yangmilun

Got you.

Its suprise to see that you'd say i am a human. normal let me feel sooo good.

I feel bad is because I watch so many Leo videos and sometimes my mind is shit that I think maybe I never improve myself. I feel bad is because I see people grows, their family, business, emotion. But not me. I feel my problem is so simple and so tiny and lots media have answers for those but I keep reading them, then I solve them, then I happy, then be peace, then no passion, then create those problems again! then I regret and confuse how come it back, then I think maybe I didn't completely solved. then loop, I keep reading the anwsers.

write down here to clear my messy mind: Cannot distinguish the thing that is attracted me or, I do this is just because I want to catch people's eyes (show off). Then I feel you mention here is a huge point. not a simple one. Fight lonely: enjoy and do the thing that attracts me but no one support and appreciate. So I feel lonely, I feel to share. Fight society: crazy family and friends in my mind point at me that "I should focus on money rather than doing my shit" Fight Fight: So Why should I make so many obstacle in the middle to reach what I want., maybe its simple. Maybe I think to reach a thing what I havent done is not easy, "need a lot of work" just like Leo said. So I listen to you to join the groups you said that could jump those unimportant "Fights". Then it will come out lots other problems....oh no. hahah oh no. but anyway. I will take steps. thank you

Yes, I want to be truly me. I have no clear mind what is truly me when I have strong ego or negative mode. Everytime I am truly me then I write down the note to tell ego me "you should read it". Well, I should say that truly me is....is the moment I feel great. so I write down something. but ego me tells me no need, it just pretent to be a fake person or other person that is not meaninful. and also the goal is nothing. passion is nothing.

always to hear higher level reply here rather than "its ok, its fine" without any suggestions. Thank you guys.

So I wonder... I wanna be the person, who is powerful, respectful, energy, funny, positive and blissful. IN EVERY PRESENT MOMENT. is that too tough? Huh? Why does the ego me always come back and find me? It tells me do not solve the problem. just be you.

To be honest, I am not honest when ego me is on me. And I am authentic when I feel powerful. Ego me tries to ask for help, but did no honest to describe the problem because of fear. and authentic me is open and positive and brave, and can clearly to say the problem, but need no one to help. A big disconnection you know? The person needs help but on one can help, the person who can solve the problem has no problem.

It's funny to read my post. very childish this guy haha.

Short summart put on the first: Does your conciousness/awareness help your business to deal with unconciousness client better? Client: Why don't you use tap-water for your plant. Me: City water contains bleach, which is not healthy for plant, the shop told me that we should use Mineral water for this plant. Client: Becuase plant shop wants you use Mineral water to kill the plant then you could buy the new one from them. Me: Really? wow, they are so smart, hahahaha. Later I realized, it does not matter with plant, It's about client was alert to lack of knowledge, which trigger his self-esteem that others could not reject his suggestion. If I just be honest to tell the opinion what I think, then he will convince me that I need to be more smart to avoid the trap. Whatever Leadership, Authority, who is right/wrong, or control desire. Maybe, I could do better. better to protect his comfort zone, or people who is unconciousness. If I have ability to get higher level of relationship with different background people, then I could build strong relationship in business. Or, let's say, we now have this awareness ability to feel what problems they have, then how do we use our magic on this?

I should study boardly and improve myself more. I feel shame.

You just let me realized it's time to prove Storytelling Logic.

400 years later, ego is the king?

It's loop. Get you.

I feel like unconciousness and conciousness had a dialogue of the deaf. When I am unconciousness, I listen the people who is conciousness, I listen, but I cannot feel it, so I look for demonstration to prove that is right, because I really wanna be better. then I check the website like bestgore and then I feel more confuse, angry, upset and frustrated. People who are conciousness still try to help, with their own truly experience. Disconnected. just like parents knows everyhing, they do help, child listen, but never understand, If enlightenment only happened on a right moment, why do people still help?

1995, Confident little boy. 1998, Shy boy. Not talking. 2000, Parents divorced. 2001, Searching love. Hateful. Weakness. 2003, World is unfriendly. 2005, Lost. read "Law of Attraction". 2007, Note and record emotion. 2009 Read shit psychology books. a lot. 2013, Online consulting and psychologist. 2014, Youtube. Self-improvement. Leo. 2015, Newbie of enlightenment. 2016, Study, gym, book, cook, office. Selfish. 2017, Be bad. Arguing. Release, immature. 2018, Self-Actualized starter. 2019. Money, Love, Study, Work, Awareness.

This is what I am asking too. I am very interesting how people reply your question. What I understand about reply here: 1. Look inside (your mind) instead of outside (material). No bullshiting result: You are happy to improve yourself rather than upset to look others' dirty. 2. Understand what they suffered, then you will stand on thieir position. No bullshiting result: Empathy replaces resistance. When my awareness/conciouness get higher, why do I see more darkness? how do I answer my confused: 1. Main point is: can you deal with lonely? You will feel lonely after you can see clearly of what spirial dynamics is, different levels they are. You want to share happiness to the people who you don't like. 2. Many people realized this situation. I image they can do it better than me. so how they do it, look others' replys here.

Thanks for sharing.

Gossip mode: what???????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Not sure its helpful, but post those tips that u might be inspired: 1. travel, out of ur room and talk to different people. 2. feel dark then be dark. show ur emotion. 3. helping others. weakness meet weakness. 4. record ur negative feeling in detail, and google all solution. 5. write ur story as fiction. or draw it, or play it through music. darkness is art. 6. dont try to be productive if u dont want. dont do anything u think u should but u dont like. 7.write down ur goal. big dream. aim. write down what u good at. analysis urself as third person. 8. its time to play game. first task is helping Kallan out of darkness. after that, next one. 9. Fashion, Facebook, Game app, Music, Party, Book, Gym, Youtube, Movie, Food, Family, Sex, Beer, Library, Porn, Shower, Cook, Park, Fishing, Drive, Gossip.

Jealous.

What is your business? something about enlightenment?

That's your answer to your question then. nice one.

Leo says, spiral dynamic stage on turquoise people, or enlightened people, they doing the same thing as we do. eat, sleep. living. But I do understand what you confused, so let me tell you. (Don't tell anyone on this forum) Which is: Be Rich. Yes, get a lot of money. After you get rich, buy a lot stuff. house, party, people. just buy it. Then you sick of money, now we sit down talk about enlightment. right? we first need to feel why ego is illustion, why everything is nothing. That is wrong answer, but yea, it works. (Don't tell anyone) Jump so fast make us lost.

Your words fuel my brain.