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Kalki Avatar

Attractive and Non-Attractive at the same time?

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Posted (edited)

How is that even if im good looking, extrovert with positive personality and confident, girls feel attratcted towards me but the moment they sense some negativity or lack focus from me they get repelled. 

Its like am positive and negative at the same time. For example, in the past I didnt care much about money so i never had a sense of lack in it but my finances sucked. Still, girls got much attratcted to me. Now, "to be realistic" I kinda had to focus on the lack of it to improve it. If not I would still not care and suck at it. Also, I discovered that the more real I am as I dropped many of my illusions my life has improved overall. Specially suffering to some extent. But i find that I had more success with women when I was more deluded. When I had more powerful dreams and delusions. They can smell that perfume of my delusions and get seduced by them. Now I find that only a few girls really get attratcted to me. The more real I have become, the harder this has become. Including expressing even my negativity. In the past I used to hide my negativity and almost always just show positivity. I could get laid easier but everything was built on a house of cards. 

Just want to know if anyone has gone through something like this. 

Dating is a fckng invisible maze to never end. The more I discover the more I discover I have lot to discover. 

So, is it that as I have changed to more realness, has also my niche changed in the sex market? When I try to attract the girls I used to in the past, the elite rich girls, they get attratcted but also intimidated or even hate me. Its like i carry too much realness for their delusions. 

Aside from this, I want to know how much does carrying negativity is responsible for success in dating. Im not a negative person, but am aware that am carrying some negative emotions and stress from not so long ago traumas. 

Edited by Kalki Avatar

The riches of illusion do not even compare to the riches of freedom.  -Sri Sadguru Siddharameshwar Maharaj

 

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Posted (edited)

Well because first of all the more conscious you become the less people you’ll have to understand you. Plus it sounds to me you’re not fully in a happy place yet, you’re going through some changes and uncovering some pains. Do you share that with your dates? Your dates are not your shrinks and women generally like men who are mentally strong. When you were more blind/delusional you appeared mentally strong to them. 

 

Edited by Khr

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@Khr I was delusional in the sense of being inside deeper mental dream states. Now im more real in an animalistic sense. My authenticity is raw animalistic. Im more grounded, direct, assertive, agressive, confrontational, savage and confident. See all those qualities have recontextualized my dating niche completely. I feel weird even trying to approach such girls. 

Nvm, dating is just too complex. Its not as easy as living in U.S or europe. Third World countries just suck for it. It has made my dating live a fckng maze. And not only mine, but almost every atttactive guy here has lots of problems too. Location and culture is crucial. Just add those two factors plus all the shit you got to learn to date properly. It makes dating extremely random. You might get results once a month, cuz the mass quantity is extremely low for something of good value. What is a 9 here is a 7 in U.S. Which makes good looking girls extremely high value. Thats why I cant depend my sex on pickup in here due to so many fckng factors. You need time to practice too, but i got shit to do. So is a fckng endless maze. So many distinctions to make, so much memorizing, so much updating your knowledge to the current market to where you are... So much stuff no wonder why so many guys suck at it. Its not just you and being confident,etc.

Enligthenment is kid stuff compared to succesful consistent dating. For enligthenment you just need to want it and have some balls. You can isolate yourself or invest 90% of your time in it and in a week you will have some results in your meditation. And even better, you can just use psychedelics to get a 100% awakening. Why am I not after enligthenment right now? Well, theres 95% probability my future would go to the garbage can if I fck it or who knows what even after. Spiritual teachers are mostly positive scammers. 

Edited by Kalki Avatar

The riches of illusion do not even compare to the riches of freedom.  -Sri Sadguru Siddharameshwar Maharaj

 

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On 10/9/2021 at 10:09 AM, Kalki Avatar said:

But i find that I had more success with women when I was more deluded. When I had more powerful dreams and delusions.

Lack of need can help with attraction, but not as much as purpose.

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