How to handle anger in relationships?

[Lyubov]

I often times find myself having this feeling of pent up anger/rage. It will show up especially in my romantic relationships and in my current one as well. I won't really communicate it properly nor do I know how to express it in healthy ways with a partner. It will make it hard for me to communicate with her when I get triggered by something that makes me furious. I will feel a tremendous amount of rage and then try to communicate in an amicable way without blame or judgement but I can feel it's built up and I'm holding it back, the conversation may then fall apart and we will have a big fight. I try to play the "mediator" or be the cool headed compassionate communicator but when tension builds up it sort of reaches it's breaking point. I will snap at her and tell her to leave and am left feeling incredibly angry. It doesn't feel good at all. How can a guy express anger in healthy ways in a relationship when he feels triggered or something builds up between the two? I'm tired of holding it back. 

[Opo]