XYZ

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About XYZ

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    Los Angeles County, CA
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    Male
  1. Alcohol addiction hasn't been a problem for me unlike other things, because it's very obvious how shitty I feel when I drink too much, or two often. I choose to avoid hard liquor, except for the occasional mini added to another drink, but am fine with having 2-4 beers or white claws one or 2 days a week. Or none at all for a few months at a time. This spring I thought I would not drink because it's just not necessary I don't need it, but a few times when I ordered kombucha from Amazon, they sent an alcoholic variety as an automatic substitute for something out of stock, and wasn't going to waste it. Then realized how ridiculous it is being straight edge, makes as little sense to me as drinking daily. Also fuck everyone who shames people for drinking or says it's un-spiritual. Alcoholic beverages are the most accessible, and for many of us the only readily available tool to temporarily alter our state of consciousness instantly, real benefits to being more open minded and creative. To use it wisely is to let go of self counsciousness, break old routines that don't serve us, develop new habits that we stick with even in a sober state. To use it unwisely would be to use alcohol as a crutch you depend on rather than something you do for fun occasionally.
  2. Yep, I just choose a time when I will first eat, and 8 hours later when I will not eat afterwards, fast the other 16 hours and stick to it every day (allowing for one day a week when I have an online event that runs later and I can't eat during). Seems absurdly simple but powerful, it's a new habit for me, but quality of life noticeably improved already, and the discipline is starting to carry over into other areas of life.
  3. I stopped caring, it's totally natural for a healthy man to get hard talking to women, even if you're not thinking anything sexual. Angle it away though so it looks less threatening, like you're saying don't worry about my excited little friend down there.
  4. You may get a laugh out of this. I was watching the coronavirus task force press conference yesterday, and the way Trump speaks is so childish, that later when he was talking about getting out in the sun as a means to kill the virus, I suddenly had a flashback to this Barney song I completely forgot about for 25 years:
  5. Assuming it is even is possible to make a vaccine that works long term, yes, since I'm sure it will be mandatory for just about everything. Unless I take a test that shows I've been exposed to SARS-2 without noticing and developed lasting immunity. Global pandemics kill the anti-vaxer movement.
  6. It's more about prioritization. Would rather spend my waking hours doing yoga, breathwork, other exercise and walks outside while I still can than laundry often. It's obviously very different if you have a house and it's something you can do any time right there. And compared to using the apartment building laundry room, with all the back and forth trips and extra cleaning of the machines and handwashing it must be a real bitch to have to take your clothes to the laundromat necessarily every time you wash them. One thing I do notice is my hampers are filling up with towels. Lots of washing my hands means towels getting very wet, staying wet longer, and changed often.
  7. Absolutely plenty of then on youtube you can search for. Best investment I made last month was a thick latex yoga mat, too heavy to ever bring to an IRL yoga class, but at home, it's allowed me to do all kinds of dance cardio core workouts with much more intensity than if I was just stomping on the floor. Gained visible abs despite eating too much.
  8. Yeah normally I'd not want to smell, and I don't like when other people smell. But since I'm going to be alone all the time and when outside everyone is supposed to stay 2 metres away anyway, that doesn't matter. And I usually end up washing shirts and pants when they get too sticky feeling before they'd stink more then I'd want to smell them myself.
  9. Before a month ago, putting something in the laundry hamper was determined by coming into contact with outside surfaces. But now I don't sit anywhere or touch anything except at home. Socks and underwear I change after every 2-3 days of use, but everything else I just keep wearing. From a health and safety standpoint how often should you wash clothes in general? I don't want to do laundry too often because it costs money to use the machines and for the limited supply of disinfecting wipes I use. Figure if I'm not sitting in buses, offices, gym floors and restaurants, and never touch anything or anyone when I go outside for neighborhood walks there's not much point in doing laundry often, and I can save myself the stress of dragging shit in and out of the laundry room regularly, wear clothes until they smell like shit.
  10. A. Wall. Of. Text.
  11. And after re-reading my post I cried for some reason, tears of gratitude and relief it seems.
  12. I've never done so much deep breathing before, and I never had the discipline to actually do a full yoga and pranayama class at home. Now that that's the only option, I'm doing it all the time, not at all self-conscious to make loud noise and chant the mantras with all my heart and voice. Less than a year ago I would often go long time without chanting mantra at home, only at a yoga class, and be pretty lazy and self neglecting. Ironically I've never felt healthier in some ways, literally forced to not take things for granted. All those solo projects I've been putting off working on and finishing, everyday health habits to make and stick to, being mindful of how I use every waking moment, it took this shit to get myself in order. If I feared catching the corona or if things would be like this forever I supposed I'd just drink, jack off, play video games and watch TV all the time. Of course there is the occasional moment sulking and even crying once in a while, I can just change my state by going back to deep breathing. There has been fake news going around that filling up lungs and holding your breath is a self test for the virus, but just doing it as an exercise, and to an extreme, like breathing so deep it feels like your lungs will explode, holding breath over a minute, then exhale slowly as you can, it really stretches out the lungs and keeps them healthy. Also lifts my mood back up to 9/10 and full of energy. Now I wonder just why in the heck I didn't do this every day before, as well as all the other pranayama, which purifies my mind, strengthens my body, and is basically like getting high off oxygen and vagus nerve stimulation. Being a yogi and meditator but also suffering from the social isolation and touch deprivation which has merely just begun, and reaching just the tip of awakening a few times before then chickening out, it seems inevitable I will face that fear and wake the fuck up for real this time during the next few months. As it's only been a week or 2 of this madness in the West, I'd expect many on the depressive side of things will go through Eckhart Tolle style intense awakenings as a result of extreme stress and mental breakdown.
  13. This was my mantra for 30 years, I never asked to be born, didn't choose to exist here, all this was forced upon me, it'y my parents fault I am alive. Then I had a mystical experience, and the first thing that happened when consciousness started to leave the body is a direct remembering that it did choose this life, it created the whole thing. Intuitively it felt exactly what it was like before being born, as if no time had passed, as if there were no such thing as birth or death. Before that point spirituality was just something I did to cope with life. And though I haven't yet went deep enough behind the veil to figure out what life is all about, or if I have some purpose of being here in human form, there is a pervading calmness, even in the worst of times I can return to it. Because now I've experiences firsthand that this is all a dream, everything is divinity, everything is okay, there is nothing to be afraid of.
  14. "this is mother nature's revenge"