traveler

Hope is food for the ego. It's always looking for fulfilment in the future. And yes the ego will seek hopelessness if it thinks that it will bring it "liberation"

Can you point out what was untrue in my statement?

The ego can't cease seeking, it is the seeking energy itself. The path is utterly hopeless. The ego will turn non seeking into seeking. There is nothing the ego can do, absolutely nothing. It goes around in a circle. There is no final destination, there is no "there." Nobody is "there." Nothing is "here."

That's beautifully written. I really resonate with what you are saying, even though it sounds like your experience is many times more intense than mine. I'm 20 years old myself and have been going through some disorientation for a while after realizing my true nature. Finding meaning in maximizing bliss within myself is very beautiful. Perfect response to the freedom/infinite prison question, beautifully put!

This is some deep stuff haha. How is life going for Ethan? Does he have a hard time finding meaning in his relative life with the knowledge that "he" possesses? How does he have any motivation to do anything, get up in the morning, work, have relationships etc.? I guess if this is all that he has ever known, that he has been moved by god since he could remember and doesn't have the day to day experience of a normal human being, the experience of a doer? Would you call what you experience freedom or love, or would you call it an unescapable infinite prison? You don't need to call it either of those haha. Are the teachings of well known spiritual teachers like Rupert Spira, Adyashanti or Eckhart Tolle, too basic for you. Are you beyond the understanding of the enlightened beings of our plane of existence?

This sounds like something I experienced very vividly once too. after a psychedelic flashback on weed it felt like I had woken up to the total meaninglessness and unreality of our human experience, it felt like a very very deep existential depression, existential suffering, that there was nowhere to go nowhere to escape. I saw people from an aliens perspective, I had lost myself completely and cried to my sister and told her that I had seen something that I could not unsee, that I had awoken to a part of reality that I was not supposed to awaken to. I'm still struggling with the meaninglessness to this day. No motivations to do anything, can't get myself to find a job, I still have a very hard time being a normal human being and lose a lot of energy just trying to be normal. The losing of myself into my infinite being is happening gradually, and I have an intuition that it is the very act of trying to hold on that causes the deep and depressing feelings of hopelessness and meaninglessness. The fear and deep sorrow of losing the illusions of friendship, family, the future, meaning. I have had very profound awakenings into our true nature, and I can say for sure that THIS RIGHT HERE RIGHT NOW is it. All of the fear, grief, loss, feelings of meaninglessness does not touch what we are. All there is, is what we are. What we are is intimately involved but at the same time untouched. What are you trying to hold on to? Why are you afraid? Drop your ideas and be with me. Find peace in not knowing.

I actually sampled this video some months ago and made a song. Very intriguing watching people from that time taking psychedelics.

I am enlightened

Thought I would share this gem with those of you who haven't seen it. Watch it all the way through, it's amazing. If you wanna share similar videoes, I would be more than happy to watch them.

@Aakash That is really interesting and all, but how do you feel? Why don't you start where you're at? Your experience right now in this moment is all that you have. Mahasamadhi is a concept in your mind. Why would you need to shed your body to be what you are?

Do you understand absolute truth? Does anybody? Are you talking from truth? From experience? Or are you just copying the words of masters who have said all of the things that you keep mentioning? Have you come to grips with the self-reference problem?

!!!!!VIEWER DISCRETION IS ADVISED!!!!! I thought I would share this, as I found it very interesting. It's a buddhist monk Quang Duc who let himself on fire in protest to South Vietnamese Diem regime’s pro-catholic policies and discriminatory Buddhist laws in 1963. The level of consciousness it takes to remain still while burning alive is unimaginable. (if this is against the forums guidelines by all means delete this post. I'm very fascinated by this and thought I would share it with people who I think will be too. But it may be too sensitive material.)

Very bizarre and interesting animation style, I liked it. I'll check some of his other stuff out. Thanks for sharing! Edit: Oh he's the creator of salad fingers. That's a classic.

Is it necessary to have a spiritual teacher for the clearing of your awakening, or should it be enough doing work yourself with help from guru's/teachers on the internet?

Great question. It's like the zen koan "If a tree falls in a forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?" Cant answer it though.. So bump

Be careful about seeking the experience you had. The ego can very quickly take credit for the experience and make it into another search. This was an actuality for me when I broke through to God. My ego conceptualized my experience and I believed it, then went on searching for about 6 months to get the experience back, until I realized a truth that was inherent in the mystical experience itself: That this right now is it. This is the experience you're supposed to be having right now, always. God is always with you, even when it seems that you lost him. I'm not saying that will happen to you, but I have heard it is a pretty common thing. Just a heads up. And thank You for your post, beautiful insights.

You talked about this stuff in elementary school?

One of those animals might end up looking pretty thicc after a couple hundred of years of banging your perfect 10 girl.

Funny. I had this thing with my friends, when we used to smoke weed, where we gave cars names depending on what we sensed from their "personality." Never thought about it until now, but it was always a very fun time. So are you having conversations with inanimate objects on the daily? You might not wanna tell anybody about that, besides this forum and your friends that are into this kind of stuff, lol. They may get a bit concerned

It is possible to get deep insights and knowledge about our true nature. The way to understand is to dissolve totally into your infinite being. In that state the knowledge is there for you, but for you only. There is no way to take infinite understanding into the finite mind. This is one of the main insights I had when I dissolved into myself.

I had a full body massage yesterday with the intention of healing some energy blockages. It was wonderful, but halfway through I felt the blood starting to rush into my lil king down there, as she was touching some very sensitive areas. What I was unaware of was that a full body massage also includes the front. She asked me to lay on my back and I naturally got very aware of my wood down there, and that there was absolutely no way that she wouldn't notice. Throughout the rest of the session I could not think about anything else than getting rid of my wood, I tried all of the methods I've been using during self Inquiry "Who is the one having a boner," and " "surrender into the experience" etc. And all of this was of course resistance. It didn't go away throughout the rest of the session. Might not be an enlightenment joke, but it surely was an embarrassing/funny twist that initially was supposed to be something "spiritual."

Seeing ego's from the perspective of God is a very amusing thing. It surely is paradise when you find out that it is all you.

I'm looking for books that can help me orient myself a little in this disorienting place that I am at this current moment. I've read adyashanti's "the end of your world," and I'm interested in similar books. Thanks.

No I have not. But I've heard of it and I am considering buying it. Have you read it? I can see that there is different interpretations of the book. Could you recommend one?