Ampresus

@d0ornokey Forget the experience part then. I just feel like doing charity work more than normal work. I would like to help people. Does Leo say anything about that?

Hello everyone. Something which came across my mind back when I was home alone for a week was what I wanted to do. I already know what I really want to do, but even if I get to go to university and get my degrees, I'll probably still need work experience. I started contemplating more about this and realized that I didn't want to work. I didn't want to do a stupid job with minimum wage just for the work experience. So I came up with an alternative: volunteer work. My first thought was volunteering for the United Nations, however I am too young. That is ultimately my barrier. Most non-profit organizations aren't particularly looking for teens, at least not in my area. Maybe I can land an interview, but as I previously mentioned I don't know what I am qualified for. I have basically no experience. I don't know what things there are that one can volunteer for. I did some research on my own, but only found vacancies which require some kind of experience. I hope someone can help me out here.

@Girzo Between 14 and 17. Thanks for the recommendations.

@pink What’s your point? Greta isn’t loved in my area either.

What I mean is that for a long time now I have been eating food from my home only. I haven't ordered anything or ate at a restaurant in a long time. When I do eat anything from any restaurant, it usually is something with noodles, veggies and hot sauce. There is this one restaurant in my town that always promotes its ''healthy'' meals, but I can't really argue with them when compared to other restaurant. Stuff like Subway is just garbage. Now every Sunday I usually order fish. You can see that after a few weeks I get tired of eating it. It can be good, but getting all those bones or whatever you call it out of my mouth is pretty annoying. I also understand that most if not all pizzas are not that healthy, sames goes for McDonalds and stuff obviously. So what do you recommend? I have never tried sushi now I come to think about it...

Hello everyone. Recently I, during the holidays as a matter of fact, decided to spend hours with no distractions. Just there, in plain boredom. What I have discovered over the past few weeks is that I always feel terrible after having some kind of terrible thought. For example: I think about killing myself and afterwards I feel terrible. Or when I think about old times and afterwards I feel really bad and want to go back in time. Back when stuff was ''better''. Usually these thoughts used to come up and I would gladly join the path, with no ''taking a step back and look at what is actually going on''. Meditating has helped me see this. Helped me see my thoughts for what they are. Thoughts. Ever since I haven't really dealt with my own build-up anxiety, depression or loneliness, but did try to process, mostly sadness, in case they randomly came up without my own ''contribution'' so to speak. Now during this long boring session I noticed how many times those negative thoughts would try to come up. I didn't stop them, I just watched them. Without giving them much of my own energy, they quickly faded away into nothingness. Of course, me not being that experienced, I cant keep up ''watching my thoughts'' for longer than a view minutes. This made me think: Are it those thoughts that cause the way I feel? And if I wanted to control my emotions, all I would have to do is learn to control my thoughts? Your ''thoughts'' about this? Do you think I'm right? Bonus: If I could somehow influence other people's thoughts, could I influence their emotions too? Sounds like devilry when I put it like that... Sorry if this may come over as dumb for some people. I feel like I made a great discovery about my own emotions.

@SoonHei This really makes it clear to me. Thank you so much for explaining. I never play table tennis btw, but I understand what you mean.

Hello everyone. Recently, like many others apparently, I came across many videos of old speeches from Terence Mckenna. That made me look him up on this forum and it turns out that you guys are well aware of him. However, Leo put him both on the Green and Turquoise list. That made me confused. I heard Terence talk about stuff like ''the truth requires no belief'' so that made me think that he is Turquoise. Well, what do I know. I have never done psychedelics and quickly clicked on ''uninterested'' on all those videos. I don't see how he could help me. What are your thoughts about this?

Hello everyone. School is going fine, I get enough money from my parents and they buy all the stuff I need. Even compared to decent rich kids in my class I get decent money. However, I want more. Haha, yeah. You see last summer break all of the sudden it went down with a lot for the first time (paying for nice treatment in Istanbul is expensive alright)). Sure I can save it again and then give it away again, but I would like something more. I discovered a loophole in the black market here and know a way to gain a monopoly. It is very tempting for me to work on it you see. Normally people do this stuff cause they are in need of big money real quick. I don't. I just want enough money, loads of money, for my future me. Btw, I am already secured in the area of ''getting a job'' so you don't need to comment on that. If there is any other way you might think would be far better than engaging in the black market, please tell me. And yes, I am well aware that I wouldn't want to engage in the black market for the rest of my life.

@flowboy If only it were so easy man. I have 2 books for school that I have to read and someone really advised me to read David Hawkins’ “Letting Go” relating to an addiction problem I have. But sure man I will put it in my to-read list.

@flowboy I never did this man. You took my message out of context. I meant with “this will be it” that the final situation of my topic would be one answer and that’s it. Me still doubting whether I should or not. I didn’t blame anyone. Yet here you are throwing false accusations at me.

@flowboy Angry people tend to say this stuff a lot you know.

@flowboy Damn it must suck being angry so easily

Damn this is a huge book. I am no American and so had no clue what the hell Abe had actually done and why he was so famous. Gotta admit: details about people I didn’t know at all were very unnecessary in my opinion. Why would I care about Salmon P. Chase’s wife? Make this book a bit too much. Overall liked the end a lot. Now I understand how the Civil War went down in the USA. If you are really interested in politics and wouldn't mind learning from the history of politics, I highly suggest you buy this book. 3/5 stars

@Knock That is why I posted it about it on here. I know the risks. @Knock I mean it is so appealing. I am open for any suggestions, but if no one else responds I guess this will be it.

It always has left a scar on my subconscious mind. I remember the critical moments when I was little and didn’t know what was going on. I heard screams and before I knew it the police arrived. Currently it is not much of a pain in the ass, besides that I have to give my Sundays up cause the judge thought it was a nice idea for me and my siblings to spend the Sundays with my dad. Even though we all agreed we didn’t want to and testified against it. My parents are both imperfect and ignorant. I am almost 18 and will instantly move out when the time comes. I have huge international plans and will at some point not look back at what is left of them. Just a few more years....

On school days I go to bed around 09:50 PM (but fall asleep between 10:00 PM and 10:30 PM) and wake up always on 06:35 AM. Weekends I sleep around 11-12 PM and wake up around 09:00 AM.

@Michael569 most what Michael says I agree with. Personally I started rationalizing about this a lot. “Alright BUT WHY do I feel like dressing differently today?” and stuff like that. I tried to look at everything from the perspective of the people I wanted to impress and I realized that they weren’t even a bit worried about me. All they care about is themselves too! Everyone is constantly lost in their thoughts which are somehow related to them. That girl with the new highlighter? She bought that cause it’s trending. The boy with the nice sneakers? He knew Kanye West wore that on Instagram and bought it. I stopped doing my hair, wear most of the same clothes everyday and try to always be true to myself even with others. Sure sometimes I have tendencies, but the trick is then to observe it.

Hello everyone. Recently it has come clear to me that I seem to have elevated my social status in my school. People talk to me regularly, greet me, joke with me and say goodbye to me. Compared to my previous year, I seem to be doing great. My thing is that sometimes there are 2 girls calling my name from different directions while I am talking to my mate about economy class. Or when I am talking with a girl from my class and a classmate of mine calls my name. These scenarios where multiple people try to communicate with me leave me confused. If I ignore the calling, they usually tell me later that I ''skipped'' them. More importantly, I see my male mates as higher priority than attention from girls, yet sometimes I have this urge to ignore them for attention from girls. I have no clue how to act on this accordingly. What do I do? (I notice that my teachers ignore me until they're done with the person they're talking with, and copying their way of dealing with this might make me come over as a ''teacher'')

Hello everyone. Do you ever wish you were some kind of almighty being? Some emperor or king? Or in general, a very influential person? I sometimes wish people looked up to me, that it would mean a lot for other people to get my attention/validation/approval. Having me as a friend would be someting people would brag about. Whenever I am fighting or arguing with someone, people would know the consequences of arguing with me. People would know the consequences of ''fucking'' with me (both online and IRL). Truth is: I hold 0 power. My question is then: what would be a self-actualized way to deal with this urge? Chase it and see where it leads me? I am actually clueless.

@Chakra Lion That is the thing man. I am currently struggling to control my mind and emotions. I am meditating though and soon will be trying Kriya yoga. Controlling how I behave has been one of the easiest things I have done in my life. I am extremely disciplined, like seriously. Well... that is in public. I still have some addictions which I take part in during my private free time. Not proud of those... This urge for power is really just controlling other people, the way they think about me and in general about certain stuff. Even though I can control myself for a bit, this urge always comes up when people either annoy me or I am bored and my mind takes me to fantasy land. You suggest I try to control myself completely and see how I feel afterwards? If so, what practices do you recommend for controlling mind and emotions?

@MAYA EL Nice man. You just called me a beta male without actually answering my question. If you can’t relate at all, why bother answering to my topic? Seriously what am I supposed to do with what you just said?

It is strange how much I can relate with you. I ended up in a huge chunk of anxiety and tried to masturbate it off. I felt incredibly fatigued. I barely managed to go to the gym. I skipped school for a day just to get my head right. I don’t know about you but I have only ever had one girlfriend, which I didn’t treat good at all and left after a month. I realized during that time that having a girlfriend felt too much like a burden. I wasn’t happy then and so this time with this other girl I started giving her less attention. Truth is I am full of lust and she probably isn’t planning to deal with lust alone. Maybe I actually like her, but I guess I’ll never find out. In the end I just want sexual intimacy so badly... Good luck man. I haven’t found some kind of solution for this so far. I have become more mindful though.... I am pretty sure enlightenment is knocking on the door, I just don’t know which door.

@CreamCat I just noticed a typo. I meant ''wouldn't''. Jeez that put a completely different meaning to my message. @CreamCat So you're saying I should first of all be wary of the power I already posses and after that try to chase it, but not feel frustrated when it takes too long?

@Matt8800 Elaborate ''low and high vibrational power'' please. @Matt8800 Dude this isn't helping me. I was asking what I should do with this urge, not for a summary of a potential consequence in case I DO get the power. I can't do much with this you see.