AlphaAbundance

@Leo Gura That resonates deeply. Now I just need to find the next step to making that ideality ---> reality. @Hello from Russia Yeah, I'll be the first to say I'm a lazy fuck. I'm smart asf though, that's why I've been able to last so long with zero work ethic. I'm already so used to being financially dependent and hitting necessary thresholds in school. Having to financially support myself and work harder in college and jobs? Yeahh that's a tough sell. I don't want to be working at all although maybe I should look into what other jobs I can pursue. Like gun to my head what jobs would I pick and pursue. I blame spirituality myself for allowing spirituality to zap away all my stage orange motivation. Before this it was like I ma be out here, making money and ya know But don't think I'm just messing around. I've been slaving away on track to a good cushy tech job this fall semester as well as in the summer semester. Its just not worth it. I slave away now so that I can slave away later in a job till I die? Hell nah. Its financial freedom or a sufficiently passionate career or its a wrap. What is the solution? Also, what is the solution to the suffering of effort? What is the solution to sufferable effort? (This is the hard problem of effort) How do I make everything effortless?

@No Self Ok, I see, thank you. Also, I do have a sort of purpose, idea of a purpose, and some goals but they aren't really profitable. Basically understanding, consciousness, development, Maslow needs, etc. For financial freedom, I would likely pursue dropshipping, without these starter online businesses it seems like financial freedom would be near impossible. I kind of felt unmotivated thinking it is unconscious bullshit and selling crap to others that people don't need. It might still do it anyway and try to make it as conscious, non-harmful as possible. Ok, I see. I understand the thinking, beliefs surrounding a situation causing emotions. However, I think effort and doing college work, doing work in general is more akin to a direct physical feeling/sensation. I don't think much reframing or different perspectives could help it, possibly higher states of consciousness where even getting stabbed is pleasant could help. What do you think? However, I could be wrong. I do think future fear of effort has to be rooted in beliefs and thoughts about the situation. Maybe I can go deeper Do you think the only way or the main way I stop feeling suffering when doing effort, having to work is through enlightenment, increasing my stage of consciousness?

@Preety_India No I will create a life that is acceptable. How do you know no other realities exist? Lmaoo I will let you know when I access them Ok I will investigate these tips. I appreciate the response I hate college, even if there are some parts I enjoy I think its a load of bullshit that will only lead to more bullshit and dull, uninteresting, dreadful work in the future, its like 2% gold and 200% shit But video games are harmful, Fortnite was the main thing getting me through the bullshit of this school work but then I stopped that cause it was bullshit aswell - Do you have some suggestions for fun activities? What do you do for fun? Ok got it Lol you mean being rich Ill try Emotional support = codependence, lol fuck that, all I need is my journal and the occasional actualized.org post I'm not rich, I'm in college Ok got it Ok this is important, I need to work on this I think Yeah I love doing nothing, just laying at home, I don't want to go through the effort of restructuring some of interests to make money. As of right now my main and only interests are understanding, development, consciousness, maslow needs, and some others. How can I make money providing zero value to others Ok got it, this sounds important Ok what are some ways to enjoy life? I'm assuming you mean like pleasure? What do you mean? Isn't this sort of enjoyment dumb and useless? Why not just focus entirely on consciousness and development

Yeah, it might be probably is. It feels negative, saddening, dreadful thinking of having to work, thinking of having to do more fucking work next week or I lose my scholarship, go work at pizza hut, and end it all. Yeah, he may be right. Though I don't know if it's a matter of perspective, I sure hope so. I don't know if all the positive thinking and reframing in the world could eliminate the literal suffering of exerting themselves whether mentally or physically. Can one reframe the straining of doing math problems mentally? Can one reframe the exertion of running? Can one reframe the pain of getting stabbed? Can one reframe the deliciousness of a chipotle burrito? It may have some thought-based components but I think effort is a physical or mental like sensation, not really a thought, its an experience. The physical components are definitely an experience. I do hope I am wrong though because that means it's able to be reframed, etc. Unless you mean having higher stages of consciousness, realizing no free will, or some other radical type of stuff? I do see how these beliefs, thoughts lead to emotions of dread, negativity, etc. It really does seem to be the case though, actually be true. This might help, thank you. I will try examining and letting go / dropping these beliefs. 1. Living could be considered hard due to the fact that everyone has to work to live. I have to work to live Living seems to be not hard when their is enjoyment, neutral-range level or slight-mild suffering experience, including experiences of enjoyable effort. I can try to finish, be as efficient as possible in completing sufferable effort Their aren't usually shortcuts but I can try to work toward financial freedom instead of late retirement which would be the greatest shortcut. Yes I only want to do easy things. I might consider "working" for long periods on a project or something I am interested in as "easy" rather than hard. But also I hate all hard things. I only want easiness, easy things in my life, anything I find hard is likely something that I am uninterested in. I find watching leo's videos "easy" even though it can be considered hard. I find playing chess "easy" even though it can be considered hard. I find grinding out hours on a computer science project "hard", pointless and stupid. I find working on physics homework to be stupid and dumb and sufferable effort. 2. Because I feel confused and lost. I don't know what to do I hate school. I hate college. I hate having to work. I hate having to grind. I hate doing anything I don't want to do. I have been doing it for years and I am starting to think death will be a better fate. Maybe I am just lazy, maybe I am entitled but that is how it is. Nothing. I fucking hate school, college, work. No I can't make them enjoyable without some severe mental hoops for a little big of enjoyment (like trying to force the meaning of learning about the universe for its own sake, wait that actually might have inspired a little motivation) Confusion, Uncertainty, Lack of meaning / Nihilism, Lack of understanding of meaning, Indecision on whether I should move forward with enlightenment Nothing except whatever I assign meaning to make it so 3. Maybe, it doesn't come naturally, probably cannot, I can try alot of mental gymnastics and mental hoops but probably not, I could accept it and feel the state but in the end I still have to exert put effort in, its like I can feel the state, accept the state but after that I got to put effort in. I'm probably not making sense, it would take longer to articulate fully. I am checking, trying to make sure I am not being pessimistic, a downer in these replies, trying to check that I am not being pessimistic just to deny and whine and bitch and moan Yes but that's just wage slavery, in that case everyone should just do anything. In that case anything can be justified, anything can be done just because of the end result. People don't have to enjoy something just because of the end result. However this might be a good coping mechanism The point of the work I do is to simply survive. Just to satisfy basic needs, physiological + safety needs, anything else is mute or something I would naturally feel inclined to do, naturally feel interested or some motivation in doing Possibly, just surviving isn't that meaningful, anyway meaning is an illusion, a creation of the mind, meaning itself is pointless, couldn't I just make a meaning out of staring at the wall for the rest of my life Meaning is a construct, a belief that if the verification is satisfied, your mind allows you to feel some sort of positive emotion, its a mind-game, its bullshit No, but what is meaningful work? Meaningful work is bullshit, just do whatever comes naturally. I think I need to understand meaning greater, journal, contemplate on meaning some more No fruits of my effort except survival which isn't that great because all I have left is more survival No, I don't have some goal of life, I'm just existing The answer to almost all of these questions is I don't know, Im just speculating There is no reason to enjoyment, it seems that these are just pure ends to themselves, pure intrinsic motivations 4. No, everything else is bullshit. Become financially free, which is a whole level of grinding itself 5. I'm however I want to see haha, there are multiple perspectives here There is no meaning, meaning is bullshit, meaning is a smokescreen, meaning is an illusion ? What is meaning? More research and contemplation needed, there is no cause to fight for, its all bullshit, subjective and "pointless" See these questions felt some sorts of effort but they also felt interesting so it wasn't suffering per say. It did help somewhat. I will come back to these questions and contemplate/journal/ponder them. I have some questions for you What is meaning to you? What the fuck is the meaning? What is all this meaning you keep talking about? Also thank you for your response and intentions. Thank you for helping another Aquarius out.

@Preety_India Yeah sounds like a pretty shitty deal. I'm sure there is some other realities in absolute infinity that have effortless excellent living. Doesn't it make you want to just reset? @Leo Gura Lmaoo @DreamScape How is it an ideology? Why root yourself in body and life? What is meant by escaping? (Like killing yourself?) Who will get hurt when I escape? Wouldn't that mean I am dead? And my ego is evaporated into infinity? @Hello from Russia Здравствуйте, I'm from the USA

@No Self Appreciate your response. What would this higher perspective be? Being™? Enlightenment®? Flowing with the present moment? I guess that's always the solution to everything haha. Ok so focusing on the most affordable housing and paying down debts is key, When I am financially free (If this is in my future) I would just do whatever I want. That would probably eventually lead to and allow more time for life purpose, altruism, consciousness work, personal development, and other endeavors. Could you elaborate on what mental issues? What do you mean by that? (Like feeling bored, lack of purpose, lack of feeling "productive"?) Yeah, but it might not be this world. Maybe I will be able to reincarnate into a paradise? (Or maybe it will be a hell? ) Holy shit this is a gamble. However, I'm not too concerned about this. Yeah, I've heard about how life's "purpose" may be about raising your consciousness, developing to the point where you transcend this life, all carnate existence, and move up to the next form of life. However even this would be impermanent, wouldn't it? (Just food for thought) Ok so potentially live in other countries but most importantly focus on dis-identifying with the mind. That is probably true, one of the solutions to this. However, it does seem that because I am disidentifying more that I am losing the drive for survival. It seems that this is leading me to suffer from the mundane, dull, uninteresting effort of working (and for now college work) to survive. How would higher levels of consciousness help with this in particular? How would higher consciousness help with the feeling of suffering when exerting myself physically and mentally? (I think this might be something that isn't really connected with emotions just like how getting stabbed is just a direct bodily response)

What does science "get right"? In what manner was/is science a step in the right direction? What set does science belong to? What are the alternatives to science? (What elements, alternatives are in the set that contains science? ) What is the subset of science? How can science be sliced and diced? How can science be "transcended"? What is next after science? (What is it's connection to spiral dynamics, 9 stages of ego development, etc.) How did science arise? What is science? (Possibly include a deep understanding, breakdown of science as a foundation to talk about its deconstruction) But Leo without science you can be led into nonsense, new age delusion But Leo, you just want people to be susceptible to bullshit and new age ideas But Leo you want people to just believe everything, we would never get anything done, science is a matter of efficiency But Leo you have no proof of anything otherwise, what else is there? But Leo show me the double-blind placebo study But Leo let the qualified scientist handle talks about science But Leo smart people, high IQ people follow science, new agers and other charlatans don't But Leo are you saying you are smarter than Neil DeGrasse Tyson and Stephen Hawking But Leo science is reality, it's not a belief or ideology, it just is reality But Leo are you telling me gravity, energy, forces don't exist, when they are clearly shown, what exactly are you trying to say But Leo you got it all wrong, science is direct experience, it literally is empiricism But Leo, yeah it might have some problems but science is the best we can do, its the best, peak of human knowledge But Leo, anytime multiple people talk about their subjective experiences, it turns into science But Leo science is cross-referenced and based on empirical facts, its the best possible But Leo, there is no solution to the problems you speak of, we're just going to have to deal with it But Leo science deals with what can be proven, objectively shown, anything else is bullshit But Leo you got it all wrong, science is more objective, closer to the truth due to it summing up the subjective experiences of all observers, like an all-encompassing conglomerate getting to the real truth of the matter, it works as an average Fringe cases like enlightenment and paranormal should be ignored But Leo materialism works, it is tenable model of reality, anything else is impractical and speculative But Leo, materialism vs. non-materialism, it doesn't matter, who cares? Its the same results But Leo we can't deal with questions dealing with speculation and wishy washy stuff, leave that to philosophy But Leo, all this metaphysics and philosophy and other bullshit is impractical and helps your life in no way But Leo, facts don't care about your feelings

What have you learned from your research on this?

No emotions are good or bad. You don't feel negative based on life decisions but thoughts, perceptions and evaluations of those decisions. Analyze and become mindful of the thoughts and evaluations that are creating these emotions you feel. Please watch the following

Yeah I still don't understand this truth fully so I just choose to ignore it until I am ready. I also want to keep this "I", the ego who is writing this intact, for now atleast.

Eliminate distractions (block websites, delete/block social media, etc.) Reinforce vision/commitment (Ask yourself which will provide more net/overall joy, happiness, fulfillment, value in your life? Getting sidetracked doing whatever or continuing your research?). Have a clear understanding, vision, motivation (not the fluffy feeling but the big why) on why you are doing personal development research.

I'm not sure. If clear, direct communication doesn't work then you might want to get law enforcement involved or ask the police what you should do. You could even let them know with one last warning that you will call the police, contact law enforcement if it happens again, although depending on their pyschological stability it may be risky. However, if they aren't psychologically stable then you probably want to contact law enforcement anyway, maybe even before you let them know. Also be careful, you must be prepared to defend yourself and escape if you think there is any chance they may try to harm you or your family. Also, your post was difficult to understand, long and formatted poorly. If you want more people to respond, make it simple, clear, concise and formatted with spaces In between separate ideas and paragraphs.

Wow ?? It's probably unique to you (or people in your situation) and / or related to your state lately. Have their recently been changes in expansion of consciousness (for you)?

@Zak What thoughts are occuring surrounding, before, during or after this emotion?

This brings to mind progressive muscle relaxation

What the fuck The idea of this possibility just shattered my paradigm. Heard from @Arzack please elaborate

@Petals @Meta-Man Thank you!!! @Javfly33 You mean that no one is feeling suffering if I stab my mother in the other room (lmao I dont have mental issues - just hypothetical) @Nahm You mean that there is no "entity" or "me" that is aware of a body? Or that the idea of a "body" is just a concept?

It feels saddening and negative thinking everything is meaningless. It feels uninterested to do anything in life with me understanding (or perhaps thinking) it is meaningless. For example, with watching TV, it feels uninterested in anything that is happening. With playing video games, it feels bored thinking there is no real meaning, purpose behind playing the game. With drawing, it feels uninteresting thinking what is the actual point, thinking there is no absolute, objective purpose. And with altruism, it feels bored thinking there is certainly no point to actually helping others. It seems (or is the case that) all meaning is mentally created and therefore not objective. And created meaning is "meaningless" and arbitrary. Life has just dropped to survival needs and pure hedonism. Any resources or really anything I can do to fix this problem. I should have asked on here months ago. It feels saddening thinking there is no reason to anything. I also can kinda see that there is nothing bad or negative about there being no meaning in life - it just still feels saddening thinking that the enjoyment or fulfillment or "feeling of meaning" is gone and won't come back. The illusion has been shattered. It is kinda a feeling negative thinking that "ohh life is meaningless" but its also feeling saddening thinking "meaning is gone = I have less enjoyment of life" (which may or may not be the same thing). Its still feeling negative based on a scenario of meaning being gone and of there being less joy in my life. My only goals now are just seeking financial freedom (so I can avoid the suffering of having to work), enlightenment (bliss, true happiness and understanding of life so I can know what is best, what to do, how to solve this and all my problems) and becoming a super powered being (lol don't ask). How to cure nihilism based suffering? And on a side note, is joy (like the pure pleasure of eating ice cream) connected to meaning in anyway? Someone please just explain meaning. What is meaning? (And yes I already watched Leo's video - that is what seeded this. Also just be straight up no bullshit or sugarcoating)

Everytime I have a goal I feel unsure, confused, doubtful about it for example when seeking financial independence, sexual abundance or any other goal I often think or have the objection "Well isn't enlightenment the only worthwhile goal, thinking isn't all this other stuff meaningless, pointless and enlightenment is the highest goal" "Well what's the point of doing it now when I can work on it later?" I have consistently dropped out of my any habits or goals I have after confusions, doubts that I am wasting my time or not on the best path or right path. How do I deal with doubt when having goals. I know often these doubts can be used as self-delusion to drop out of hard goals. How do you deal with doubts, confusion when pursuing goals? How do you find clarity on what you want, what to pursue and know your on the right path? Also why not just seek enlightenment immediately and forget everything else even finances?

@JakeyAwakey Appreciate that man

^^^

@Epikur Ok got it - but doesn't Maslow's hierachy have some mentally constructed meanings (becoming the best, esteem, the great self-actualization - even if they are influenced by genetics or human nature). I might have already transcended those. I know my sex drive is currently practically zero (already deleted the meanings of wanting to be alpha, important because I fuck girls, etc - although this might be cause quarantine). Is the idea of "play" like in computer games or sports, more like you allow these meanings to exist so that you can enjoy them? The meaning you assign to hobbies is why you enjoy them? How do I start assigning meanings to make myself think hobbies and other shit is actually (and objectively) important? And basically is what I am pursuing enjoyment (or play) through the tool of meaning? Just pursuing and assigning meanings for the sake of enjoying them?

This is a thought / belief and its false as you found a way to get equipment and frankly there is plenty to do. Nah your thoughts and beliefs about the borders closing are impacting you emotionally. Scenario --> Perception & Thoughts ---> Emotions. "Wasting your life away" isn't a feeling - it is a perspective and thought. Obviously the facts are you have limited funds and your equipment is in Vietnam but you "wasting my life away" is a thought. The question is are you going to choose to see it that way? Is this an opportunity to prove to yourself you have what it takes to become a musician or an opportunity to give up? Figure out what are the exact thoughts causing your emotions? Like STE style (Scenario - Thought / Perception - Emotion). It seems like your problems are I can't pursue music I lost my income I don't know what to do It may be that the path moving forward is acceptance and improvement. It might be to try to let go of the emotions that arised based on the assigned meanings and endeavors you would like to pursue in your life. Just like the mini - you gotta find a way to either get to Vietnam (I don't know if this is safe so don't quote me) or get money for new equipment. Also this situation is hard but these type of situations are exactly the strenous hurdles that will arise in your path to become a singer & composer. So you gotta ask yourself - are you going to rise to the occasion or bitch & moan?

@Joshi3 Ok interesting. I feel negative thinking I am and will have reduced joy from lack of meaning. I feel negative thinking that there is nothing to do, everything is for nothing since there is no meaning. It is more like I am suffering from the lack of meaning reducing my joy. So it might be from my drive for enjoyment. Its feeling saddening thinking I lost the meaning. I understand what you are saying but its hard to escape it. I will keep trying. Please help though. What should anyone do if there is no meaning (or absence of meaning)? How does one create meaning?

Yes the distinction between caring and worrying about it is important. More concisely I would say it is considering how other opinions affect your life vs feeling emotionally attached to others approval and disapproval. If its caring what certain people think isn't causing any suffering or reducing joy then why stop doing it? Is it because you think it is wrong to care about what other's think? Would you care to elaborate more on your situation? Like who are the specific people? Maybe a little more understanding to the thought process that causes these emotions and you wanting to stop caring?