Flowerfaeiry

Very poetic

Wow thank you so much, all really good things to think about.

Bro I'm the BEST housewife Also, it's deeper than that.

I knew it was a joke. I'm not intimidated by crude comments, just kinda makes someone seem careless plus, I know my power as woman.

It got harder with covid but yea even then, a lot of people don't know what they like and that's not a good match for me.

The last few guys I've chosen have been pretty masculine, I didn't even think about that. Progress haha.

Just to clarify--there are many different ways of doing "no poo" and that is one of the worst-- although most popular. I'm kinda possessive of this method because it's worked really well to heal my scalp and hair so had to defend my advice a bit lol. I just water wash and occasionally use shampoo to remove buildup that comes from life.

Do you live in a dry climate? Are you hydrated? Tbh some people just run more dry than others and there's not much you can do internally to change the body's natural constitution, sorry to say. But if you are a naturally dry person, foods that are higher in quality fat and staying hydrated can help. Don't be so opposed to topical solutions. Once you've done all you can internally, try shea butter, olive oil(made for skin) castor oil, these are all natural, single ingredient moisturizers that can actually improve skin's dryness and overall quality. Something else you might consider is doing "no-poo" which is the no shampoo method for your hair. It allows your hair to regulate back to its natural cleansing routine and will help with dry scalp as its oils are not being stripped (any shampoo, no matter how gentle, is stripping the scalp of its natural oils).

Oh, that was you! I still think about that lol. What do you mean by the controlling behavior?

No you're totally right. I find myself longing for a partner more in the times I'm feeling sad or worse about myself.

This is huge. And unsettling lol. I've always chose feminine men because I couldn't fathom receiving in that way.

Grew up in it. Dad had classic books like How to Win Friends and Influence People and Think and Grow Rich and raised us with self improvement mindsets. But I don't recommend this way of being introduced to self-actualization. Because for YEARS I was lying to myself about improving when really I was just doing mental masturbation. My parents are also of very low integrity and I'm pretty sure the self improvement stuff has just been a cover up for their problems. It's actually shown me how easy it is to half-ass this type of stuff. And the difference between being serious and kinda just doing it willy-nilly.

@somegirl I LOVE ordering a fancy virgin drink when I go out. Look at their cocktail list and see if they can do one without alcohol. Or it doesn't even have to be fancy. Ask for a club soda with a lime and have them give it to you in a glass with a straw(if they first reach for a plastic cup). I like to tip well for special requests like those. It makes you feel good about having something nice to drink and you can stay healthy

I appreciate your perspective. It IS hard to meet just good people in general.

Thank you. You're right. I'm going to explore that as things are opening up more in my city.

Just -practice-. If you're not even doing that, no matter what type it is, you're not gonna go very far.

There is a lot of good advice here on the forum. I often go to post something here and then realize that I already have the answer, I just need to sort it out in my mind a bit better. No need to criticize yourself about that. Just keep asking more and better questions based of the answers you get and your own exploration. It's good that you're thinking and learning and asking questions. If you want to make a post you could make one that is about an insight you have or something you would like to teach us. Don't worry about what other people think about your posts, just put some good thought into it. Try to taper down the time you spend on the forum. For example if you spend 2 hours on it a day, start spending only 1.5 hours on it per day. Become really mindful of the time you spend on it. That will be a good place to start.

I've wondered about that...

In what way? Like going back to all your unhealthy habits? Not really, unless you only stopped the addictions for the retreat.

Eckhart Tolle says women are closer to source because they can bear children and as such are more in their bodies.

I've had "casual sex" but I feel like the term is a bit of a misnomer.

eggs

Yes, but it may not be so cut and dry. You seem to have somewhat of a good relationship with her otherwise. Maybe try talking to her about your concerns when you two are in a good place, not when she's giving you the cold shoulder. Keep it lighthearted and express to her in a positive manner what bothers you about some of the interactions you two have. It can be easy to spiral into negativity with stuff like this so keep it upbeat if possible. If you've actually been feeling like breaking it off is best, allow yourself to explore that possibility and go from there.

If you're a woman, you neeeed to read Women Who Run with the Wolves

You two have been friends for three years, it is a bit strange you don't feel comfortable talking to her about this. The situation you describe with wondering how she will behave toward you and that it's emotionally draining reminds me of how folks feel in an abusive relationship.