose a thought. I kinda just freeze and go back into automatic thinking habits that don't feel good. Like i just tried to say in thinking, I love myself, i CHOSE this thought but i got no feeling out of it? Am i just emotionally numb and disconnected? I just had thoughts about Dariush and then i had thoughts about me bothering zero's journal lol. I feel hesitant to write some thoughts on here. Fear, shame, guilt, seems to be the driver there. Wow i just got lost in a thought lol. Wow it happened real time. I fking made a snarky spiritual ego to some dude omg lol. Wow. Okay i'm back. I'm conscoius again wow. I am conscious. I am conscious. I am aware of reality as it's happening wow. This is pretty cool, there's an experience going on and i'm just watching the experience. But who's watching? I tried to just be, and feel and it was good i felt good progress. But it's kinda overwhelming. I have trouble keeping it up, and now I need to rest. Wow i am conscious very cool. Conscoiusness seems very valuable. This is way better than anything we have in the world. The fact that I exist and am able to have an experience is amazing, what a dream this is. SUCCESS. Just be. Say yes to the NOW. There is a warm loving feeling when you just be. I am waiting for my third eye open. I want it to open. I am attached to the idea of my third eye opening because I think it will lead to good feeling. Attachment is what creates suffering. Attachment to thinking/beliefs. Detach from thinking and connect with feeling. Connect with being, Human-being, and feel. Feeling is what we want. We want to feel. Because our nature is feeling, feeling is who we are.

I see a lot of confusion with intellectuals who aren't smart enough to realize they are really spiritual seekers, and end up over depending on their intellect to the detriment of their own well being.

@PlayTheGame A bad LSD trip changed the trajectory of my life. It was pretty miserable, i was basically woken up to the fact that my life is terrible and I was really unhappy, and I wasn't really sure how to improve it. I wouldn't trade that bad trip for anything in the world. If i never had the bad trip I would never have had an awakening, it was necessary to my path.

@Red-White-Light Go find yourself before you start arguing with people. You look pathetic in that argument. Your argument style is gross.