Preety_India

About passive aggressive guys. How should I deal with passive aggressive kind of dudes. (the following is also the reason why I experience a lot of anxiety around men) I have often run into situations in life where a guy would initially act very decent and polite and nice with me. And then he would get closer and closer. Like not necessarily physically closer but get too flirtatious and soon it would turn into sexist jokes or sexual lewd lascivious comments. Then it would almost feel like he is raping me through words. And it would get uncomfortable and I would start to step away or resist his behavior or tell him to back off. The next time I would observe that this same guy would then create some drama around me and try to hurt me mentally/emotionally because I didn't give into him. Like for example if I was studying at a place, he would turn everyone against me. If I was working at a place, he would turn the boss against me so that I get fired from the job. I think you get my point. It's passive aggressive behavior. I saw that often times whenever I rejected a guy's sexual interest(even if it was a passing interest), and no matter how politely I did that, he would have some resentment towards me later and he would use that resentment to play power games with me to punish me sort of for brushing off his advances. How should I effectively deal with such behavior? What can I do to stay mentally safe in such situations? Thanks.

@Gianna thank you Gianna. Your reply relaxed me so much. I was feeling like a weirdo for a while and Whew okay glad to hear, I was like.. am I losing my mind

dealing-with-passive-aggressive-behaviors education-what-did-i-learn-today sexual-fantasy march-1-to-march-8

What would you call a guy who resents the fact that I rejected him and then goes and lies to the boss about me or creates some drama to get me fired from the job somehow or turns people against me to make sure that i lose any benefits or tarnish my reputation on purpose? What do you label this behavior as?

@puporing yup

I'm fed up with this forum. At some point Leo will have to beg people to come back here. I'm withdrawing all my topics from the forum. Because somebody always comes and gaslights your thread instead of actually helping in a productive way. Every thread turns into a triggerfest. Every one gets gaslighted. There's too much bias on this forum and little accountability. Even Raptorsin7 got gaslighted in one of the threads and he was gaslighted so much and so often. It was unbearable. Someone opens up about their deep problems possibly to help themselves and others, and they get pathetically gaslighted to oblivion. Instead of focusing on the problem, the person is made into a problem.. No... People come here to seek help not to look at your display of superiority. Enough with this dogshit. It's very depressing. A good resource gets wasted like this and those who are vocal about it are always bashed. A mod here completely ruined my thread with his bias. The dating section is a literal hell hole for women. Women go there and get gaslighted for even minor complaints. Passive aggressive is this forum nothing else. FUCK THIS SHIT. This whole forum is a big hypocrite. They talk about big big things like stage Turquoise, spiral dynamics, enlightenment, love, neo-advaita, achieving high consciousness but there is no humanity here. There is no love or empathy or understanding here. People play power games - you better or me better games. Everyone is trying to dog each other out. There is no harmony here. There is no peace. Very little tolerance if any. And full of academic losers. On every thread you see a super rude hurtful comment and this is even mods doing it. Then when you challenge it, you are gaslighted into thinking that you did something wrong by challenging the established status quo here like some goddamn hypocritical bureaucracy. Where's the love? What do we call that game? RUSSIAN ROULETTE? this is a Russian roulette bureaucracy.

Decided to abandon this thread out of forum frustration. Conqueror fantasies....... I don't know why I have all these conqueror fantasies but they seem to be stemming from my need to complete myself.. It's like I'm the one half that needs the other half to complete me. My half represents submission and surrender whereas the other half should be about domination and control and passion. When these two meet, I feel like it's fireworks. I only feel relaxed and fully complete when these two sides merge within me sexually and romantically. It's like I'm always looking for the conqueror archetype. Is this a specific female fantasy created through brain wiring or is it unique to me and you have never heard someone have these before. I want the guy I love to fully conquer and own me and make me his till the end of eternity. This romance or thirst to never end. I always wish to be in a state of mystic surrender emotionally, mentally and spiritually. Do you want your other half to be exactly like you or do you want the other half to complete you. Do you feel a natural thirst romantically. Are these fantasies only fantasies or do they exist to serve an internal purpose of spiritual and emotional fulfillment? Or is such fulfillment just a futile passion that's not worth pursuing/seeking? I know the questions and the thoughts behind them are very ambiguous yet fantasies themselves are such an ambiguous part of human sexual side, some people would want to die for their fantasies, holding them dear to death whereas some people dismiss them as futile imaginations of a hyper creative mind that would look good only on paper, not in reality, how much of life is real, how much of it mimics art and fiction, too many questions, too few answers. Fantasies represent a mysterious side of human phenomenon

@NoSelfSelf thanks for the consideration.

@NoSelfSelf So some random shitty guy decided to misbehave with me, it's my fault that he chose me and not another victim! You're kidding me man.

Nice topic

Dude, nice topic.

I don't know why I have all these conqueror fantasies but they seem to be stemming from my need to complete myself.. It's like I'm the one half that needs the other half to complete me. My half represents submission and surrender whereas the other half should be about domination and control and passion. When these two meet, I feel like it's fireworks. I only feel relaxed and fully complete when these two sides merge within me sexually and romantically. It's like I'm always looking for the conqueror archetype. Is this a specific female fantasy created through brain wiring or is it unique to me and you have never heard someone have these before. I want the guy I love to fully conquer and own me and make me his till the end of eternity. This romance or thirst to never end. I always wish to be in a state of mystic surrender emotionally, mentally and spiritually. Do you want your other half to be exactly like you or do you want the other half to complete you. Do you feel a natural thirst romantically. Are these fantasies only fantasies or do they exist to serve an internal purpose of spiritual and emotional fulfillment? Or is such fulfillment just a futile passion that's not pursuing/seeking? I know the questions and the thoughts behind them are very ambiguous yet fantasies themselves are such an ambiguous part of human sexual side, some people would want to die for their fantasies, holding them dear to death whereas some people dismiss them as futile imaginations of a hyper creative mind that would look good only on paper, not in reality, how much of life is real, how much of it mimics art and fiction, too many questions, too few answers. Fantasies represent a mysterious side of human phenomenon..

@mysticalninja how much time does it take for a sprained leg to heal?

I think what I'm looking for is conquer and surrender..

I never want anyone to suffer in life no matter what. But I have social calibration issues.

Sometimes I like sexual tension and conflict. It creates some resistance. Like hate fucking. Like I just want to be hated and then fucked.

Exactly what these people don't get it is that so many surgeries are botched, no joke. We aren't celebrities and even celebrities get have their surgeries botched. It's not harmless.

Oh wow, thank you so much, I'll definitely get those today.

Yes yes yes yes.... I totally forgot the social component. Thanks for bringing that up.

Which one do you recommend Miss Purple?

Shit I have been ignoring this coughing that's been going on. I really need to do something about it.

I agree.

@Loba can you enlist some coral traits like in bullet points? Really needed them for my journal

I'm feeling so horny right now. UGH. I just want to be penetrated so hard.