Javfly33

? @Devin Amen

Lately I am becoming less and less people "pleaser" with some family members I used to have attachment to. I have stopped talking with my mother on the phone. Now only texting and much less than usual. With other family member (my aunt) I said to her I wasn't going back for christmas. This was "big" for me because they are pretty conservatism and traditional so it difficult for me to say them that. Today I got a message from my aunt telling me they were going to miss me in tonight's dinner and that she would call me at night. I just ignored the message and don't even checked my phone through the night. What do I say all of this? Well, I'm very tired of people like my mother or my aunt (since my father died she kinda become a little more paternalistic with me) treating me like im 16. I want say NO to them. I want to set my boundaries. I don´t want to talk to my mother on the phone because It doesn't make feel good and I don't give a fuck if she has emotional attachment. She will have to learn to let it go. Fuck going to my aunts daughter baptism because I hate religion and I don't want to go to that stupid things. God I have such a tremendous anger for some family members, (basically most of my father's side family- my aunt and grandma) and my mother. I want to give to them a big fuck you constantly. I probably have repressed trauma of being people pleaser and that's why this anger is coming up. Maybe some people that have gone through the same can speak on the matter. I'm basically deconstructing the whole morality of being " good guy" and Im just this discovering true unconditional love: Putting myself first always and accepting each choice and not judging me ever. It´s weird because it's unknown territory. But something feels right in all of this. I still find myself judging myself sometimes in that I am being "bad" or being "selfish" though.

paying for their feet pics...that´s that count as having sex with them?

First, now it's my mother. My father is dead, he OD'd one year ago. It's not rebelling. You probably haven't had low-energy consciousness parents that you had to build a wall to not be hurt by them. Don't confuse rebelling with being wiser and putting yourself first even if that means not fixing culture's norms of family 'obligations'. Chances are, You probably haven't drove your parent to go pick-up heroin before going to school.

After trying Ketamine some times I always was skeptical that helps depression.... I don't think its the best chem for that. I still the think the most useful substances for non treatable depression is moderate-big dose of LSD or Psylicibin

You are just sheep of the system. I have trascended the word "maturity". Maturity is for boring sad adults. Maturity just means you settle down with life and bought the guilt game the religion matrix set up for you. Sorry, you think you are smart, but you are just a sheep. Sadghuru is 65. Ask him about maturity. He will laugh in your face of how boring and lame you became.

Don't overthink it. Just do 8 hour fast to make sure your stomach is 100% empty. That's it. @Alex_R That´s not true. Coffee or any stimulant impairs sensitivity pranic and energy system for profound and subtle experiences of consciousness. The more clear the mind is, the better.

I'm beginning to actually have fun flirting, I didn't think this was actually possible. I grew up with basic stage orange pick-up teaching that flirting its a technique with steps you have to do like a cold technique, but imo this is such a lame way to flirt. I get that it can get results but people don't know what flirting is until you get enough comfortable within yourself that you actually enjoy flirting with the girl. At that point it really doesn't matter the outcome, since you are having fun, that's the whole point. Ironically at this point (the point of not caring at all, or flirting just happening spontaneously within you) gets a tremendous positive feedback from women. It's a complex topic, but in a weird way it's like the other person reads up your relaxation and playfulness and that becomes in itself what attracts the other person. The negative point is that you can't really control it, there will be some days that really fun and bright interactions happen, and others that absolutely nothing happens.

Saw it coming. This is actually good for him.

I wouldn't say he seems like he has aged. He looks like more pale but that could be the webcam/video lighting. He definitely looks more serious, colder, less warm Guru aurea.

nothing as far as im concerned

damn ok thanks for making me feel bad now lmao

Hahahaha then if we can make it to day 6 I would call that a victory

I wonder if someone has done this...I think it would be a wacky and interest experience, 7 days in a cabin with your girl but no talking whatsoever. Not a single word allowed! Of course you can't do this with any girl, it must be someone that you have particular affinity and connection Imagine probably the incredible sex that would happen too...

Just thought I would share the joy of freedom with my fellow actualizers! I'm so full of energy. Feels good to defeat and let go another addiction of the mind. It seems one gets stronger and stronger in life (I quit cigarettes in the past), each time one chooses for true consciousness, instead of the false security and avoidance of life addictions are rooted in. Feels good to get back a clear mind and see life more clearly, after 3ish years of the opiate seduction & delusion. Not coming back, I wish all of those fighting habituations and addictions good luck...remember that if you are moving towards the truth, light, consciousness, you are doing the wise thing. Your soul knows better than your mind.

That's so good.

Good work, but I'm sure losing your virginity to such a cool girl that afterwards fucked you in the ass contributed to to that afterflowing lasting happiness you talk about.

Oh no, you are the child by showing that cockyness behind a screen. ? Thanks!

Not more than 15gr probably. That was very rare though, I would say the media must been around 10gr the last couple of years.

It's definitely on my to-do list. I hope I find the one.

All of this to show us that you have a BMW? ?

The ego usually plays a game: It likes to imagine itself like he can "catch" experiences of Awakening/Enlightment/NonDuality/Love/Consciosuness...etc after they had passed, the Consciousness, if its not aware enough, might "believe" this mind ideas and thoughts might be actual Love/Experience, and this the terrible mistake. Thinking "you got it" its terrible for you. Please let go of this. This just creates suffering because is indeed an attachment and it's just shows once again that the ego is the enemy of the fundamental skill of "letting go". This topic might be controversial for some people here but the more time it passes, the more I am clear that no intellectualization or conclusion about spirit/Reality/You/God should happen. All ideas and concepts the moment you catch them let them go as fast as you can. Because they are just thoughts and ideas! That is rubbish, you don't want that. You want ACTUAL EXPERIENCE. Ideas and conclusions are not only not the goal, but a distraction. I know this might make me hated here but that's my view. In the big scheme of things, I am just sharing this so everybody can move closer to God and higher state of Awareness. If that means that these message its not going to be popular or liked at first, then I'm fine with it. Peace.

Yeap... And I would say that is even more wacky than that, you are so sovereign that you even create that story to not feel that alone. Since nothing or nobody can argue you (because you have all responsibility and Truth authority since you are alone) then you can totally do it. One or several the truth is nobody will ever be able to separate you from yourself so you are totally God in your own creation and fuck it you are here for ever. Who cares if there are other infinities. Fuck them ?

There is no space nor time. All is collapsed into Infinity.

You wouldn't ask that question if there would have been a permanent baseline clear awakening. So keep working, to be really awake 24/7.