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Everything posted by Preety_India

  1. Since I have been digging into Shiva (especially Mahakaala who I consider my personal protector ) and Vishnu (my divine protector), I scrambled for hours looking for some simple mantra chants with English translation. Decided to share. Enjoy Mahakaala
  2. I've been doing a lot of caffeine since one week. I noticed that my mind becomes sharper and randomly comes up with insights about my past and current life events. Stuff I could not access before. It gave me greater clarity Anyone who did similar things or had a similar experience on caffeine? It did impact sleep
  3. A part of me enjoys all the girly makeup but not all the time.
  4. Am I the only person who thinks that music can have deep impact on our brain chemistry. What are your experiences when you listen to music?
  5. Describe your value system and state your top 10 values in order of priority?
  6. This journal is complete. This is the last entry in my journal. With that said, I close this journal in peace. The next men I met were absolute gentleman and I have nothing bad to say about them. They treated me well and for some unlikely reasons things didn't work. But I absolutely cherish the relationships I had with them. They were Marcel and Benton. Marcel treated me like a princess. It helped me get over the trauma somewhat. Benton treated me well and I was very happy with him as long as the relationship lasted. I am still trying to get over him and after meeting Benton I haven't felt like being attracted to any other guy ever since. I just lost attraction for men after him. He is the last guy I fell in love with(after meeting him I don't feel like liking any other guy anymore) and I am not looking to date men anymore. This was it.
  7. @Michael Jackson do not comment in my journals again.
  8. @Vincent S yoohoo. Got it today. Drank it with a smoothie. A bit bitter.
  9. My third boyfriend Joseph September last week 2020.. Joseph used to never be this cold towards me. Something was off. If we fought we really fought bad. He said to me - I love you but this is not working. But he used to say "I love you" only if he wanted to win me back. This time he didn't do anything to win me back. He wasn't trying to make up with me. I was a bit nervous and upset. Constantly waiting for something from him. Some closure. Nothing. No reasons given. Other than just that he loves me. Then one day I scrolled through his Facebook and saw that he had been interacting with some girl. I saw that these interactions went back as far as the early days of August. I confronted Joseph on this. What was all this about? Joseph told me that he had been cheating on me with this girl since the past few months. That broke my heart. I never expected that. I told Joseph that cheating was the last thing I could take. I told him that I was never going to take him back.. Joseph said "I still love you Babloo." And I said 'no Joseph no. I can't. " It was over at last..
  10. You're still following my journal though
  11. @Michael Jackson stop talking about me and stop commenting on me and leave me alone. Leo already told you to drop it
  12. @Gesundheit2 stop the triggering and GET FUCKING LOST. DON'T COMMENT ON ME ANYMORE. JUST STOP
  13. How can I have in dark mode? I tried fiddling around with this website but don't see any option anywhere! Ahm i changed the setting on my Google Chrome but that only changes the background for Google not for this site. I want Dark mode while reading forum. How can I do that? Any tips?
  14. @Razard86 In reality you don't even have a single girlfriend. Get off
  15. And why the hell do you think she has Borderline Personality Disorder??
  16. One day all you people will drive me insane. The last thing a BPD wants to deal with is awkwardness and lack of respect.
  17. @Razard86 you talk too much about gaming. It's kinda toxic. Because gaming is playfulness only when it's a dance that comes from Authenticity. Any other game is an ego game that will eventually hurt. I think I agree with @NoSelfSelf
  18. The personal messenger is open for you. Use that maybe??? You're either a mental case or you're on drugs I don't even want my journal followed.
  19. @Razard86 I kinda agree with @zurew you don't make any sense.
  20. Falling for scandalous gurus and their manipulation Trying supplements that don't work or are risky Trying unknown psychedelics and suffering loss of cognition Trying psychedelics without reading safety warnings Not able to connect with reality after following solipsism shit Hero worshipping gurus to the point of blindness. Guilt tripping normies Spiritual bypassing Spiritual dick measuring contest - "I'm more spiritual than you" Not using spirituality to increase love for others, but only boosting one's own ego, flexing. Not using spirituality in a practical sense Making mockery of core spiritual teachings Starting unnecessary fights with other spiritual seekers Going on and on about neo advaita without being logical
  21. Suffering withdrawal symptoms when guru is not around.
  22. Aye, @Leo Gura should probably marry teal He talks too much about her. *jelly feels