Preety_India

I want to ask you a question. Are you concentrating a bit too hard during your meditation? Meditation is an immersive experience, so it has to be mostly effortless, like jumping into ocean waves, if you tried to force a meditation state or experience, it can become a boomerang and fly back at you. Instead of creating the normal feeling of calm and relaxation and immersion, it can create discomfort progressively over time, even inducing a panic attack causing the heart rate to skyrocket. If you force yourself to look at an object too hard and too long, your eye pupils will dilate, a condition that induces the autonomous nervous system to start accumulating adrenaline by jacking up the adrenal reflex and suddenly, without you realizing, your body is getting ready for flight or fight response. This used to happen to me in the beginning. I started doing Transcendental Meditation which is basically free flowing and relaxing and doesn't cause fear panic or anxiety during meditation. Meditation should always be a good experience. So if you are experiencing bad symptoms either it could be that you are forcing it too much, out of some obligation to do it or it could be that over time your brain has subconsciously attached the idea of meditation to fear and hence everytime you sit down, the fear clock starts ticking slowly and ultimately gives the heart attack feeling. Start with slow doses of meditation. Condition your mind by auto suggestion that there is nothing to fear. After that, slightly correct your practice. Your meditation should feel natural and harmonious. It should feel effortless and calming. Also don't worry about the time that you meditation. It's the quality of your meditation that matters. High quality 5 minutes meditation is better than 1 hour forced low quality distracted meditation. High quality meditation should immediately make you feel at peace with yourself, the way you would feel after a heavy cardio. Check your meditation method and switch it to your needs and also change your mental state before every session. It's called a warm up. Prepare your mind to think that it is good and peaceful. Then your fear will automatically resolve itself Remove the thought from your mind about genetic or hereditary heart disease. You are paralyzing yourself with fear. Even if you are getting a heart attack, you can't help yourself during it, someone else has to help you, you probably wouldn't even be conscious to actually feel it, so worrying about something you have no control over is plain stupidity and inviting more trouble. Remove such intrusive invasive thoughts immediately. The very goal of meditation is to remove and cleanse such intrusive thoughts from the mind You are doing the exact opposite. Cultivate the feminine in you, remove the controlling masculine force that is invading rather than calming, let the feminine side in you calm you down just before meditation and take it cool calm and easy during your meditation session.

In this journal I'm going to work towards my journey of self actualization. It's a work in progress.

@electroBeam I want to ask you a question. Are you concentrating a bit too hard during your meditation? Meditation is an immersive experience, so it has to be mostly effortless, like jumping into ocean waves, if you tried to force a meditation state or experience, it can become a boomerang and fly back at you. Instead of creating the normal feeling of calm and relaxation and immersion, it can create discomfort progressively over time, even inducing a panic attack causing the heart rate to skyrocket. If you force yourself to look at an object too hard and too long, your eye pupils will dilate, a condition that induces the autonomous nervous system to start accumulating adrenaline by jacking up the adrenal reflex and suddenly, without you realizing, your body is getting ready for flight or fight response. This used to happen to me in the beginning. I started doing Transcendental Meditation which is basically free flowing and relaxing and doesn't cause fear panic or anxiety during meditation. Meditation should always be a good experience. So if you are experiencing bad symptoms either it could be that you are forcing it too much, out of some obligation to do it or it could be that over time your brain has subconsciously attached the idea of meditation to fear and hence everytime you sit down, the fear clock starts ticking slowly and ultimately gives the heart attack feeling. Start with slow doses of meditation. Condition your mind by auto suggestion that there is nothing to fear. After that, slightly correct your practice. Your meditation should feel natural and harmonious. It should feel effortless and calming. Also don't worry about the time that you meditation. It's the quality of your meditation that matters. High quality 5 minutes meditation is better than 1 hour forced low quality distracted meditation. High quality meditation should immediately make you feel at peace with yourself, the way you would feel after a heavy cardio. Check your meditation method and switch it to your needs and also change your mental state before every session. It's called a warm up. Prepare your mind to think that it is good and peaceful. Then your fear will automatically resolve itself Remove the thought from your mind about genetic or hereditary heart disease. You are paralyzing yourself with fear. Even if you are getting a heart attack, you can't help yourself during it, someone else has to help you, you probably wouldn't even be conscious to actually feel it, so worrying about something you have no control over is plain stupidity and inviting more trouble. Remove such intrusive invasive thoughts immediately. The very goal of meditation is to remove and cleanse such intrusive thoughts from the mind You are doing the exact opposite. Cultivate the feminine in you, remove the controlling masculine force that is invading rather than calming, let the feminine side in you calm you down just before meditation and take it cool calm and easy during your meditation session.

I can finally be at peace with myself again after the storm. My alter ego Mujer Guardiana is happy seeing me happy. She is probably saying to me.. Good job girl, good job.

I've finally discovered my alter-ego after a lot of soul searching. I have decided to name her Mujer Guardiana. And this is how she looks. I have selected 3 avatars for her. Here she is ready with her sword to take on the battles of everyday. I'm mostly going to use the first avatar for her. She is my guardian angel. My alter ego that calms me when I need her. Of course these are all imaginary things but I like having a virtual reality self image that mimics me but also has other attributes that I would pick and select. I'm not that masculine so I would want Mujer Guardiana to be more fierce and masculine than me. She is a protector.

I can hardly wait to be myself. He was always trying to commodify me but I learned how to control the narrative.

I promise to keep this journal very beautiful as a tribute to my awesome wonderful hero. A beautiful tribute to a beautiful soul.

Sorry but that's not how people perceive Actualized.org. There are many people who understand the value of the website and Leo's teachings and this guy is not one of them. His explanation is stupid and obnoxious. His followers must also be like him. He is too myopic to understand spirituality. He is one of those people who criticize for the sake of criticizing. Big thumbs down to his video.

I have very few friends that I call my true friends. I don't care too much about friends. Most people like to flaunt them. I don't. Be happy with yourself.

Whats this phantom pain? I know what it means but which part of your body is experiencing pain? This is the strangest thing.

Visualization should also be a part of koyosta.

A little bit of fun.

When you feel like you are losing your self A radial gaussian blur beautifully captures the moment when you feel like you are losing your sense of self.. When you feel like that, life can take you anywhere. Try not to get lost into the darkness of life. Be a winner. Be a survivor. Nothing stops you.. Build your bridge and build your home with your own hands. Celebrate your strength. So when things fall apart you still have you. Life is never promised You might feel bad now. But there is always light at the end of every tunnel.

Meditation, self-inquiry, WHM, yoga, journaling, reading, eating healthy, shadow work, having a vision.

Taken from a post.. I would like to prescribe some things. 30 min of meditation 20 min of kriya yoga 10 min Wim Hoff method (optional) 20 min of journalling 20 min Affirmation and visualization Clean diet and detoxification Making friends (few but rewarding friendships) At lease ONE of these or ALL of these for best results over time.. Gradually implement each of the following. 2.5 hours to 3 hours working in yourself. It's quite a lot of time which means that these dosages are quite large . Find the one thing that works for you and do it. Imagine you could feel so much better on the inside with these techniques and function like a self actualised person. But 3 hours a day is not easy so start with one thing it may take even a year to implement all these things but when you do it imagine what it would be like to have clarity of thought and physical readiness in everything yoh do.

Number 1 rule.. Be extremely extremely patient. Fruits of patience are sweet.

My imagination has no bounds. I am creative with my mind. It sometimes helps because it's an escape from reality. I'm still trying to improve my writing skills.. The last week I was toying with the idea of elves. I had looked up some channels on YouTube and read a bit about them and all I know now, that I wish I was an elf.. I would want things to be a certain way in my world of virtual reality. I want to be dressed a particular way when I am an elf.. I have come up with some ideas for my dress while searching around for it. Shopping for dress ideas. Lol So here are a quick exhibits, how I would want to be dressed in my Elf incarnation/avatar.. When I'm being a war nymph, trying to defend my territory from enemies I want to be dressed like this. When I'm walking deep into the woods and all the greenery and heavy bushes and trees, I just want to keep it simple with twigs and leaves all over my dress. When it's forest fires and blazing hot I want to wear something that offers protection from burns and injuries more like an Armour. When I'm in the mountains calling out all the goats and sheep, I want to carry a beautiful Indian flute with me, it's magical to play a flute in the mountains and also I want to wear those boots. When I'm in my forest enclosure, I would prefer some fancy pink. I would want to entertain my friends with some hip shaking and Indian jewelry. When I'm walking around lakes and ponds and streams and rivers, I want to feel like an aqua queen in this dress. This will be my winter dress. Nice and comfy. Warm. This one is beautiful. When I'm having a casual evening walk through the woods using my magical athame on collective beings and sprinkling my magic on them, I would dress up this way.

This dream was very weird I was living in a dorm but I had left that place. I came back to get some remaining items from the room I see a woman living next door and she smiles at me and I smile back at her. Then we get chatty. Suddenly she is rude and I have no clue. I just say Nevermind and go back to my room. I see these large rods, they don't fit on my door so I keep them on her door. She opens her door and she sees me and tells me to get them removed. I explain her the problem but she is adamant.. So I get them removed. I come back to my room. So I start photographing the whole room. Because it looks so beautiful. I was really clumsy when I used to live there. But the dorm girls who came to live there after me have kept it really cool. It looks really small so any kind of decor is just impossible. But these girls did a good job. They have put flower pots on the bedside, very fashionable and these pink dahlia like flowers bring a charm to the room. Next I see they have put some conical pots on the large window in a beautiful array. I'm trying to take pictures of all of them and I want to get out of that place. Legally I'm not supposed to be there because the lease has ended but I have to pick up some stuff I left.. These girls are so kind. They left my stuff on the left side of the table undisturbed and neatly in a bunch. It's easier for me to just pick and throw that stuff into my bag. Now I'm returning back in a cab and I check my phone and my friends have sent me a hundred different pictures of different things. Omg I'm like I can't believe it.. It's my birthday and they really did care to make it special. End of the dream.

Some concepts I'm going to talk about... Architecture and perception Transforming myself into an elf ...... On another note, this is very sad ...... And this is ridiculous in the name of religion

YouTube went bazooka...

@28 cm unbuffed It's good to be ambitious. But I think you're taking a lot on your plate. I know it's difficult to draw a line. Let the obsession be in doses. So you are obsessed only when you need it to progress. It's like the saying "All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy" Right now you're on mental steroids. You are super excited to achieve everything. But slow down. It can consume you. Tao is very good for balance. When you have to take a break, focus on the break, not on progress. Never think that you are missing out on something. You are never missing out on anything, it's only a mind trick. Learn to break your mental pattern. When you need the motivation, let the obsession come back. Keep a cycle. A cycle of progress and a cycle of slowing down. This way it becomes rhythmic and gets automatically balanced out. Waxing waning type.

I think you're dealing with a turmoil period. Can be incredibly frustrating. You are showing existential crisis symptoms. You're possibly looking for a structure or framework or a launchpad in life. It will neither come easy nor will it come any sooner. You need to slowly build your base to grow from, your substratum. Take it easy. Don't be upset because of the frustration. This frustration is necessary for some time to learn certain skills and to learn acceptance of failures in life. People who bypass this stage think that life is always perfect and therefore they can never actually face life when things go wrong. This period of frustration and uncertainty is a necessary conditioning to be able accept life in its full form. So don't feel bad if you are going through this. One thing you really need to do is let go of perfection completely. There will be obsessive thoughts about perfection. Detach that thought. Don't wait for a perfect time or perfect day for things to be perfect. Accept the imperfection of a day.. Keep a dream board. Also keep strict focus all the time on things that are really essential for your growth. But allocate your time properly. Like for example don't use all your time to learn about life purpose or dating or spirituality. Dedicate certain amounts of time. Use your important time for job skills and health related stuff. Do not take everything at one time, as a perfectionist you might feel like time is too short, but take it easy, there's a ton of time. Focus on balance. Try to keep a proper balance between all aspects of your life. Don't exercise too much. Don't distract too much. Everything in balance. Also be very positive. Perfectionists might assume the future to be negative. Remove that negativity. Calm your mind with positive hope.. Think that everything is going to get fixed eventually. One of the problems that I can see in your post is that you are too attached to your life. If you are passionate person, this is expected. However being so attached can create a ton of frustration and can be a constant source of torment. So detach. Learn to let go. Learn to be free of everything. Have focus when you need it but during other times learn to be just be free of all thoughts. Otherwise they will consume you. So the key points are Focus Accept imperfections Dreamboard as a base or framework Allocate time properly Think using abundance. Think there is lot of time Keep Balance Be positive Learn to be free

Animals have a higher level of intuition as compared to humans. Mind over matter. Can we influence matter with mind. The phenomenon of spontaneous human combustion, is it psychological or biological. You can hold a lecture on biofeedback technology... Mind over matter techniques used in biofeedback Look into this video for accompanying your studies ,

I had a dream about Selena Gomez and I was talking to a pharmacist in the dream. I gave them a few books and they kept it on their shelves. Selena Gomez's songs were playing in the background. I heard the song Broken Dreams being played over and over. I met a friend later and she put my head in her lap and I was listening to the Selena Gomez song. I was having an unnerving feeling with this song like it's a sad song and not giving me a good feeling. Dream abruptly cuts. I tried to look up this song on Google and there's no such song by Selena Gomez anywhere. Weird!

In another journal I wrote about koyosta. I define it as a way of living in which you take full responsibility for yourself. You fight for things. You develop your own survival and protection skills instead of blaming and lamenting your situations and conditions. Instead of seeing something as a source of depression and frustration and fear and stress see it as a source of fight to gain survival and breakthrough. Every minor or major obstacle or depressing or stressing thing can be considered as breakthrough. You just have to either jump through it and tolerate without getting impacted or bypass it I'll call this the koyosta method. It also means positivity and empowerment.