Leo Gura

So then you have what you want. Unless you don't want it. Get very clear about what you want and what the costs are.

I didn't suggest that you to come up with theories. Contemplation/inquiry is not a matter of guess-work or speculation. You don't know that. You haven't even bothered to contemplate or observe what desire is. Maybe if you looked at it, you'd find out. After all, there it is -- in you. If you can't understand it, who can? After all, we're not talking about understanding moon rocks or kangaroos, we're talking about the desires you feel and act out every day. Is desire really unexplainable? Everything is God. So that doesn't help you.

@Identity Very good analysis. Zoom out further and your girlfriend is revealed to be a projection of your own mind. But let's not get ahead of our skiis

If someone says that to you, run away while you can. Such reassurances don't need to be made in healthy relationships. Your descriptions of him are getting more and more toxic and dysfunctional. There is no way this will work, so don't feel bad, you're not really surrendering anything workable by leaving. You are simply accepting that this is unworkable. You will save yourself years of suffering and dysfunction by leaving now. Such a guy can drag down your entire life. So treat this rationally. Don't let your feelings for him cloud your wisdom. Frankly, why are you settling for this shit? It's like you go to a nice restuarant, they serve you a turd, and you persist in eating it. Stand up and walk out.

Why do you not desire death? Think about it.

That's karma and requires consciousness to overcome. You are stuck operating from the lower chakras, as they say. You basically live like an animal, shitting whenever you feel like it and then complaining about the mess.

@Swagala Your question more broadly is: What is desire? Tis a good one to contemplate. Why desire anything at all?

@Preety_India You are too conscious to be in a relationship with him. If you're into this work, you need to find partners who are willing to actually communicate, self-reflect, and be conscious about how they relate with you. Find a guy who values personal development so you can be on the same page. Don't get stuck in a dead-end relationship. It's better to be single.

You can't replace a bad habit with nothing. You need a new healthy habit instead.

@GabeN Nothingness is not an idea. You will never understand it in the way you're trying to. Only awakening. No other way. Any attempt you make at trying to understand Nothingness takes you further away from it. Just stop and sit in silence. Look at your hand. Do not talk. Do not think. Do not move. Do not try to figure it out. Do not ask questions.

No, memory is mental imagery. That is not consciousness proper. That is mind activity. The Absolute cannot be stored in memory. Memory happens inside the Absolute. This is a crucial mistake. You cannot get to the Absolute through memory.

Where IS mind. Get it?

It's a delicate balance of staying open to feedback and willing to re-asses one's position, but also being very clear about what the Absolute Truth is and not giving an inch when it comes to that. One of the fruits of lots of serious self-inquiry is that you become grounded in direct experience so deeply that other people's ideas/beliefs no longer become important. Basically you ground yourself in Consciousness, God, Truth, and Love. When you are coming from that place, nothing else matters and you have true strength.

@Preety_India This is a communication problem. You need to communicate authentically with him. Tell him exactly what you told us and leave room for him to speak his mind. There cannot be a relationship without honest and genuine communication where both partners can air their thoughts & feelings without argumentation or debate. It's called "clearing". You two sit down, each takes 5 minutes to talk without interruption and gets everything of his/her chest. Then you switch sides. No interrupting, no debating, no rebutting, no justifying, no criticizing, no name-calling, no blaming. Just say how you feel and what you want. Let him do the same. Of course he must be emotionally mature enough to handle this kind of communication. If he cannot handle it, if he refuses to try it and put effort into it, then leave him because it will never work anyway. A relationship with such a person is impossible.

Masculine/feminine is a duality. You cannot define yourself as a man without simultaneously defining yourself a not a woman. You can't really work on one without affecting the other.

Another doozy:

You can buy San Pedro at HomeDepot in the US. Lol. It's just a damn cactus. Ebay sells San Pedro by the foot.

Consciousness & lots of awakening. Psychedelics help a lot. You have many, many layers of inauthenticity to shed. It's difficult to see how deep your inauthenticity goes without psychedelics. Deep authenticity is impossible so long as you are dominated by fear and survival -- and the ego is all about fear and survival.

@Sirius Orion Already covered in the How Authority Works video. The more awakenings you have, the more you fully take back your authority as God, the less you care about unconscious trolls.

That is the crux of the matter. That is gonna limit your growth. The highest wisdom will not be supported by society at all. You will be all on your own. In fact, people will tear your down and demonize you and call you crazy. And you have to be wise and strong enough to laugh off their ignorance. Ignorant people love to gaslight the wise with their ignorance. You gotta rise above this kinda thing because you will encounter it a lot going forward. I get it on a daily basis.

I like Warren or Yang as 2nd choice.

Problem with baby bonds is that millions of adults need help now. They ain't babies. We gonna help the babies but not the adults who raise them??

4-AcO has tolerance which lasts up to a week. You can't take it daily.

If you are male, female itself is your shadow. You are not really male or female. Both are dualities. You include and transcend both. Work more on integrating your feminine. That's part of what gayness is about.

Then you're doing something right