Victor Mgazi

Is suicide ego driven?

23 posts in this topic

As somebody who has felt suicidal it's driven by the biologically wired emotions and instincts we evolved as animals to want to fit in and be part of the pack, to feel accepted. It's really a cry for attention or the final result when we don't get attention, feel outcasted, and feel powerless to do anything about it.

For most men the cause is no woman in their life or the love of their life betraying them.. most men really need that emotional connection, more than women realize, but women are biologically wired to want dominance and want the man all other women are chasing... the dominant bad boy alpha type. Combined with surplus of men from no wars killing off the surplus males leading to a surplus of men and many of these men being weak or lacking a personality and it leads to a lot of frustrated men. Nature is harsh, boys.

It's the limbic brain (our mammalian brain and all it's emotional drives)  and the thoughts of the prefrontal cortex (consciousness and thought) mixing in a toxic brew is really what it is. Once you get into a habitual thought pattern it can be hard to see any other perspective. It happens more to people who isolate themselves because an outside perspective is the best way to break free of that record groove of habitual negative thinking, combined with our strong genetic urge to want to be part of something.

I've found Leo's audio combined with "theredpill" subreddit to be some of the most useful information in my life, along with information on how the limbic brain works, the dopamine reward system, and evolutionary psychology.

 

Edited by sholomar

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Okay, so I've sat, introspected and contemplated on this topic trying to figure out how ego can drive one to a suicidal point.

And after having tried to bring this case as close to experience as I possibly could through imagination and introspection, I realized that the only thing that would drive me to commit suicide is having to not fulfil my passion and somehow not live my life persuing my objective/will.

Through these thoughts and feelings I realized that I would rather die than not explore this world we call reality and not tell stories. At the core of what I think to be my soul is a burning and very powerful desire or vision of exploring every world, every realm, every plane of existence and field of knowledge to the best of my ability, and then come back and share with whomever I can what I'd discovered in a very creative way whenever possible. 

That's what's driving me to live and endure every shitty moment that gets thrown at me. So I imagine doing anything but that would be driving me to die. Although, all that was still imaginary so in real life I know that what I would actually do is fight for my vision with every breath I had - even my last one. But that's just me. I'm sure there are other things that would drive one to a suicidal point like the feeling of not being loved or something as intense as that.

So I guess not doing doing or fulfilling what you've deemed to be your purpose somehow makes the ego disfunctional which then leads to it's own self destruction..? I don't know.

All I know is that if I were to have the closest, if not essential, thing to who I am or what defined my life removed - that would drive me insane.. and possibly dead. 

But all this just makes me wonder whether or not there is a deeper purpose to the ego, or whatever this biological mechanism is ,besides survival. I mean I don't know about every one else but I wouldn't care much about my life if it felt pointless. Not a damn much. 

So yeah, that's wassup ?

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