Messaging Game

[B3N]

Anyone got any good tips / resources for messaging game? Seems like a big aspect of game in the 21st century but I've not found much on it. By "messaging game" I mean chatting over text, primarily for dating apps. 

 

[John Paul]

Tips I heard that make sense:

send one message at a time- like one or two sentence, not a paragraph. Never double text.

[something_else]

On 02/01/2023 at 10:51 PM, B3N said:

Seems like a big aspect of game in the 21st century

It is. I see some people including Leo say that you should aim to make texting a sideline activity at the start and keep it to the bear minimum, just use it to set up dates. But in almost every circumstance I try to use that approach it backfires, most of the time girls want to see that you can actually be fun over text/message nowadays

Edited January 4, 2023 by something_else

[meta_male]

58 minutes ago, something_else said:

But in almost every circumstance I try to use that approach it backfires, most of the time girls want to see that you can actually be fun over text/message nowadays

Now imagine how fun they themselves are going to be in person...

 

[John Paul]

2 hours ago, meta_male said:

Now imagine how fun they themselves are going to be in person...

 

Good point! Nice job flipping this one around.

[something_else]

3 hours ago, meta_male said:

Now imagine how fun they themselves are going to be in person...

 

I mean generally girls who are interested put effort into texts as well.

If a girl is giving me almost nothing to work with over text I move on because it's not worth the time and effort to try and squeeze water from a stone. Or rather than leaving them on read I'll just ask them out and take a more direct approach. It's worked a few times for me.

You basically want to learn how to express yourself authentically, interestingly and naturally over text like you do in real life too so that conversations flow and feel natural + interesting over text as well.

Edited January 4, 2023 by something_else

[meta_male]

@John Paul ✌️

38 minutes ago, something_else said:

I mean generally girls who are interested put effort into texts as well.

And your approach still backfires with those who show interest initially?

[something_else]

16 minutes ago, meta_male said:

@John Paul ✌️

And your approach still backfires with those who show interest initially?

It's very rare that a girl I don't build a reasonable connection with over text first wants to go on a date with me

[meta_male]

@something_else There's just too many factors to take into account as to why they suddenly ghost. You also have quite a few girls on dating apps who are still in relationships.

You can still build rapport first, but the goal should be to set up a date, time and place to meet and then go about your life purpose.

If she's flakey about going on a date just tell her to shoot you a message if she changes her mind and send her your number. 
This has worked really well. Almost all of them texted me some days later.

 

 

[something_else]

8 minutes ago, meta_male said:

@something_else There's just too many factors to take into account as to why they suddenly ghost. You also have quite a few girls on dating apps who are still in relationships.

You can still build rapport first, but the goal should be to set up a date, time and place to meet and then go about your life purpose.

Idk, as a guy you just don't stick in a girl's mind at all if you aren't mentally stimulating to her. It's pretty hard to do that in a few texts. Maybe if you met her in person and made a great impression it's different, but even then... Girls forget about most guys very easily

You can balance the odds a bit by building some connection over text in the days before whatever date you've setup

19 minutes ago, meta_male said:

If she's flakey about going on a date just tell her to shoot you a message if she changes her mind and send her your number. 
This has worked really well. Almost all of them texted me some days later.

 

That's a good idea. I have done this a few times when I cba trying to talk to a girl who is flakey. I wouldn't say the success rate was especially good for me however

[meta_male]

1 minute ago, something_else said:

You can balance the odds a bit by building some connection over text in the days before whatever date you've setup

I know what you mean. But don't underestimate the more counterintuitive approach of not caring about balancing the odds 

You actually stick out more the less you're trying to control the outcome. Being a little mystical sparks her emotion more than the average guy trying his hardest to build a connection with yet another meaningless word salad.