Trip Report on LSD - Kundalini, Chakra Restrictions and Ghosts

[King Merk]

Hey y'all, here's a trip report pulled straight from my commonplace book. I'm quite ignorant on the subjects of kundalini, chakras and Daniel M. Ingram. Any feedback/suggested resources would be appreciated. Thanks(: 

---------------------------

It's 8:30pm and I'm about to drop a tab of acid. My spiritual growth since my last "awakening" experience has been surreal. I've grown exponentially. I've developed more spiritually in the last month and a half than I have in any other period of my life…. Time to dive the fuck in and go even deeper.

So, questions I'll be seeking insights into:

1. How can I be more loving and accepting of others?

2. How can I live more authentically? 

3. How can I "be" more? How do I separate the thing itself from the concept I create/attach to it?

----------------------------

Okay, it's 5pm on Saturday. Trip report time. My trip can be divided into two very distinct portions.

I started the trip by setting my intent and taking the tab. I put my headphones in and began to meditate. I lied on the ground meditating for about an hour and a half. It was great and I got some solid insights into how I can be more loving and accepting of others simply by becoming more conscious. Less ego, less judgment. I really embodied love while laying on the floor then. I loved everything. I even wrestled with my dog biscuit for a while. Like a long while. This state of surrendering to what is/accepting the now was very nice and something I need to focus on doing more in my day to day life. I also realized I need to start reaching out to my friends more often, to seek intimate conversation with them. I'm naturally prone to be hermit like and wall myself off from others. That’s my default tendency.

 

While meditating, I got a rush of energy travelling up my body. I'd never thought about it before but this happens pretty frequently for me. It happens multiple times every time I trip but also randomly when I'm sober. I'll have a "wave" of chilling energy that makes my shoulders elevate and my entire upper body shake left and right like I'm a salsa dancer or a snake slivering across the ground or some shit. I was blown away by the fact that I'd never really took notice to this phenomenon before. I intuitively thought this could be "kundalini" energy? (I haven't research this phenomenon much at all). This spurred me to do Osho's kundalini meditation I learned from Elliott. It was great. I was able to entirely step back and surrender control of my body. The music/energy took over my movements. I shook and shook and shook some more. It was interesting not having control of my body. I was simply watching it all happen. I still was thinking but I wasn’t moving consciously. It's like I was pure mind during the meditation.

While doing the kundalini meditation, I felt this huge restriction around my waistline. Everything else in me felt very expansive but my waist area felt as if I had a band wrapped around it that was restricting expansion. This caused me to desire to ejaculate (which I didn’t) but it was interesting to say the least. I desired deeply to have a "release" in this area which felt heavily sexual. Could this be a blockage in my sacral chakra? Was that what I was feeling? Definitely something to look into.

 

As a funny side note before I transition into the second half of the trip, I somehow convinced myself that I wasn’t very high during my acid trip. Between hours 1-3ish from when I took my tab I felt strangely sober. I felt much clearer and coherent than I typically do while tripping. I even had a deep desire to be at the ocean because I felt like I was a gigantic whale swimming through the ocean (real sober right? LOL). I knew the ocean was only a 3 hour drive if I went out to my truck. I then entertained the thought of driving to the coast so I could go meditate on the beach while tripping and conclusively decided it was a bad idea because I would crash and die before I got there and I have much more work to do in life. Back to the "serious" stuff.

 

We now transition into the "second phase" of the trip at about 3.5 hours in. I've often heard Frank Yang speak of the "Dark night of the soul" as a phase of conscious development. I remember he posted link on IG to a video of Daniel M Ingram, the man who created the "mind map" that references the dark night phase of awakening. I pulled up a vimeo video Ingram has posted explaining his mind maps. Note: I had no prior knowledge of Ingram and his maps. This was entirely intuitive and spur of the moment. It blew my fucking mind. I've never heard someone discuss awareness like Daniel Ingram. I understood none of what he was saying but it all felt so right and accurate.

 

I can't put into words what exactly happened for hour 3.5-4.5ish but it was scary as fuck. I was convinced that the world around me wasn't real… I mean it was still there. My room was still present in my awareness. But I saw through it. Not as a belief. Not as a philosophy. But real as fuck, that it's all….idk? Something? Really unreal? Something other than what it is when I'm sober, that's for sure. It's like I died. And I wined like a little bitch during the process. I begged for my life. After I gave in, I was convinced I was enlightened and leaving this earth/human realm. I'd transcended. I went to text my buddy to ask if all of this was real but I stopped myself because it was so obviously real so there was no point in messaging my non existent friend. It was obvious that I would never be "Marcus" again and that I had transcended into whatever. It was quite the mind fuck.

 

I continued on studying Daniel Ingram's work for literally the next 6 hours. I read portions of his books, watched his vimeo videos, listened to a podcast he's done and even checked the actualized forum for content on him. Oh and I bought his book. It should be in next week. He's an interesting character. Very technical on the meditation side. A self proclaimed pragmatist, he "focuses on results and drops dogmatism". He is however deeply entrenched in Buddhism so many of the shit he's talking about (Jhana, dharma, nana, etc) I don’t understand do to lack of knowing terminology. That being said I'm willing to sift through it and see what's there. He seems to be a very deep stage turquoise individual and hopefully a great resource in my awakening process. We shall see.

 

As another side note, I felt completely hopeless during this second phase. I felt as if everything I know, all the work I've done up to this point is useless. I felt like my world was flipped upside down and I'd have to clean it all away. Now that I'm sober I don’t necessarily believe that but it was an interesting feeling of deep despair/hopelessness that I don’t often feel.

 

There's something of value for me in looking into chakras, kundalini and various other "woo-woo" phenomenon. There are other realms that can be accessed through elevated states of consciousness.

I don't wish to diverge from my trip too far but his explains why I would see ghosts and feel entities as a child. Funny, actually not funny at all, but I just remembered my old house that I have strong memories of seeing ghosts and feeling "things" in, was the site of a murder. I remember my mom telling me this when I was younger. Apparently the previous inhabitant was a man and his child. Thee man killed his child by putting him in a boiling hot bath tub. Yikes… And I also remember when we were pulling up the carpet to stain the concrete floors and there was a massive blood stain in the living room floor and it scared me. However I would see ghosts and speak with entities at other houses and locations so I know it wasn’t a simply localized phenomenon. But definitely enhanced there. I remember at my other house I lived in a few years later, the entities of a native American tribe would stand at the wood line and watch me play basketball on my goal. They'd only show up at dusk/night and I wouldn’t dare go into the forest at night. In fact, the day after I went camping back there (the first and last time I did this) I found a fucking soaking wet goat laying on the forest floor with his neck broke and twist all the way around. A very real, non ghost goat.. The whole "ghost realm" is creepy as fuck and I do not understand it at all. I probably wouldn’t even believe in it if I hadn't experienced it for myself. Kind of glad I can't access it any more. Anyways, excuse the tangent.

 

Overall this trip was great. It gave me new resources/leads to go down, a newfound inspiration to get more serious about the technical aspects of my meditation practices, motivated me to seriously go do a vipassana retreat and provided me with some specific steps I can take to live a more authentic and loving life.

Edited November 24, 2019 by King Merk

[ShugendoRa]

k

[SpiritualAwakening]

Thanks 4 sharing bud, goodluck