Preety_India

Becoming More Masculine

25 posts in this topic

I struggled all my life with masculinity. 

I was deeply entrenched into my femininity. 

Most people who I met called me an extremely feminine woman. 

Well I do take pride in being able to relate to my sex in on such a level, yet not having any masculinity in me made me suffer in many ways in my life. 

People would attack me and I always cowered back into my feminine self and never fought back 

It was almost drilled into my head that a woman should never fight back. 

So i never did

 

 

It took years for me to realize that I need to break this feminine mold and stop thinking like a female all the  time. 

It's harmful because you lose self preservation that way. 

You take in so much femininity that it makes you very docile and submissive. 

I was always the submissive in all my relationships. I was always with strong masculine men because it complemented my femininity really well. 

 

 

But something inside was screaming very loudly.. Telling me how long can I keep putting up with the shit that others throw at me and having to preserve my femininity in the process? 

 

I felt like rebeling. I felt like screaming loud.. 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

But I am slowly trying to be more masculine. 

One part of this struggle is that women are constantly put down and insulted and shamed if they try to integrate the masculine 

 

 

 

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I say to a woman right now - be who you want to be 

 

Break the pathetic Patriarchal Mold that you were brought up in. 

 

BREAK THAT CEILING THAT WAS PUT BY MEN 

 

BREAK OUT OF IT. 

 

IF YOU ARE JUDGED FOR WHO YOU ARE AS A WOMAN, THEN THOSE ARE PATHETIC PEOPLE 

 

 

DON'T STOP YOURSELF FROM WANTING WHAT YOU WANT. 

FUCK THOSE WHO HATE YOU FOR WHO YOU ARE. 

 

 

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Interesting article on the divine masculine here, you might find it useful:

https://themindfool.com/divine-masculine/

It begins with a VERY interesting quote by Carl Jung which resonates with me a lot:

Quote

You can hardly say of your soul what sex it is. But if you pay close attention, you will see that the most masculine man has a feminine soul, and the most feminine woman a masculine soul.

 


'When you look outside yourself for something to make you feel complete, you never get to know the fullness of your essential nature.' - Amoda Maa Jeevan

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I WAS ALWAYS IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH EXTREMELY MASCULINE MEN WHO COULD BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF OTHERS. 

 

BUT THESE SAME MEN CLAIMING HOW MASCULINE THEY WERE, ALWAYS ABUSED ME TO SHOW HOW MASCULINE THEY WERE, BEAT ME, PHYSICALLY ASSAULTED ME, VERBALLY AND EMOTIONALLY ABUSED ME TO SHOW THEIR POWER AS MEN. 

 

THE SOCIETY 'S PERCEPTION OF MASCULINITY IS SO SKEWED THAT MUCH OF WHAT IS CONSIDERED MASCULINE IS JUST PURE TOXIC. 

 

AND I MEAN FUCK YOUR DEFINITION OF MASCULINITY IF HURTING A WOMAN IS CONSIDERED MASCULINE. 

 

AGAIN, WHAT DO I GAIN BY YOUR MASCULINITY....... ABUSE?? 

 

NO SORRY DEAR PROUD MASCULINITY. 

I DON'T NEED SUCH MASCULINITY IN MY LIFE THAT MAKES ME FEEL BENEATH AS A WOMAN. 

I REJECT YOU. 

 

 

I WANT MASCULINITY THAT SUPPORTS MY FEMININITY INSTEAD OF PUTTING ME DOWN FOR BEING A FEMALE. 

 

DID YOU HEAR MY SCREAMS FOR FREEDOM FROM YOUR PATHETIC 

MASCULINITY THAT SERVES NO PURPOSE OTHER THAN ABUSING MY FEMINITY. 

 

I DON'T NEED IT. 

 

TIME FOR ME TO SAY NO TO WHATEVER HURTS ME AND STOP BEING SILENT ALL THE TIME AND GET DEMONIZED FOR STANDING UP JUST BECAUSE I'M A FEMALE, I'M NOT SUPPOSED TO BE HEARD... 

 

 

NO NO NO NO

 

HEAR ME OUT LOUD LOUD LOUD. 

I WILL SCREAM LOUDER IF YOU DON'T HEAR. 

 

MY FEMININITY WILL SCREAM EVEN  LOUDER THE MORE YOUR MASCULINITY OPPRESSES ME. 

 

I'M A FREE BIRD. I WILL ALWAYS BE. 

YOU CAN'T DICTATE MY FEMININITY TO ME. 

 

YOU CAN'T KEEP ME IN YOUR GOLDEN CAGE. I DON'T NEED YOUR CAGE.. I AM NOT YOUR OBJECT OR FUCKING DOLL.

 

I HAVE THE RIGHT TO PROTEST IF I WANT TO 

DON'T TELL ME NOT TO. 

 

DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO AS A WOMAN. 

I HAVE BEEN TOLD ALL MY LIFE WHAT TO DO AS A WOMAN BY MEN. I WANT FREEDOM FROM IT. 

I CRAVE FREEDOM. 

LIBERATION FROM SOCIAL BULLSHIT. 

 

 

I TAKE MY POWER BACK AS A WOMAN. 

I'M PROUD OF MY FEMININITY. 

I'M PROUD OF BEING A WOMAN. 

 

YOU CAN'T TELL ME WHAT'S GOOD FOR ME AND WHAT'S NOT GOOD FOR ME.. 

I KNOW WHAT IS GOOD FOR A WOMAN. 

 

 

I'M FREE FROM YOUR CAGE. 

 

I AM FREE FROM YOUR JUDGEMENT. 

 

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

 

 

I'm in love with a man who is more feminine than most men

 

I like it because it's a relief from dating those hyper masculine brawny muscular men who don't know how to respect their girlfriends, who dominate but in a low conscious manner. 

I wanted a dominating man but not an abuser. 

A man who is dominating but supportive. 

I found one 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

 

 

 

I'm in love again ❤️?

 

 

 

 

 

 

5lu2df.gif

 

 

 

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I love you infinitely. I will find you forever in every life time because you and me are one. You and me eternally breathing life and bluming 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

 

My ex used to spend too much time talking about other women than me and him. 

In the end, I discovered his cheating. 

He used to tell him that I was a jealous insecure girlfriend to feel uncomfortable about his behavior. Guess I was a jealous insecure girlfriend then. 

Better be a jealous insecure girlfriend than be a doormat where he cheats all the time and I'm not even aware of it or tolerate it. 

"jealous insecure girlfriend" is a code word for manipulation. When that word appears in a relationship, you're dealing with a narcissist who is projecting his own insecurity onto you. 

If he says "you're so jealous." 

Then your reply should be - "better not make me more jealous." 

If he says "you're insane" 

Then your reply should be "you made me so." 

I never knew how to reply to such remarks in my previous relationship where my ex would constantly call me insane for simply asking basic questions. I didn't know how to defend myself. I used to sort of believe whatever he said. 

I didn't feel any power in that relationship, never felt powerful enough to give him back, he was extremely dominating asshole. 

So i suffered a ton. I remember feeling nervous and scared all the time and my self esteem was the lowest. 

I don't ever want those days back and that mental state. 

If I ever meet that person again and he said anything to me, I feel so much empowered now that I would give him a really hard time verbally with my insults, his ego would crush to pieces. 

That's the difference between who I was 2 years ago and who I am today. 

I had a huge growth in terms of self esteem. 

Now no asshole can take my power away.. 

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I feel like I'm insanely growing with you. 

It's unbelievable. 

You are my love. 

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

 

I'd agree with whatever Vzdoh and @Ilan  say here.

Become more of a narcissist yourself. 

It's a defense mechanism. A tiny amount of narcissism is not going to hurt and gives great protection against actual narcissists. 

You basically become a servant in such relationships where that person's needs only matter and your needs are dumped. 

You also tend to attract such people, I don't mean to say that it's your fault and I don't mean to say that you are consciously attracting them, sometimes you are simply in love with someone without even realizing that they are narcissists, so not your fault, yet the mystery(of why you attract narcissists) lies  somewhere in the middle of you being unaware and you having low opinion of yourself. Both aren't your fault per se. 

Not being aware only means such experiences make you aware. This was my actually my case more than lack of self esteem. 

Having a low opinion of yourself, which is the latter case where you're quite aware that you tend to tolerate narcissists, now this is where the real risk lies, get out of it, learn to be determined and stop being a doormat to such people. 

In both cases, experience is the best teacher and you need it for a future free of narcissists

So don't beat up yourself, simply work harder on areas of awareness, boundaries and self esteem and then narcissists become a thing of the past. 

All you need is Self power and freedom from fear 

 

And you will have insane growth. 

 

 

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The magic cure to narcissism. 

If you are attracting narcissistic people, then this is the cure. 

Be so so entitled and act so entitled that the narcissist is simply bored of you 

 

Instantly kicks out every narcissist from your life.. 

 

 

Narcissists cannot stand entitlement Bwahahahahahahahahah. 

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

 more posts pending 

Posts on - 

—Learn to say no 

—When you are never taught respect 

—Why you are not selfish even when you are selfish 

 

—Cut off anything that doesn't serve your purpose 

 

 

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Learn to say no to fake friends 

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My intuition is strongest

 

If your goal is to boycott me

 

If you don't support me you are not my friend 

Tired of Fake people 

 

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The troll did a good thing. 

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Why being defensive is a good thing. 

(all those who constantly check my profile, all you hate followers) 

I don't need your goddamn attention 

The curse of being an Indian woman. 

Being hated on for your race 

When you are hated by your own men in your own country. Deal with your bias. Not my problem. 

I'm not who you think I am, and I don't need to prove it. 

 

 

Stop Bitchifying me 

 

 

I want to have a say in what's being decided about me. 

 

 

Someone said that I have an ugly personality. Come at me. C'mon. 

I had to withstand massive hate but my inner core is love. 

 

 

Are you getting an ego boost at my expense, huh? 

 

 

I'm not famous for good reasons. 

Feels good to be hated. 

 

I was suppressed for so long 

 

 

Love grows and succeeds despite hate (all the covert narcissists who love to hate me to feel good about themselves ) 

 

 

 

I'm finally growing into my own element, thanks to love and support 

 

 

I was never allowed to by myself. Only others were allowed to decide who I was or am. Never me. 

So you get to decide who I am, but not me? 

 

 

 

 

Edited by Preety_India

INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

More posts 

Part 1

 

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

More posts 

Part 2

There's so much suppressed inside of me. 

And I wanna let it all out and throw it at you 

 

Because I don't deserve how I was treated. 

 

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Fuck I love you, Preety B|


'When you look outside yourself for something to make you feel complete, you never get to know the fullness of your essential nature.' - Amoda Maa Jeevan

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!


Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.


Sign In Now