I'm identifying as the contents of the present

[JumboEukaryote]

I saw that past and future are imagined. I now seem to be identifying heavily with the content of the current present moment.

I feel like I am my surroundings and current train of thought/everything in awareness. But not the present over all time, just the single moment I'm in at any point. I feel like I won't experience the future, that it's just imagined in this moment.

This is manifesting in extreme impatience and an inability to concentrate or work towards the future.

Sometimes it's so bad I feel extreme resistance to even changing train of thought or anything about this moment, in a fear of death sense, like doing something different or thinking a different thought will be death. This is worst when procrastinating, I get locked in and feel like to stop procrastinating would bring a kind of death...

I think I had a timelessness insight without any ego death. So I feel like a human with no future haha.

If anyone has suggestions on what to contemplate/practise to resolve this I'd be very grateful. I have a lot of uni work due soon so not being able to concentrate is a problem.

Thanks.

Edited April 11, 2020 by JumboEukaryote
Clarify title

[Sahil Pandit]

@JumboEukaryote 40 minutes of do nothing. Slow down as much as you can. 

Just "BE" for a while.

[VeganAwake]

@JumboEukaryote What does 'I' look and feel like?

What is I?

Its not the body...

What is identified with the present moment?

Not talking about Consciousness either...

 

 

Edited April 12, 2020 by VeganAwake

[Barna]

Welcome to the forum @JumboEukaryote  

I think I know what you're talking about, I've been in a similar situation two weeks ago.

For me, the only way out was through. I let myself identify with the present moment, and I did some self-inquiry to see what is exactly part of this present moment. I found that the physical sensations are obviously part of it: sight, sounds touch, taste, smell. The breath is also part of it. The silence is also part of it. But also, every thought is part of it, and every emotion is part of it. The thoughts about the future are part of the present moment, and the felt stress about the future is also part of the present moment... The stressful thoughts and emotions about the future were causing an uncomfortable unease in the present and that didn't feel healthy, so I started focusing on healing it. Note, that all of this was happening without ever leaving with my attention the present moment. While focusing on healing the stressful feelings, a question came into my mind: 
"How would it feel in the present moment to work towards the future goal that I'm stressed about right now?"
I found out that it felt relieving. And there I was, working on an imagined future only because it felt like a relief from the stress in the present moment. 

I think it's a very good practice to focus solely on the present, you just have to make sure to include absolutely everything that's happening in it. Don't ignore any thought or feeling, address everything that's causing an unease right now.

I hope this was helpful