Proserpina's Journal

[Proserpina]

On 03/10/2022 at 0:57 PM, Proserpina said:

A childlike (not childish) perception makes the world very beautiful.  The divine shines through when you are not clogged up with heavy judgement and beliefs, what I often see in other people/adults. 

You can feel a divinity shining through everything. 

Just mean that childlikeness goes hand in hand with the divine similar to how turquoise or feminine development goes hand in hand/ is correlated with a relationship with the divine.  Created my own spiral of maturity that includes immaturity at the top of the spiral (joker). 

Idk felt like it.  

[Proserpina]

On the imbalance: I 'transformed' in their presence. It was almost like and due to a recontextualization and realization. They were my children. I was 'mother' and 'wife'. Some kind of hidden 'knowledge' was revealed by circumstances. Circumstances were dire seemingly, I could feel something wasn't right but nothing had come to pass. Premonitions.  So I started saying stuff to ease the energy.  The imbalance caused me to see things that weren't there because I was dealing with energies that were so 'real'.  My mind filled in the blanks.  It's hard for me to discern what the hidden knowledge was.  Something about leaning back, leaning forward, and Spirit.  I was in a world of my own, so I wasn't exactly grounded. I have entities/archetypal figures of my psychology helping me to lean back.  In reality, people are starved of this quality and it impacts everything.

Spirit/embodiment/love is like Leaning forward with a capital L.  It overrides all other forms of leaning forward.  It is superior to all other forms. If you have spirit then you can manifest entities/archetypes within your psychology to help you profoundly lean back.  I remember knowing that. 

Recontextualization plus leaning back = transformation. 

Leaning back is the key to attraction and health.  All good things flow to you.  Again, people are starved of this quality.  It requires a pure/childlike heart to enter into the cave of wonders.  The Genie (entity/archetypes of your psychology) will give you all that your heart desires. 

Of course, you can only get to that place during an imbalance usually. So you'll be coming from a place of service, selflessness, and spreading love usually. It is a natural reward, healing. If you can survive The Descent. 

I was able to heal myself through the breath of life. 

Spirit breathes life.  'Life' (Health and goodness) is then the result of that.  Breathing life - ultimate leaning forward. 

Edited October 5, 2022 by Proserpina

[Proserpina]

Chi means 'Breath' and what I call 'Breath' is actually Source.  'Life' (Chi) is something non-physical-like.  It's like electricity or energy.  Glowing.  It is life force.  Whereas what I call the 'Breath' is the Source. 

The entities/archetypes would glow with this life force. 

[Proserpina]

REPOST (EDIT) : You need a combination of Man (Life energy - masculine) and God (Breath - feminine).  

God can heal and blossom that which is Man.  And Man can inspire that which is God. 

I don't entirely understand this channeling.  It came from an alien state of consciousness and I am not versed in this stuff. 

God wants both God and Man, higher consciousness and lower consciousness, wisdom and localized intellect.  They are equal in God's eyes. Improvement/growth and no growth are also equal in God's eyes.  Masculine and feminine. God created both to be equal. 

The ultimate qualities of Man and God are Life energy and Breath.  Life energy in balance means health, beauty, and well-being.  Life energy out of balance means narcissism and self-worship.  Breath in balance is love.  Breath out of balance is pandora's box. Too much God can be negative and too much Man can be negative. 

Adam and Eve:

Eve gave Adam the forbidden fruit.  Eve actually symbolizes God and Adam symbolizes Man (Life energy).  Eve persuaded Adam to eat of the apple of Good and Evil (Breath) so that they might become Gods.  Adam then sees himself as a God and simultaneously Evil is unleashed upon the world.  Eve has been struck down and subjugated as Adam is now God and no longer seems in need of Breath, which is also threatening to him.  The masculine and patriarchal Man has been refashioned as God.

Edited October 7, 2022 by Proserpina

[Proserpina]

REPOST (EDIT): 

Quote

“Is the Unmanifested what in the East is called chi, a kind of universal life energy?”

No, it isn’t. The Unmanifested is the SOURCE of chi. Chi is the inner energy field of your body. It is the bridge between the outer you and the Source. It lies halfway between the manifested, the world of form, and the Unmanifested. Chi can be likened to a river or an energy stream. If you take the focus of your consciousness deeply into the inner body, you are tracing the course of this river back to its Source. Chi is movement; the Unmanifested is stillness. When you reach a point of absolute stillness, which is nevertheless vibrant with life, you have gone beyond the inner body and beyond chi to the Source itself: the Unmanifested. Chi is the link between the Unmanifested and the physical universe.

So if you take your attention deeply into the inner body, you may reach this point, this singularity, where the world dissolves into the Unmanifested and the Unmanifested takes on form as the energy stream of chi, which then becomes the world. This is the point of birth and death. When your consciousness is directed outward, mind and world arise. When it is directed inward, it realizes its own Source and returns home into the Unmanifested. Then, when your consciousness comes back to the manifested world, you reassume the form identity that you temporarily relinquished. You have a name, a past, a life situation, a future. But in one essential respect, you are not the same person you were before: You will have glimpsed a reality within yourself that is not “of this world,” although it isn’t separate from it, just as it isn’t separate from you.

~ Eckhart Tolle

From “The Power of Now”, Chapter 7: Portals into the Unmanifested

Brainstorm 'Life':

Chi

Life force

Life energy and Breath.  Life energy arises out of Breath. Life energy inspires more Breath.  Because it’s so beautiful God wants to create more.  She’s very creative.

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The entities/archetypes had strong Chi (life energy) and Breath.  They were very creative and loving.  They strongly breathed life energy.  They radiated Love and their core was filled with 'Love' (strong life force, Qi).  Very beautiful.  They were playful and spontaneous because of this strong life force at their core.  They were full of Life energy.

Quote

Tolle discusses body awareness as a way to the “inner body” or our life energy. Yogis call this life energy “Prana”; Buddhists use the word “Chi.” Our minds are often so busy we confuse thinking about and judging our bodies and as being “body aware,” but this is the antithesis of body attunement and awareness.

 

Edited October 7, 2022 by Proserpina

[Proserpina]

REPOST (EDIT):

Yang - Life energy

The world had grown cold.  Depressed.  I could feel it.  The planet was full of Life energy at the expense of Breath. Difficult to explain. The collective had become narcissistic (Life energy) due to too much Breath.  Without Breath Life energy started to drain.  Then there was a calling for Breath. The rebalancing involved the balance of Life energy and Breath. There were individuals who came forward who had the qualities required for the collective to have hope, love, and faith again.  Not saying I am some kind of savior but I have always had access to a level of consciousness where I could Breathe Life energy into things, where I was warmth and fullness.  Maybe in spite of my fool archetype or maybe because of it.  I don't know.  When the individuals came forward the rebalancing of the planet occurred.  I required Life energy to be heard, which my communications with my unconscious/entities provided. 

Pandora (Breath) opened pandora's box by Breathing too much Life energy.  Life energy (collective/masculine) then became stagnant, narcissistic, and self-worshipping.  Life energy is seeming perfection, not in need of Breath.  Blind to its own limitation.  Love created the Evil of this world. 

You can see The Origination Story play out in relationships between men and women.  Women are Breath and men are Life energy. 

Edited October 7, 2022 by Proserpina

[Proserpina]

I'm pointing to Shiva and Shakti.  You need both principles. 

Quote

Broadly speaking, Shakti is considered to be the cosmos itself – she is the embodiment of energy and dynamism, and the motivating force behind all action and existence in the material universe. Shiva is her transcendent masculine aspect, providing the divine ground of all being. “There is no Shiva without Shakti, or Shakti without Shiva. The two […] in themselves are One”.

You need a balance of Shiva and Shakti.  An imbalance causes 'problems'. 

They are equal. 

Balance between Yin and Yang.  Manifested (yang) and Unmanifested (Yin). 

.

Shiva and Shakti. There is no Shiva without Shakti and no Shakti without Shiva:

"The feminine/masculine labels stuck on these two approaches mean very little, but help to explain and separate two approaches. Masculine says "I am God, I seek truth". Feminine says I am creation, I seek love. Yet there is no Truth without Love. And there is no Love without Truth. 

Like in the story of Narcissus, masculine is Narcissus, Feminine is echo. There is neither narcissist nor empath, male or female, each is only embodying part of the whole, creating the other as a pointer to wholeness."

Edited October 7, 2022 by Proserpina

[Proserpina]

I think the mouse might have something to do with life energy.  When I experienced an alien consciousness and experienced the same childlike, playful, joyful energy my life energy was high.  Life energy is brought about by the unmanifested.  Life energy (Yang)  and the unmanifested (Yin) are two sides of one whole, just like Shakti and Shiva.  There is no Shakti without Shiva and there is no Shiva without Shakti.

[Proserpina]

Breath or the unmanifested means embodiment of true love in this instance.  

Edited October 11, 2022 by Proserpina

[Proserpina]

I have a lot of difficulty discerning between the two layers of mental and spiritual.

Mental:

• speaking one on one
• ‘entities’
• assistance /angels

 spiritual:

•  experiences of love and oneness
•  intuition
•  premonitions 
• correction of imbalance
• yin and yang
• coincides with mental usually

The mental and spiritual planes are not so separated and unique.  They can influence each other.

Spiritual plane deals with yin and yang energies/entities and other similar energies.  It’s more in line with the heart and intuition than the head.  Far more subtle.

I’ve channeled/was aware of spirits but the moment it got really personal then it entered into the mental planes.

Mental plane:

• Fantasy
• A shallowness
• Detailed
• Personal
• Mirroring ( can mirror the gifts of its host, as in the case with angels and assisting beings)

The mental plane is extraordinarily fun and fantastical if you are a spiritual person and can separate reality from the mental plane.  Its an amusement park for the spiritual person.

Quote

The trance was similar to a mother seeing her child being endangered. She'll move heaven and earth to protect her child. The embodiment/realization due to events/preferences was always within her, she just needed a reason for it to activate.

Wrote this just after leaving a major trance. 
“She’ll move heaven and earth to protect her child” - heaven is mental plane. Utilising mental plane and angels.
“The embodiment/realization due to events/preferences was always within her” -  the mental plane was always there

Edited October 11, 2022 by Proserpina

[Proserpina]

My primary mode and experience is in the mental plane.  However I am deeply connected to the spiritual, but not in terms of channeling but in terms of accountability.  If something is wrong in the energy, I act quickly.  I can’t read energy very well though.

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Body awareness seems to increase life energy.  I’m fundamentally interested in increasing life energy.  Self-love is the fastest way to increase it. 

Edited October 11, 2022 by Proserpina

[Proserpina]

Spiritual plane

Mental plane

[Proserpina]

Just an update as to what I've been doing. 

Today I was practising tuning into the angelic consciousness -Breath- on the mental plane (at least that's what it tells me, that it's a reflection) by noting all words around me.  All words are now embedded with angelic consciousness, Breath.  I'm hoping by tuning in I can increase my self love and therefore increase life energy.  

• Synchronicity increases with contact.   I think synchronicity means increased communication with mental plane, specifically angelic consciousness.  
• I'm hoping it will spread from words to other things, like people.  It seemed to be doing so today. 

Update: Yes it does spread to other things,  it spreads like wildfire.  This might be a solution to my sometimes depressive state.

• Angelic consciousness is the true self of the cognitive entities in my psyche.  It is the spiritual plane peaking through, since all is Breath and angelic consciousness is Breath. They are awakened aspects within me reflected back to me. The mental and spiritual plane cross over.

• Techniquely angelic consciousness is on the spiritual plane since it is Breath and Breath is Love and ‘experiences of love and oneness’ are under the spiritual plane.  However I receive information that they are reflections and simultaneously on the mental plane.

Edited October 12, 2022 by Proserpina

[Proserpina]

The end times and the fluidity of the universe

I think as well the universe is very fluid and open and forgiving imo.  If a group or even one individual is able to break a part the energy at the root even when all others are blind by teaching the importance of love and self love then it can all be effectively reversed even if it seemingly doesn’t make sense for that to be the case.  A time line shift can occur.  Higher forces give way as the Truth is given primary importance in the population subconsciously and a timeline shift occurs.  Surprisingly people really care about the truth and balancing out the yin and yang forces subconsciously when the situation begins to slowly slip, acting in unison. This is my experience.  It is quite profound to watch. 

 

 

Edited October 13, 2022 by Proserpina

[Proserpina]

Things I want to explore: 

• The collective subconscious
• Timeline shifts/dream shifts (my very first hypothesis/observation- who am I to question my original hypothesis?)
• Synchronicity (causing madness and false ideas?)

Maybe I'm becoming more unwell since I want to explore these ideas. Or maybe I'm becoming more well.  

Even if I'm contradicting myself and have false understanding I'm fleshing out something and learning new concepts along the way. 

I feel like maybe there never were 'entities' to begin with but timeline shifts (and a combination of the above three).  Even if I sound totally insane.  That's how I genuinely feel.  
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Those three don’t completely explain my second half and third experience.  Basically in retrospect and with deep perspective I realise I went mad (possibly due to the dream shifts).  I’m ready to own that.

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First experience: dream shift

 First half of second experience: dream shift

Second half of second experience: ‘entities’ (mental plane/madness)

Third experience: ‘entities’ (mental plane/madness)

Edited October 13, 2022 by Proserpina

[Proserpina]

How timeline shifts work

A great negative energy to be shifted becomes apparent, as well as a calling by the collective and the person is given a choice whether or not to lift the energy by either pointing it out (as the prophets did) or speaking the truth or pushing the collective to integrate both yin and yang.  Normally this individual may just have a gift of speaking the energy away, without having to say anything in particular.  Once the energy shifts a GREAT peace comes and there is no doubt that outside resources and solutions are found.  I suspect book of revelations were shifts not only visions.

But yeah, mostly deals with significant energies

 Also there is a literal timeline shift that goes with the energy.  People forget events.  I think the prophet remains aware because he is just more conscious.

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On Crucifixion and self sacrifice

I'm beginning to think perhaps the crucifixion was prolonged, with a mixture of madness (although hard to tell).  And perhaps it will continue to be prolonged and it is a part of my path.  Crucifixion is many things.  It's the egoic backlash from the collective, it is the natural pain and madness (consequence) of coming up against dark forces, it is your ugliness suddenly on display in the presence of shallow and dark forces and being mocked and ridiculed for that.  The Great Peace does not completely irradicate the darkness, only makes it manageable and once you lose your strength after the great peace you are vulnerable and the dark forces lay prey to you. 

The suffering isn't necessarily something you take onto yourself, it sort of just happens inadvertently. 

Edited October 14, 2022 by Proserpina

[Proserpina]

Advice for channeling

•  self love (no 1.)
• await an imbalance
• Body awareness
• Chakra work, spinal work
• unconditional love (not to get get anything or anywhere)

You need a pure heart to be utilised by the collective/higher forces.  Only then can you prove that you can transmute.  You have to prove yourself.  Let your heart be pure, think not ill of your brethren.  Forgiveness.  
.

Quote

On Crucifixion and self sacrifice

I'm beginning to think perhaps the crucifixion was prolonged, with a mixture of madness (although hard to tell).  And perhaps it will continue to be prolonged and it is a part of my path.  Crucifixion is many things.  It's the egoic backlash from the collective, it is the natural pain and madness (consequence) of coming up against dark forces, it is your ugliness suddenly on display in the presence of shallow and dark forces and being mocked and ridiculed for that.  The Great Peace does not completely irradicate the darkness, only makes it manageable and once you lose your strength after the great peace you are vulnerable and the dark forces lay prey to you. 

The suffering isn't necessarily something you take onto yourself, it sort of just happens inadvertently. 

You give off an ‘energy’ that others pick up on and which feeds the madness.  A perfect combination of actual hell and madness.

Current reality is still bordering on completely off the rails and dire concerning the world at large. I can sense that, the energies. That is separate from the crucifixion and it might have been a part of the second half of my second experience and the third experience when the energies became really severe.

 Dealing with two new possibilities: 

crucifixion 

energy of the planet

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Actually what loba said got me thinking perhaps I did/do make an agreement to take on the suffering of the world or the like and so I am aware of the energy unlike others.  Maybe it was predestined.  I know a pure heart is directly related to the ability to see negative energy.   You are more sensitive.  A pure heart always rang as self sacrificing to me.  Your body takes on the brunt of the self sacrifice and can become sick.  

Negative energies are there for me to absorb and transmute and transform.  The smell of death I was told is also negative energy.  Everything vibrates with negative energy - cars, keys, electronics, birds, people.

I remember trying to meditate it all away constantly but really there was no need.

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I think there is nothing I’m more passionate about than moving energy.  

Edited October 14, 2022 by Proserpina

[Proserpina]

I feel like a lot of my ‘disabilities’/difficulties exist since I was a child in order to be transmuted.  I have difficulties inherited from my father.  I see transmutation as deep absorption by a pure being and then purification from within, surfacing the qualities through the filter and lense of a pure being, impacting the energy of the collective.

 

Edited October 14, 2022 by Proserpina

[Proserpina]

The two reasons I lost my freedom, was placed on an order and lost my spiritual gifts:

1. Walking on the road (did this once) 

I had spent the night in complete agony and madness, without any family support, homeless, lost my keys, wallet.  The darkness was making sounds so I huddled up near a street light near the side of the road.  After many long hours of this, stuck in contemplation, I finally had the insight to lean into the darkness and madness.  It all flees when you lean in.  I laid down on the road and stared at a brick.  Then I gathered up more courage to face the cars head on that were rattling with negative energy and threatening to kill me. So I began walking on the roads.  There was a giant graffiti on the side of the road that said ‘voluntary suicide’ and that’s what I called it, voluntary suicide.  The spirits/signs congratulated me on my courage but after the police caught me and sent me to the hospital they recommended I practice with birds and off of the roads.

2. Inappropriate sexual conduct in hospital

Sexuality is the fastest way to shift energy (a nightmare at the very end of psychosis taught me that, where I had sex with Satan with a drill in the background - drills symbolised death).  And I was in the worst experience of my entire life.  I genuinely thought I was going to be raped and murdered because of a core major belief in the Unification.  The unification was the major belief that the whole planet was awakening and unifying on all levels, including sexually.  But that in some spheres sexuality had become corrupted and the need to unify had turned into rape.  I thought perhaps if I committed ‘voluntary suicide’ by offering myself up I would be spared the rape.  After that they forcefully jabbed me and placed me on an order.  The frightening thing is, I predicted the jab.  The jab was a part of what the darkness threatened to do to me. Paralyse me then rape me.  I still think sometimes that if I hadn’t offered myself/shifted the energy that the jab would have paralysed me instead of saved me and I would have been raped on another plane of existence.

“It was what got me through a hellish experience but no one will believe me of course and everything shifted to where it never happened.  Sexuality has a way of shifting higher dimensions.  So I did that.  Strange men in black who I didn't know but apparently knew me took me so it resulted in that.  

"Extreme times call for extreme measures"

It was like a ritual.  ”

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Spider is going to get you

first paralyse you

 then wrap you up

 and feast on you

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Okay.  I genuinely don’t know if I was mad or had delusions or not.  I didn’t act crazy except for meditating with my hands ( fos ro dah! ).  That’s the point when you’re crazy, you don’t know.  Now that might be because crazy doesn’t exist and we’ve been gaslit, after all consciousness can pretty much do anything.  My heart won’t tell me, it keeps flip flopping.

Edited October 15, 2022 by Proserpina

[Proserpina]

So then was the whole mental and spiritual thing untrue?  At that level of consciousness (whether it was lower or higher, my state has changed recently) it was accurate.  There are progressions of truth on the path as you evolve and shift up and down in consciousness.  It depends when my depot is due, my consciousness tends to raise later in the month with symptoms (sychronicity, negative energy).  Also the feminine cycles. My truth right now is that I wasn't crazy and it did happen. 

I have a lot of understanding for those who are ‘crazy’ and ‘mentally ill’.  I’m not sure why they allow the system to push them around.  Many, many are not in fact crazy.  Suffering, yes.  Not crazy.

I was recently weaned off my mood stabiliser and I didn’t take my new medication for two days.  That might be why.

Edited October 15, 2022 by Proserpina