Grant NZ

It is absolutely amazing as I am right now experiencing the truth of Leos teachings, what I have learnt through my own experience and from other teachers, all coming together. Leo has resonated with me a lot, but I did not know he was resonating with me, I thought my ego was just interested in the information. Until recently when I watched his part 2 awakening video and he said that you know that what I am speaking is the truth deep within you. And for the first time I actually looked within me. My ego had always thought that the stuff sounds pretty far fetched, but the more I have watched the more I have wanted to believe him, but I have always told myself to get the basics right, and the fundamental is to never believe in anything. I noticed that when I watched his videos my ego is trying to not get me to pay attention, and for the first time I looked passed my ego and actually noticed deep within an intense feeling when watching his awakening video. I have had to do alot of internal work to get to this point, but I know that if I had never stumbled onto Leo on YouTube five years ago, I probably would never have gotten this far. I know not to overhype anything as it is all orchestrated for you to wake up more, but it is nice for others to hear more confidence in a teacher and I can say that Leo's no bullshit approach is critical for this work. For a while now I have been able to raise my level of love but I have always believed that I have failed because I begin to experience tension and pain within myself. What I now can see is that in this moment it is not tension and pain, it is love hahaha. Every sensation I have ever had is just love. I believed it was pain because I believe that I have a body and that a body should not experience those sensations. All of the emotional trauma that I had stored in me was just stuff that my ego told me I should not be experiencing. It is extremely clever and sophisticated and extremely beautiful to see once you become aware of it. I know not to give any judgement to where I am currently at in this journey, and to stay humble. I just felt compelled to send this message, hopefully mostly out of love, since I have been through a significant elevation in consciousness recently. ❤️

@Nahm OK thank you.

@Nahm No I haven't gone through the tortures, but I believe that in my mind these are the worst things we could confront. I can confront imagined pain in my mind and this actually helps me to deal with physical pain better. Such as pain from fatigue and exercising. If my mind is ready for it then it doesn't react to it so much.

@Nahm Could you happily go through hours on end of having an knife stabbed all over your body?

I'd first like to make my intentions clear, I am only searching for how to bring the best out of myself and everyone else. It seems like actualized.org and spirituality is really beating around the bush. I would really like for a bunch of people to completely show me how unconscious I am with what I have to say. We all know what life's greatest fear is, but we are all avoiding it. I even typed the word into the search bar in the forums and not one post was dedicated to this word. Pain. It is ridiculous how clear it is to me that you are all avoiding this thing, including myself. At this point in time pain is the great master over humanity. Why has Leo not yet dedicated many episodes to dealing with this subject? For me everything else is trivial. I care much less about whether I'm neurotic etc, whether I have a fantastic business. Just teach me how to actually deal with the worst atrociousities that can be committed to the human body. If you could teach this one thing then I am happy. I will work on all of your cute little teachings about making a cute little life. I've experienced the fear of my ego going through dieing, not full ego death. I continuouly face my worst fears and grow from them. I have become a much better version of myself, I am very happy with who I am. I would be happy to go through the rest of life never developing any more, even though I will keep developing. I have no question that Leo and many others have gone through alot more deeper spiritual development then I have and have faced fear on another level than I have. Yes this is my ego talking, if you remove ego then there is no more fear of pain. Yes you can remove all resistance to pain, but it doesn't matter if you realize that you are the only being in existence or not, pain still exists. Even if you realize god and are completely present this will not change the fact that pain exists. If you have no ego you may not react, but you will still feel pain exactly the same. Above all else I have been training myself to deal with pain. I can run much further and endure much greater muscle pain than I ever have been able to. Why are there no teachings on dealing with pain? Actualized.org is providing many teachings that are rare within society and claiming to be a no bull shit channel. Then why is it failing to deal with the most difficult thing that a human being could confront? Why hide from this by promoting ways to get ahead and build an amazing life? Should this not be dealt with first? Get the most difficult things out of the way so then the rest of life will become much easier. Do you think that Leo could sit there with the same smugness while a wire is slowly being inserted through his left ear and out each of his eyeballs while the episode goes ahead? I would hate to see this happen to him because I love him and all he has done. But do we really think he can deal with this? I respect all he has to say, but it is just talk at the end of the day. Pain is the great master until you can learn to become it's master. I myself am learning to embrace pain very slowly. I have mastered cold showers but these are trivial compared to getting toe nails ripped off, pins in eyeballs, crushed body parts and going through the worst atrocities for millions of years straight. What are peoples thoughts on this and any advice on how to better confront pain? I have been using mindfulness to deal with pain and breaking my bodies pain down into smaller segments that I can take on individually.

@Leo Gura That's true, I forgot that intentions can be understood through emotion. I have been experiencing more love when I meditate. And it becomes quite clear what is important to me when I feel love. You appreciate everything haha.

I have a few questions that have come about because I am struggling to understand reality so that I can base my life around this understanding. It is obviously something I am not aware can be done or how exactly to get there. I've been struggling with my life purpose. Because if God does not care about pain and suffering should I not align my purpose with Gods? Which would mean I would not go out of my way to help people. Even if I knew that everyone else was me, god would still not care, so why should I? But I have a choice, and that is that I want to help minimise suffering and pain on this planet. Although these can be helpful teachers, there are thresholds of these that are just unnecessary and completely horrendous for any life form to experience. The reason I have struggled with life purpose is because I am trying to understand gods purpose through Leos teachings. Because I am not skilled enough to experience any deep truths for myself. And I don't think that if god had a purpose that it would be in line with my own. It clearly doesn't care about pain which is something I can't get my head around. But maybe my ideas of seeing pain as a bad thing would change if I lost the ability to feel it. My small idea of good and bad obviously differ to gods if it does exist. I often ponder why god, or I, would create this in the first place. To create reality for any reason, such as to know itself, would mean that god is selfish like an ego. And if it is all intelligent it clearly possesses any human thinking capabilities and so would not just erreneously create something without having a reason to do so. So if this god exists would this not mean that at some point it was selfish? But I may be very naive and this goes way beyond me. The illusion could be so convincing when nothing was really created in the first place.... Has anyone here experienced the truth for themselves? There must be some stuff that you just can't understand as a human and I guess I am just wondering whether it is possible for an ego to understand the why of it all? Or is this something that ego can never understand? Life is worthwile living for alot of creatures, and it is truly amazing to try to take it all in. But there's a reason behind it all. Perhaps god does not want pain and suffering but to not decrease the authenticity of the life experience it does not intervene...

@flume I've had some experiences with this kind of energy. The latest was actually last night when on a mushroom trip. I got to a state of surrender, no longer feeding it, and my body started spasaming at places as I released it. It felt amazing when it was all released, I felt like I had shedded a skin and was myself again. Breathing felt orgasmic and I was totally alive. Unfortunately after the trip I can now feel this dense energy in my body again. I think it will take time to work out of the system. I practice quetening my mind and not reacting to things. Because this is a self made entity and it grows stronger when you unconsciously react to things. It likes feeding off fear. I've also had a few experiences while asleep where my pain body comes alive. It's manifested itself visually as a demon grabbing my legs and trying to pull me out of my body. Once I stopped resisting it merged with me, explosive energy jolts released but it's still there strongly. When it's mind merged with mine I felt it posses me a little and saw a twisted weird mess of energy. I've also encountered theses energies only recently when walking through bush at night. Ive walked through bush multiple times and never experienced anything like this. I felt a rush of fear and then sounded like animals coming towards me. But nothing there. And in nz animals don't come towards you at night. Then when moving away faster branches overhanging the path began to move towards me. There was no wind and they started moving just by me. I've always got this energy, I'm just learning how to feed it less through mindfulness. I've heard it's just trapped energy, kindy sppoky though. So I also think that you do pick it up from your environment which is why you may feel it being foreign. You must remember that you are more powerful than it and it cannot harm you in any way, it just makes your human body more uncomfortable. The more conscious energy you bring into your life, the more you diminish these energies and your own grows.

Whats up motherfuckers! I just had a dual experiences on mushrooms and thought i'd chip in because, you know, I still have an ego that wants to be a know it all. But I also know that source energy is good for me, all of me. So fuck my ego, I mean, I love it! We know what fun would this play of life be if we didn't have the devil, our best buddy, to fuck with us. So can we stop fucking with each other! I mean, let's keep fucking with each other! Otherwise what else would there be to do. Stand around holding hands, singing kom ba yah. Yeah maybe if we reach that level of evolution. But my ego hopes not. Anything that throws ego off brings in more source. Humor is more prominent with connection to source. I like the stuff i've seen on this forum cause people are open to knew shit. Which is important, any rigidity in your own ways will fuck you. The truth is, there is no one way, or no way to the truth. You have to go the way of the no way to find the way haha. Thought I'd spew some human gibberish on this thread. Clearly there is something that the ego must do to stop itself. Yeah it must piss off. All this talk about enlightenment experiences, it all comes down to identification. The same experience, different identity. The experience is received with more ease, still the same experience. Doesn't change. So how to change your identity? Don't, let it change on it's own. I don't know, you guys know yoga etc. You may be thinking what does this random fella know? My human wouldn't have much understanding about enlightenment compared to you guys. But my ego doesn't have to as long as I operate through elevated energy. All we have to do is stop feeding the illusion. How? Stop thinking you don't know, need to take years of hard work etc to get there. Don't feed any of your story. These energy patterns are what is draining you of your source energy. We take drugs, no ego, more pleasure. We have more pleasure less ego. We feel as though we know something whenever we feel good, that there is something amazing happening. Happiness only occurs without ego. Ego is the devil doing his amazing job at keeping life not boring. So if you bring more energy into your life, naturally you will have less ego. You can get outside more in nature, do things you enjoy etc. Or learn to identify what is draining you of your energy. Full body awareness, awareness of thought patterns, current desires etc. This is all energy you feed. But egos idea of becoming more aware is again an unconscious energy that feeds a new behavioural pattern, draining your source energy. This is nothing knew, which is why I do not expect anyone to read this. But I feel like expressing this energy anyway so I might as well on here were someone might get the chance to look at it, potentially help, potentially not. I really do think the devil is important here, he is more prominent when you are close to awakening. Obviously yin, yang. More of this, more of that. That's the thing, he temps you with good energies, bad energies, any energies. Obviously devils not really a thing, it's just not knowing or not aware. We unconsciously let things play out and constantly try to figure things out. But if we just look that is all that is required. Illusion collapse mode. Quite often we may be doing the right thing to lead to more detachment, but get tempted down another path. Somehow we need to get our human to understand how to get our ego to do nothing, surrender to boss man. Do nothing, tried it, thought it might work had a bit of luck once in blue moon, moved on. I got stuck always trying to not do nothing with do nothing technique. Fast forward about 8 months and it's back, except the path has given me a much deeper body awareness and now do nothing works. How it work? All I did was rephrase it as don't react. Complete different interpretation by ego, ego now doesn't try to not do anything, ego dumb. But no, ego keep me from source so it's doing it's job. But yeah just by rephrasing it to myself as don't react the technique now works for me. Oh well. Ego/mind now has knew task. Don't try to not do anything, rather when something occurs don't do anything about it. Previously when I was doing do nothing technique energy would arise and my ego would think, shit i'm not doing nothing and I now need to try to not do nothing. But now, energy arises, no response. Energy arises again, no response. Ego starts to get pushy and starts giving me big scary energies. No response. Collapse, bye ego. Wait you still there a little bit but now i'm watching you from different identification mode. Hello good times. Awareness arise through do nothing. Any trying depletes awareness and energy. But doing completely nothing very hard as mind must have task. Give mind task of not reacting when energy arises, now mind not doing anything and energy is slowly playing out, releasing itself. Surrender happens on its own. Much practice needed but best progress yet. Thank you

Ahhh, thank you. It's pretty crazy for a human to try to comprehend infinity, we're kind of used to ends and beginnings. What a selfless act though to go through this again and again ❤

Will god ever complete its purpose? If everything is infinite then will god not just be playing out infinitely?

I am aware that the singular thing that exists is direct experience. However, the universe within this experience follows a set of very strict unchanging laws. My question is, what is the relationship between consciousness and the physical world? Elaborating a bit - How are humans able to realise that they are conscious when it is not actually them that is conscious, but consciousness itself? There must be some relationship between the human's neurons and consciousness for the human to realise it is conscious. Since the behaviour of neurons are bounded by the laws of the universe, would this not suggest that consciousness is also not separate from these laws in order for it to interact/communicate with neurons?

Right, thanks

I think I'm trying to understand something that can't be understood, only become.

Ok cheers guys. I guess the best way of understanding it is to do the work to become it. So does this mean that through advanced work i become all other animals thoughts and sensations? Or in a way different than I do with my current ego?