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About Leonid

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  1. Hello Liris, I also have had a strong social anxiety, inferiority complex, shyness and all that. But now I'm constantly putting myself out there, being social, meeting people, going to different events and so on, and it's becoming better. But it takes a lot of courage and fearlessness on my side, especially considering I don't drink alcohol. But I really wish you luck, I think you can visit way more social events in Finland than I am in Russia ( not moscow)
  2. @ElvisN Yeah thanks for the advice. Although cannabis with lsd is associated with high chance of bad trip
  3. @OctagonOctopus that's a good point. I mean, I've kinda tried to do it when I was reading Thomas Campbell's 'My big TOE', but it went well over my head unfortunately. I think I'm ready for the experience, cause I mean, you either develop your consciousness or you stagnate. I don't want to be stuck on that level as I intuitively feel there is just SO much more. Been interested in this stuff from age 8-9 I believe.
  4. @OctagonOctopus oh thanks bro, yeah I mean, but there is this stigma about non-duality, being sober we cannot really ever accept even the idea that we are not our body. It almost feels like wishy-washy thinking from ego perspective, and that's what scared the shit out of me when I experienced it for the first time, because I just could not accept the idea that I'm every person I see, and every non-living object I see, so radical of idea it is. Takes enormous open-mindedness. Thanks for reply tho, I thought about analysing my belief system, but IMO to really see through it takes a lot of awareness
  5. Hello everyone! I have 170 ug of LSD, and a couple weeks ahead of the next trip. Backstory - I tried half of that couple days before, and was able to almost sustain that blissful and aware state that LSD provides, by meditating 40+ minutes a day. I have had a non-dual experience when sober, and am now able to sustain thought-free state almost 50% of the day. I would say I'm in 580 LOC according to Ramaji's book, which means I'm not in non-duality, but may be there if I would be able to sustain thought-free state all day and surrender the ego. So, the question is, will 170 ug of high quality LSD be enought to put me through a couple levels of consciousness until I can actually reach 600+ and feel non-dual state of awareness for extended periods of time? Maybe even try to stabilize there If yes, what should I do before the trip to achieve that? Meditate for 2 hours a day? For 4 hours a day? Read books about non-duality before the trip? Any help or advice from psychonauts or spiritually advanced people would be greately appreciated, thanks.
  6. Day 15. My record. Man it's getting harder. I fucked up my schedule a little bit. Porn addiction is truly one of the hardest in the world to drop.
  7. @youngshinzen I would want to become a functional human being again Think I'd concentrate on making a bunch of money to keep me busy. But in general to get rid of awful consequences of porn addiction, brain fog, lack of concentration and so on.
  8. @Sahil Pandit Wow that's great. I certainly don't have that much energy on my 14th
  9. @youngshinzen Hey how you feel yourself? Anything in energy/awareness/laziness changed? I'm on my 14th, feel a little bit better, but certainly not a super-human
  10. Great man @TheAvatarState keep it up. I'm on my 14th day. Way more aware when I used to, but certainly not a Super-Human. More energy, do sport every day, but it's not like all my problems melted away when I stopped masturbating
  11. Day 14 Got to sleep in time Read Terence's book. Gonna concentrate on predicting my relapse patterns and try to change the obstacles. Watched how woman masturbate, did not relapse. But won't do it again. My mind tricked me into it.
  12. Day 13 Finally managed to get to sleep in time Reading book by Terence Gorski, 'Staying sober', which I find extremely relevant to porn addiction. Feel a lot of energy, meditated 30 mins today.
  13. @TheAvatarState Man I would recommend you to read the book by Terence Gorski, 'Staying sober'. It really opened my eyes on Post-Abstinential syndrome and how to cope with it (which we does when NoFap)
  14. Day 12 Almost no urges, a lot of energy. Starting to think that I certainly need to buy a book about sexual energy transmutation.
  15. Day 11 I've made a mistake. I played till late evening and then it was very hard to not relapse and just go to sleep. But that's what I did. I certainly would not risk next time