Dealing with humiliation

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Through out my life time, especially during high school, I have experienced very humiliating situations which took a huge toll on my mind to the point where I have frequent moments of low self-esteem and high levels of anxiety. I won't go into too much detail about them but one of them involved sexual references (on-stage performance), so whenever I have sexual thoughts, the humiliating feeling of moment keeps coming up and its unbearable. Because of these situations, I have a problem with people thinking of judging me all the time. I am now well out of high school but still have panic attacks if I see the people I know from high school as I associate them with the humiliating experiences, even though I hardly see them nowadays. Do you people know how to overcome the feeling of humiliation for good and adopt mindsets which help me let go of these experiences? Thanks so much. 

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@Ross Humiliation sucks, I am familiar with it as well. Consider to stop taking yourself too seriously and please stop giving so much authority to others! As if what some high-schoolers thought of you in the past matters matters now. Do you think so? Have those incidents been brought up verbally running into people from high school? Probably not.

Try something for me, take a moment to go back to those events and pretend you aren't yourself for the time being. Imagine it from someone else's perspective, is there any humor to be found? I mean really be honest about it, then ask yourself if you were that person looking at someone else in that situation would you laugh? Don't dwell on the details too much, this is just an exercise to get you to detach emotionally and to stop caring so much as to what happened. You'll find that it's merely your perspective that needs to be changed, because the past can't be.

Ultimately you need to learn to truly accept the past for exactly what it is and that things happened. They don't define anything about your current identity, unless you let them, and keep propagating it every time the memory comes to your mind. Events come and go and are largely out of our control, that's ok! Remember your self-esteem is exactly that, how you regard yourself. Regardless of what shitty situation is thrown at you or the things that are said to you, you can use the power of your mind to cut through all that and accept yourself exactly as you are.

Time should heal this wound, but you need to let it.




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