Endew

Downsides To Confidence And Self-esteem?

15 posts in this topic

About a 2 years ago i had so much momentum in my life. On top of that i made a decision to work on my Confidence and self esteem. Like it was a job for about 6 months.( Leo's videos, Nlp confidence, 6 pillars of self-esteem, theron's personal magnetism, and some course's i invested in.( john kehoes mind power etc.) I felt real good like happy to start my day and ready for the challenges of life. And got a lot of confirmations from others. However i started to get scared. I felt more lonely then i ever had in my life. I felt distant from my parents and siblings. (They seemed a little jealous). Distant from the world kinda like a sociopath or pyschopath. I ran and went back into my bubble of low-self esteem and unproductive habits. Anybody ever feel this way or have any advice for me?

 

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It sounds like you weren't really confident. When you are really grounded in who you are, you don't care about the opinions of others, alienation, loneliness or fear.

It sounds like you were moving in the right direction but got scared and quit. There are no downsides to confidence or self-esteem.

When you are doing your own thing, feelings of loneliness are unavoidable. But later you realize that they were just withdrawal symptoms.

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@Pallero  I didn't care about the opinions of others, which made me feel like a sociopath.

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1 hour ago, Endew said:

@Pallero  I didn't care about the opinions of others, which made me feel like a sociopath.

That's interesting. What do you mean? Did you want to intentionally cause others harm? If so, what kind of harm?

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@Pallero  No, i just didn't care what people thought ,I felt fearless, and was really calm.

Edited by Endew

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13 minutes ago, Endew said:

@Pallero  No, i just didn't care what people thought ,I felt fearless, and was really calm.

But that sounds good! Are you sure you know what a sociopath means? :D

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14 minutes ago, Endew said:

@Pallero  No, i just didn't care what people thought and I felt fearless.

Interesting conversation. To me, it doesn't sound like you were becoming a sociopath, but instead heading towards an awakened state.

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No, never. Confidence is like driving a car. Drivers are confident in their ability to drive safely, effectively, fearless. 

If a driver doesn't feel confident, he/she can make mistakes on the road, feel fearful to merge onto highways, etc. they're doubtful of their abilities. 

Sounds like you're not confident in your abilities to stay confident. Stop letting your emotions get the best of you...

Edited by Argue

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Are you sure that you were confident and didn't care about other's opinion of you, or did you stop caring about their feelings? Confidence isn't arrogance, or feeling superior. Could there have been a touch of that and maybe you were beginning to feel uncaring at all,l and hence the sociopath ideation. Just a thought

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Well cool, now you know where the confidence training went a little astray. Now you can get back on that path to be the real, loving confident you.

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11 minutes ago, Endew said:

@ZenTwizzle  Your right i stopped caring about their feelings aswell as opinions

This then is an example of where compassion work (such as from Buddhism) would be helpful. I agree with @ZenTwizzle sounds like you were led a little astray, but you can pick up and try another approach.

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Arrogance and Problems revolving around your lower self/Egoism

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