mmKay

Member
  • Content count

    1,390
  • Joined

  • Last visited

Everything posted by mmKay

  1. Firstly I wanted to pin it at red but it ain't complete mafia savagery. If you thought MMA is dangerous, check this out . https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iME0P0WfG0s Turns out there is a whole culture around this, and actual live contests with spectators. Good thing is that they may see God when they get their Ego slapped outta' the Soul. Add this to the " practical guide for enlightenment"
  2. Tinnitus has been a part of my life since the beginning. I actually can't imagine the sound of silence, if that's possible. The more aware I become, the more often I notice it's constantly there buzzing, rinning. Not that it bothers me or something, I already accepted it as part of this existance. You remember that time Leo shared the concentration practice ? You could choose focusing on a inner or outer vision, sensations, breathing, Mantras, etc. But what about focusing on the Tinnitus ringing ? It's the one thing that's as constant as the present moment itself. It never goes away. It is the most essential thing that I have found yet. ( besides direct experience of consciousness, the source of thoughts and perceptions ) Theoretically I should able to access superhuman levels of concentration with such easy target. The thing is that the more I focus on it, the louder it gets. Like REALLY REALLY LOUD. Ear-busting level. Remembers me of the shaking / buzzing that I hear sometimes while I'm half asleep half awake. Could this be the backdoor practice for developing paranormal abilities ? Anyways I wanted to consult if anyone has any kind of similar experience with this before rolling up my sleeves and potentially damaging my hearing or learning how to bend spoons with my bare gaze.
  3. @cypres https://www.szynalski.com/tone-generator/. First time i did a test like this. Looks like the frequency is just at my max hearing capability / where my headphones possibly reach their max ( tried two different headphones, first max was 16100 hz and the second one bout 18.100 hz more or less. My little brother's is around the same, and my older brother isn't here atm but I know he has it as well. It gets louder, more immersing and fluctuates stronger the more I focus on it. Simply for having focused on it for half an hour its way more prominent right now. I had different thoughts. Maybe I'm able to hear radio frequence, or wifi, or other things like that. Maybe it is the cosmic sound of the universe. Maybe we've had a life long ear infection. IDK. But I doubt it's the modern alternatives since I'm pretty sure It's been known about since the roman times back when there was no radio.
  4. @Pookie LOL, that's going to be my niche now. 50 Shades of Astral Grey coming soon
  5. *PG 18* It's relatively easy to do, just "hard" to stay in that dimension for long. I don't know if you ever done it. Just gonna throw a short and sweet description. Basically go to sleep with the intent of regaining pressence exactly when the shift of "mundane consciousness" To "sleep" happens. Would be easier than microwaving a bowl of oatmeal having your base level of consciousness. For the sake of explanation consider this concept : imagine like you have two bodies overalapped on eachother, or as if there was a ghost inside of your physical body that feels EXACTLY LIKE YOUR DIRECT EXPERIENCE. This is the "astral body". You may leave your body by different ways. Rolling out of your physical body, tensing your astral abs and crunching up, or experiencig a sleep paralysis where you cant move ur physical body but "you are aware". From my experience this is the moment where it's easiest to leave. The "muscles" you are trying to move are from the astral body. But idk how to deliberately have sleep paralysis so nevermind that. You leave your body, you float up by default and you controll with your will and thoughts. I'm just so interested in what would happen for you with such level of Awareness. Maybe you could be an astral Lifecoach for machine elves or smth. Just throwing ideas lol. From my handful experiences I was never able to sustain it for more than a relative minute or two. But me and my dad seem to be naturals since we did it with no guidance whatsoever. Little anecdote: there i am, having just popped out of my body. Im floating at the roof of my room. I get myself to fly down vertically. My feet make contact with the floor. It feels cold AF even though IRL I have a carpet. Seems that my horniness followed me to this dimension. First thing that comes to my mind is wow, this is it. I heard I can have astral sex? Then somehow I manifested three hot astral babes. I remember they were blue. But they werent in three dimensions. It was a weird mix between two and three dimensions. It was really dificult and mayne impossible to have a proper look at them. My most accurrate description is two / three dimensional "Mosaic Art" beings. Dmt art and machine elves are close, but these were WAY more humanoid. Anyways, the one in the middle turned around, bent over and sticked her ass out to me. The two on the sides grabbed her asscheeks and pulled them apart. Yass. This is what Ive been meditating all these years for. Thanks to my sharp social skills and deep understanding of female psychology I assumed that this I was an Invitation for me to make a move. Excited, I removed my belt in one strong pull ( weird, because obviously I didnt go to sleep with a belt on) and unzipped my pants. So I flipped out my suprisingly long astral cock to rawdog my new hot interdimensional wife not caring at all about childcare or std's. AND THEN?? Right before sticking it in I got kicked out of the dimension. WOW!? If you ever played minecraft it was EXACTLY as if you loose internet connection or you get banned from a server. Imagine you are inmersed in the game , minding your own business looking at the pixeled screen and from one second to the another you are staring at the lobby screen with the words "disconnected from server" I was COMPLETELY CONSCIOUS during the "dimension switch". It was like flipping a switch. I was sad, dissapointed and horny. I felt like that was a like a standard test towards newbies for deeper access to the dimension. Now I see why its called having " Blue balls " LOL I'm an astral incel. I could have lost my astral virginity. Ive been a sad boi ever since. lol This is your chance to get laid in quarantene guys
  6. Check out this guy who MAKES A LIVING stacking rocks! He actually was able to quit his job and do this full time. Not your usual rag to riches story, but that's one way to break out of Wage Slavery. If this is possible, then what else is? Making real-life-sized portraits of celebrities using only mustard? Creating sculptures out of wrecked laptops? Your imagination is the limit!
  7. Hey, I just wanted to claim the need for a button to go back from the forum to the main site. Many times I find myself browsing the forum, with the urge to go to the juicy " start here " area from the main site, or wanting to access some video, or the LP course and I end google searching the webpage again. Convenience is a strong ally for self-actualization. This may be just a click, but your support would be sick. Sign the petition Here. Just kidding with the signing. It may be a small thing, but imagine the butterfly effect. This one small change may create a new Russel Brand.
  8. Heavily GMO, may containt wheat and gluten that can trigger intolerance. Plus you don't want to be called a SOY BOY do you?
  9. Wow, such law of attraction. You ask and it's given. I noticed it was there all along! On the bottom left center of the website. Nevermind all the hassle.
  10. @Insightful27 I'm not sure what your definitions of " emotionally" and " mentally" are. If by "mentally" you mean beliefs, that's a whole different can of worms. We talking subconscious mind reprogramming, neuro linguistic programming, mantras&affirmations, sleep mantra audios, CBT as you mentioned, " the work" by Byron Katie which is quite similar ( google it for free worksheet, this would be my recommendation, + book is optional) and last but not least, living in a congruent way so your beliefs end up not just being that, lofty beliefs. ( + many more that either I forgot or just don't know about ) Emotions are the elefant in the room. They are in THE BODY You FEEL them. SEPARATE FROM THOUGHT. Nevertheless they are both interconnected. Feelings affect how you think. Thoughts affect how you feel. But, it takes a certain level of practice and awareness to learn how to FEEL the different shades and nuances in the body. Guilt toes not feel the same as fear, or as anger, or as lust, as sadness, as pride, as gratefulness. . . See leo's vid on mastering emotions. I also want to mention that the body carries trauma, as in burried emotions. I haven't digged much into this idea but I realized it was true that time that i corrected my lifelong impoper and shallow way of breathing ( ignoring the whole lower side of the back and mostly chest breathing ), I was struck with three completely irrational waves of crying. Some ways of releasing trauma would be self-therapy ( relaxing and re-living your past, and accepting it ), Osho dynamic meditation, Shamanic breathing or any other alternatives like Wim hoff breathing and his cold water therapy, psychedelics , sedona method and shadow work. My recommendation would be Mindfulness meditation with labeling ( See Leos video about it, so simple yet so powerful )and Shadow work. with the med technique you dissect the whole life experience into : See - feel - hear ( inner and outer ), increases your awareness and shows you how to differenciate between inner and outer feeling , and the boundies it has with the mind ( inner hearing and seeing ) once you got that down, you can do effective shadow work. Shortly : Something happens, you notice your emotional reaction to it, you notice that you are resisting it, you accept that you are resisting it, and then you accept what happened. OR you make something happen that you know makes you have uncomfortable feelings, IE yelling out loud on a busy street, and feel and accept the whole thing. Anywhere where you have some kind of emotional reaction or attachment, is a place to grow emotionally. Once you understand unconditional happiness the reactions become really clear. Google anything that you didn't understand or that you want to get a deeper understanding into. this topic is really broad and tricky. The work is very personal and most of the population are completely clueless about this. I also have a ton to learn here so in no way I have it all figured out. take it slow and GL bro
  11. Hey, I'm sure you can come up with hundreds of ways to make good use of the time yourself. That's my recomendation, it's called " self- coaching ". It's pretty self-descriptive, and if commit putting effort into this, the results will be huge, both right now and over time. So you are getting coached, by yourself. You ask the questions, and tap into your inner intuition and brainstorm the anwsers ( or go directly for the one anwser ) . The more seriously you take it, the better the results. Nevertheless, this below is just a bonus: You most likely have much of Leo's free material to absorb. Besides that, there is Leo's Life Purpose course, which I'm personally doing right now (only took the whole world to get on lockdown for me to sit down and push through the resistance lol ) What I found to work these days to optimize happines: ( Use intuition to assign priorities depending on how you feel throughout the day .) Have some creative outlet , If you have a skill already developed thats a plus, otherwise look for something where you could get in the flow zone ; drawing, storytelling, dancing, speaking out loud, singing, writing, both on paper and digital ( my fav since it's really easy access flow), instruments, video editing, photoshop, create music online, coding . . . Decide to do small projects, or have a big one, whatever this means for you. Work out your mind. Read books, articles, leos blog and his posts on the forum, try to memorize what you think is worth memorizing, learn a new language. Read fiction if you want to. Do some kind of light exercise daily, whenever your boody feels it would prefer ( after sitting for a long while, first thing after waking up, after a nap, after a cold shower . . .) this may be some short jumping, shaking, dancing, wrestling with siblings, punching your pillows or screaming into them, stretching, or streight up calisthenic workout, or just get creative with your body movement, ( my favourite is Osho dynamic meditation, warning, it's somewhat extreme ) Having some kind of practice to disconnect mind chattering, either plain do nothing and observing meditation, mindfulness with labeling, focusing on mantra, direct experience focused looking at your hand, mirror gazing . . . or just visualize your future life, how it may end up, or how you would like it to be. Meet your social needs, chat with your family, jump on some random groups on discord, omegle, or other chatting areas, videocall your friends. . . wrestle someone . . ( yeah I like this one the most lol ) I prefer this to be a vibing - goofing around activity to disconnect and rather not have it too serious, unless you want to. Also shamelessly take care of your sexual desires from time to time, if you have any. Try to get some sun, walk your dog! chill on the balcony, chill by the windows. . . Take care of your emotional needs. This is actually more advanced since it requeires a certain baseline of awareness to be able to properly feel feeligns. If you feel like crying, do it, if you feel like yelling, do it. Laugh out loud shamelessly, get angry and let it go . . . etc And almost forgot, take breaks with completely nothing planned and just doing what you feel like, maybe watch some quality cartoons, funny videos, a cool movie . . . you name it, but notice where is the line between it being "time off" and where you zone into unconsciousness, laziness and adiction. Or don't do any of this, your choice. GL! - remember, self-coaching -
  12. @Dan502 For now ye, but huge amounts of people binge shopping all over the country and stuff runs out till they refill the next day. No wonder folks react like that ,since in a matter of days they went from ignoring the problem to a two week obligatory quarentene and sending everyone home besides pharmacy bank and supermarket workers. Not like I left home that much before but still kind of sucks.
  13. He's honing his healing skills to make his cough heal people, but no one will belive him and he will be disregarded as filthy and rude. Srlsy though, I'm in Spain, sh1t escalated from 0 to 100 real quick in just 2 days. Pretty much no one can leave home or they get fined. Whole country paralized. It's nice to have a different perspective to apareciate how comfy life was before. At least Italy has free premium P0rN for people in quarentene, we just have sum shitty premium cable TV. Most likely the disease ain't that deadly, but the panic is having real life consequences. Lesson from Spain : if it's there, ACT HERDER AND FASTER!
  14. So, what came first, the chicken or the egg? First of all, lets notice that this question is based upon the premise of time, and secondly, a chicken-egg duallity. Both are mental constructs. They are merely thoughts and dont exist in Actuallity ( the raw, direct present moment ) The end. But on the other hand: You may also say that both the chicken and the egg have both allways existed, and allways will, at once. Also reallity is both groundless and completely direct, so it simply creates out of thin air and doesnt need a "how" or some kind of causal chain. But also, the causal chain for both of them is INFINITE. On the other side, as you colapse the chicken-egg duallity as they are only concepts, you notice that the only difference between the two is the one that you mentally create. So actually the two are one. But wait! There is also a subtle duallity between Self/other going on. You know its coming. Yes, YOU are both the chicken and the egg! Think about that the next time you make an egg omlet. You are making an omlet out of yourself, and then proceed to eat it. And then you poop yourself out. Yes, you are your poop. Also, simultaneously, you are none of that. Have fun flexing your newly acquired wisdom to your friends. Warning: some may think you're bonkers and unfriend you on fb. (:
  15. Haven't posted for the last couple of days as I felt quite overworked. But that's fine. Went through some ego-backlash and I experienced some strong emotions where I noticed that my coping mechanism is to numb myself with food, even if not unhealthy. Just eating for distraction, most preferably filling foods like carbs. But instead of that I did nothing and I felt into my body. Cried for about 15 min in various streaks and felt quite relieved after. I't wasn't precisely about food. In short, it was more because of the confusion of the pointlesness of life and mystery of existance, and the fact that I noticed how attached I am to some family members. Anyways, didn't have any refined sugars, wheat or dairy products. Mixing raw onion with avocado for breakfast seems to mitigate the irritability of the onion. Eating raw garlic and onion in the mornings is something I want to learn to add to my breakfasts as I see how they are one of the BIGGEST magic pills when it comes to health. The price to pay is the gut irritation and bodily and mouth odour. But I'll put effort into solving that part. Lately I'm thinking about a how a healthy sustainable diet would look for me. As I have spent some time researching the different diets, foods to avoid and contradictory advice I think If I stay away from dairy and wheat ( + gluten ? ) and refined sugar, I should be good to go for the next 20 years of my life. Probably I'd avoid pre-packed and processed food as well. Yesterday I found out that you can blend chickpeas to make chickpea flour and do flatbread with it. Oh my god I'm in love. I ate quite a bit of that, and then about a jar and a half of blended lentels during the rest of the day. First I wanted do find out if I could just blend them and toss on the frying pan to make flatbread, but it turned out a disaster and I just ate most of it as a soup. Gotta say I went overboard with 'dem lentels since I feel the gases till now lol. I'm really enjoying cooking lately. Excited to learn new delicious, healthy, convenient and easy dishes. Happy 2020 !!
  16. Nevermind, looks like cauliflower made me bloated and fart for the whole night Quite uncomfortable tbh. Perhaps I'd get my gut used to it over time, but I'll look for other foods / cooking methods GN
  17. Just pooped first time in two days lol. Kind of happy I saw that I had digested the garbanzo beans ( yeah gross I know ) Got in the habit of having the same salads in the morning, that looks like a good part of my morning routine as it makes me happy and energetic (lettuce, pink salt, olive oil, 2 sliced tomatoes, half red onion, sometimes cucumber, and one avocado. Having added the red onion, I noticed sometimes it makes me bloated. May be because it's some aggressive to eat onion first thing in the morning, but I love it so f^ck it. Enjoy my dragon breath lol. Spent 'bout two hours cooking and shopping for healthy food today and I have enjoyed every second. It's nice to take your time and think about all the posibilities of the food, how can you cook it conveniently, whats the quality / price ratio, if I can take it to work, what can I mix it with, will it spike my bloodsugar, etc. I decided to look for vegetables that I don't usually eat. Bought a whole cauliflower and DAMN I'm in love. Seems that you can even eat it raw, and it's on the clean 15 list for lowest pesticides applied. Also it's low glycemic which means that the carbs are absorbed slowly and dont spike bloodsugar. High on fiber making you feel full. Totally in love, as today I grated it in a bowl and used it as rice or lentels substitute. Made a stir fry with olive oil, grated cauliflower, chopped onion, garlic, salt and 3 organic eggs. It was so good that I dropped a few tears thinking that this is something that I can actually eat over the long run without digestion problems. I saw plenty more of interesting recipes with cauliflower. New staple food? let's find out! Dehydration is a bigger issue right now. I keep forgetting to drink water and find myself fatigued. Gotta set clever reminders. I still feel full and somewhat bloated from the meal, but not physically tired as in " I just want to sleep" and mentally foggy. I'll see how long the satiating effect lasts and then eat the leftovers at work. L8er!
  18. After having eaten the garbanzo beans I woke up feeling like all the progress had regressed, I'm guessing it's a mix of the blood sugar spike from the carbs and the fact that once again I didn't put thought into drinking water. Later in the day when I remembered about the existance of hydration, I chugged down 3/4 of a whole bottle instantly and effortlessly lol. In fact, I woke up as If I had binged on junk food the last day. Opened my eyes around 9AM but stayed in bed for the next 2 hours skimming through another nutrition ebook, with little motivation to get out outta' the sheets. But time to get to work was approaching, and I decided to jump out of bed and have a veggie breakfast, and woah, it makes a HUGE difference with how it feels to eat lentels. I had lettuce with extra virgin olive oil, lemon 2 organic tomatoes, a chunk of organic cucumber, a whole avocado and some sliced red onion. WOAH, after that I found myself happy for the day, humming songs and feeling energetic. I feel that's how an A+ breakfast should feel at least as far as my knowledge goes right now. It gave me a surreal mood boost. Later on for lunch I wanted to steam those mussels but I actually froze them by mistake the day before and I had to throw them out ): So I hardboiled 3 organic eggs and tossed them in a similar salad as in the morning ,ate that, and I gotta say I have zero brain fog at all. Got somewhat sleepy after eating but I can't tell if it's because I was tired from before or its the food making me exhausted. I'm excited to keep trying new foods to see how they make me feel. Something that I'm pretty sure now is that low carb is the way for me. Also It looks that no matter what I eat my physical energy will stay somewhat the same if I don't improove the sedentary habits. For now I have no organic way of implementing it into my lifestlye. Maybe if I biked to work, had a walk with some audiobook, went swimming or did hatha yoga would help. That's probably going to be the next step of implementation I have little to no cravings for sugar now. My mom baked another Zebra cake and I did not have to burry it. I just put in on a shelf and forgot about it (: The thing is , I forgot that there is a book that guides you EXACTLY through this challenge I had set for myself and even more, laying out all the steps and tricks. I'll look more into that. L8er!
  19. Sigh. I'm confused. So again, after a 7 days of eating nothing but vegetables I decided add something more to my diet to see how It affects my body/mind. Ate those 400ish grams of coocked organic garbanzo beans, that I was really excited to eat TBH because I love the taste and they are super convenient. BUT for the next 6 hours I felt that I'm still digesting them. I felt uneasy. I felt food in my stomach but I had craving for more. I ate some steamed mushrooms and green peeas that I brought from home. I don't know if it spikes my blood sugar , have some alergic reaction, not used to digesting it or the carbs from legumes remind my body of the sugar binges I used to do kicking off a crave sensation. Will I have to give up legumes? Sadly I'm staying open to the posibility. I'm guessing meat would feel way lighter on the body. Tomorrow more good food. It's 1:24 AM. GN !
  20. Fast update as I'm in a rush back to work. After I ended the first part of my split shift, I was hungry. I didn't want to eat another avocado at work, and somehow I forgot to drink water during the whole day. If my discernment is correct, that's why I felt really weak pretty irritable for that time. That's a discovery for me : how much lack of water affects both mood and physical energy. I mean, I knew it theoretically, but now I know how it feels in direct experience. Usually having a veggie breakfast was enough to feel at least pretty normal for the next couple of hours, but this time I was feeling tired. Headed towards the LIDL supermarket thats close to my house in search of organic products, that other spanish supermarket chains HAVE A COMPLETE LACK OF ! Here they are called " ecological " instead of "orcanic" or "biologic" and is only found in the german supermarket chains Aldi and Lidl, at least that I know. So without looking at the prices, I decided to shop for Ecological veggies. Got myself quite a buch of them. Since one week has passed, I thought about adding a little something extra to my diet, either high quality meat, fish or legumes. Meat-wise there was nothing. As far as fish, I got myself some frozen mussels with the shell that I'll steam either this week or next week. It's quite funny how excited I was about just food. Something that hasn't to me before. So I got myself some Ecologial chickpeas aka " garbanzo " here In spain. I was nervous. I love lentels and there are really mixed opinions between it being a superfood and something to avoid. I ate only 400g, with the soup that it comes cooked in ( Ingredients : salt, ecological garbanzo beans, and water ). It felt really good to be eating something else than vegetables. I was really happy and in my head I was thinking that If this feel good for my body I'm willing to drop meat. I felt a tiny bit sleepy 30 min after eating, but besides that, energy levels repleated, didn't percive brain fog or anything. I do feel them in my stomach. It feels like they aren't easy to digest. No abnormal gut issues for now. I'll report back l8er. -sorry 4 sloppy writing - in a rush- CY@
  21. LAST WEEK, AROUND THIS TIME, I WOKE UP WITH THE INSPIRATION TO START THIS CHALLENGE. YEAH Booiiiiii Later on I'll do a TL;DR and conclusion of the first week of clean eating. Day 7 ! Woke up around 10:30 AM. I don't remember walking up during the night this time. Just average energy levels, nothing too special. I'm not feeling like superman getting out of bed. At least I'm not feeling shit and sugar-hangovered. What I feel is probably dehydration ( swolen face skin ) and too much screen time and artificial light before bed ( swolen eyes ). I'll probably add daily 20 min slow breathing meditation before bedtime which should help with A LOT with sleep hygiene. I still need to consider if this is the level up that I want to make for the next week. ( I'm going slow and steady, focusing on just clean eating right now ) Pooped for the first time in 30 hours ?? My stomach is digesting and absorbing the vegetables rather than sh*tting everything out. After Oil pulling and tongue scraping, I had breakfast : 'Bout 400 g of frozen broccoli, that I steamed with one whole onion and bout 6 garlic cloves. Pink salt, black pepper and I finished it off with one whole avocado as I got somewhat worried that they may be going bad. I just left them on the table for this whole time, I have little to no clue on how to conserve them actually. I do know you aren't suposed to pick on their branch end or they will go black real fast. I'll look into it. Lately I'm remembering to do the mindful eating ritual of clapping and rubbing my hands to get in the present moment. GG for me. Gut's not complaining. No brainfog, no severe tiredness although I do feel stiff and " lazy " . Off to work, got split shift today so I'll work a bit during the day and the rest during the night. I'll think about doing grocerie shopping during my free time. L8er!
  22. Woah, the cold shower I took was so cold that I had to stick my feet in a sink at work 'cause I couldn't feel the soles of my feet or pinkies. I'm good now though. Still, it was worth it. Came back from work at 2 AM. Gotta say I'm starting to feel that my gut's getting used to digesting vegetables. Nice and steady levels of physical energy during the whole 7 hours I was working. 4 hours in, I had my break for food. I made a HUGE salad. Bunch of lettuce, 2 big sliced tomatos, a handful of shredded carrots from the salad bar, a pinch of fresh chopped garlic, a sprinkle of red onion ( one of my fav ingridients probly ), 2 WHOLE AVOCADOS , and some sliced cucumber with skin and spring onion even though it's probably not even washed - *shrugs* - 3/4 squeezed lime, extra virgin olive oil and some table salt that tastes quite stronger, and more artificial, than my pink salt at home. Ate 95% of it in about 25 min. I feel my jaw muscles got stronger and don't get fatigued that easily now from chewing. I got a couple strange looks and comments here and there because of my dish that I dismissed. Energy levels went even higher after eating even though I felt quite damn full. The thing is, most likely I'm still adapting to the diet change. I was bloated for the next 4 hour It's 2:40 am and I'm not feeling tired. I'll keep reading the nutrition e-book and then try to get some sleep. GN.
  23. Focus levels were steady after the meal. Body somewhat tired but I guess that's normal because of my sedentary habits. While reading I started getting really pissed at the fact that I really don't know sh*t about Health, compared with all the information that's out there, and let's not talk about everything where we can be wrong or even what we don't know. Massive research is needed. Again, for now I'll just stick with intuition, direct experience reactions to food, keep absorving knowledge and not worry too much. Also this gave me a quite big motivation boost to take life and personal development more seriously. I saw some of the unfulfilled potential. I Ate a sliced up onion that I steamed with 'bout 500g of frozen brocolii and 5 garlic cloves. Also had the 3/4 of tomato and some mushed lettuce with lemon and olive oil that I had left over from breakfast. I'll have a freezing shower before heading out to work. Energy levels are 7/10 if not more. Feeling full in a good way. No brain fog. Just it's so god damn cold woah LOL I'll probably eat lettuce with lime, olive oil, avocado and tomatoes at work. I'll report back at night. L8er!
  24. @Amandine Yeah, I've experienced weird stuff like that with sleep (; , besides seeing a ghost when I was a kid and some short astral proyection / lucid dreaming relative recently. I'm noticing my limbs fall asleep WAY faster and easier now. - Funny how sleep affects our intelect haha. Beggining of day 6. Woke up in the middle of the night after dreaming that I had indulged in two sugar sprinkled pastry slugs ( actually the other day I also dreamt that I had found couple of grapes in my wardrobe -wth?- and instantly ate them ). I felt kind of dissapointed after walking up, confused if I had betrayed my commitment or not lol. Woke up again around 10:30 because of an alarm that I had forgotten to turn off for today. Lied under the bedsheets 'bout half hour more, feeling quite weak , underslept and probably dehydrated, with little initiative to start the day since my goal doesnt require me to do anything besides healthy eating. That's staying the top priority for these 6 weeks, but I will add as a secondary goal to really upgrade my knowledge about health. This will give me something specific to focus on besides the important meals, work and consistently sharing this. Basically researching the sh*t out of this field. This will be primarely a research phase, not embodying phase. I'm talking seeking understanding of theory and practice of nutrition, fasting , fitness, sleep, bloodwork, supplements, grocery shopping skills and techniques, convenient eating strategies, improving breathing, posture and striving to create a custom diet for my particular body and lifestyle. All of this, understanding that it's actually a very long term process. Mind/body direct experience of reactions to food , exercise or techniques, and trust in intuition will remain my judges for discernment and guidance. Most likely I'll have little time in January between work and the fact that I'll be intensely building my camper van. That will be another challenge for healthy eating. The challenge officially ends 1st February. During these 6 weeks I'll be very strict and promise I'll put my best effort. After that, I still have to decide. I foresee a commitment to a healthy living , but I still need to define by my own terms what this actually means. I think I may have thyroid issues as the symptoms somewhat fit me. I'll look into it. Anyways, as usual felt quite weak going out of bed ( around 11:30) , and I did it with no particular goal. Stood up, did some light stretching movements like sitting in deep squat, cobra pose and reverse bowing with my arms in the air. Also found some place to free hang for a couple of seconds. This is what felt the most. I'll be doing more of that . Period. Somewhat improved physical energy. Did the oil pulling - tongue scratching and didn't even wash my teeth as It's not smelling at all for now. I'll do that before work at 6pm. For breakfast, I had the leftover spinach from the bottom of the bag, half of a new bag of Iceberg lettuce, the lemon juice I had forgotten to pour in yesterday ( lol ) , quite a bit of olive oil, pink salt and powdered black pepper, with three tomatoes and one yellow bell pepper that I had first soaked in vinegar / tap water and then cut up in chunky pieces, because I noticed I prefer to chew on the whole pieces rather than having to keep stabbing little pieces with my fork. After 15 min I felt full and left 3/4 of a tomato and some green leaves for later. I think a whole lemon is too sour for a salad. I'll try using just half next time or go for some vinegar. Feeling energetic andsharp for now. Gut ain't complaining. Did 10 min of deep and slow breathing meditation that woke me up even more + some crawling around the room and dynamic stretching before sitting down to read. At 6 I'll start preparing for work. L8er!
  25. Finished having my last meal of the day around 9 PM. Had 450g of frozen brussel sprouts that I steamed together with 2 onions that I cut in half, 2 peeled carrots and 3 garlic cloves Actually I popped open a jar of olives while food was in the steam cooker and I stabbed 'bout 6 on a toothpick. When buying I looked at all the labels to make sure they don't contain added sugar. These are just olives, salt, citric acid ( vitamin c ? ) and some antioxidant additive, which is in my opinion quite clean for food in a jar. They also are pausterized, which is probably not ideal. I had couple of them and then proceeded to observe myself. The intense salty - sour flavor induces crave. After I had one, I wildly wanted more, more and more. Also it looks like the sourness isn't gentle to an semi-empty stomach,. There was definately some mild kind of reaction. I don't think these will be a staple of my diet, even though they are relatively cheap, tasty, convenient, packed with calories and perhaps healthy. At least not during this challenge. TBH, I was surprised how good the onions, carrots and garlics turned out. That's DEFINATELY something I'll be doing more of in the future. About the brussel sprouts, I ate like 10 and threw the rest in the garbage. I don't like how they taste even with salt and pepper. Side to side with the other veggies they tasted crappy and artificial IMO. I'll try steaming non-frozen brussel sprouts somewhen soon. In between these last 2 meals I felt some withdrawal and craving for intense tasting food and stimulation. It's not completely gone yet. There was a moment where I almost shed a tear thinking about some of my favorite cereal or donuts. Don't worry, you will find equally good tasting recipes with time. Leave this time for experimenting with this different diet. Sometimes I catch myself fantasizing if I could make work a life where I ate whatever and played videogames and just BS around. feels tempting, but remember, you've been there. Also felt kinda empty and somewhat not at ease. I'm familiar with this feeling. Boredom is existential. I kept listening to the audiobook and I lost some interest in the topics he was covering, I already had eaten and reported my experience of last meal here, and saw couple of videos in YouTube before I stopped myself from going on a unconscious spiral of binge watching random s^it. Just sat there on my couch covered with a few blankets experiencing the present moment. I wasn't able to feel complete in the now. Maybe withdrawal from carbs, overstimulation and entretainment, IDK. I'm also not playing videogames or watching that much stuff. I don't want to fall in downwards spyrals of unconscious behaviour. Gotta get used to being fulfilled with little stimulation. I play-fighted with my little brother trying to immobilize eachother. I didn't feel weak after the meal, even though it felt relatively heavier on the gut compared with the horse-sized salad I ate this morning. Also I feel that gave me more energy than anything else I've done during the day. I think I'll wait till I pee one more time before going to bed as the veggies I ate contain water and I won't drink anything. Got my 4 blankets in place, 1 and half hour since dinner and had light cardio with my bro. Sounds like a recipy for good night sleep this time. I'll just pop an audiobook and set it to turn itself off after 45 min, so I don't have any artificial light or screen time directly before bed. - Damn my feet get cold the whole time - Merry Christmas L8er!