Strongly Attracted To Girls Who Wear High Heels

[Life]

Hi everyone,

throughout my youth up to now (I am 26 years old) I feel an extremely strong attraction for girls who wear high heels especially during every day life. I am not sure how to deal with that and what the root issues of this kind of fetish are, though I have some initial ideas: I as a very logical and practical man have a hard time to understand why a women would wear high heels in every day life, especially if the heel exceeds a certain height, but on the other hand this irrational behavior is exactly what excites me and triggers extremely strong sexual fantasies. I also associate with this behavior some provocation (especially in the case of overknee boots) and high confidence -- a girl with low confidence would not choose these kind of shoes. So here a root issue might be that I am a natural introvert who often lacks to express himself freely, so sexual fantasies with a girl who does not lack this expressiveness might be a short cut solution for my own lack of expressiveness.

I would be very thankful for some comments on my ideas. I would also appreciate some tips how to deal with my desires: Should I approach more girls who wear high heels? And should I tell them that I especially recognized them because of their shoes? I would feel a bit creepy and superficial (even if I don't say anything about their shoes) -- I am not yet comfortable with my fetish, although I tell all girls I slept with about it. Unfortunately none of them was really this high heel type of girl

Best wishes!

[clytaemnestra]

51 minutes ago, Life said:

a girl with low confidence would not choose these kind of shoes.

Are you sure? I don't wear them because without them I'm 175 centimeters. With them I'm higher than 99% of men. And I have a lot of confidence to pick up a men I want just for one night. Without heels and artificial make up. 

[SFRL]

@Life I don't see the problem. Own it. 

[Life]

2 hours ago, clytaemnestra said:

Are you sure? I don't wear them because without them I'm 175 centimeters. With them I'm higher than 99% of men. And I have a lot of confidence to pick up a men I want just for one night. Without heels and artificial make up. 

@clytaemnestra I wrote that wearing heels implies confidence. From that you can not infer the opposite direction, that wearing no high heels implies no confidence. I made no claim about this direction

 

[Psychonaut]

I don't see where the problem is. I could probably write down a huge list of things that turn me on and off and so could probably every man who is honest with himself. Don't overthink it. 

[Life]

Thank you for your opinions.

I might overthink it, but it is such a huge turn on for me, that I get frustrated if "my" girl is not into wearing high heels. This might be also partly (maybe 10-30%)  a reason why I broke up with my girlfriend recently -- for my rational mind this seems not to be healthy.

[MaxBlank]

The "root" of the issue is suffering, that is all.

A good question to consider is "How much trouble am I willing to endure over this attraction?"

How many good woman are you willing to forgo for the sake of this attraction?

How much of your life are you willing to let this single attraction consume, or dominate?

Best of luck with it.

[SFRL]

@Life altough I think it's something that you can work with and even enjoy I can see how this behaviour can be labeled as "lower self".

What I find is that when you focus really hard on a problem that arises from the lower self and it won't go away it's worth focussing on other areas of your life where you can eliminate or decrease the influence of the he lower self. 

Just an example: No longer being attached to social media. You can come up with your own examples. 

When you shift your focus working on one area it's interesting how sometimes other areas dominated by the lower self start to fall away as well. 

Or you start solving problems or get insights about areas affected by the lower self that you didn't even know were an item for you. 

I think its because as a whole you will have become an improved version of yourself. And then you can tackle problems that you maybe can't now or could not before. 

Edited December 14, 2016 by STC