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Lynnel

Journaling for processing the past or getting stuck in the past ?

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I've been thinking lately about doing a retreat where I would journal about my whole life story and meditate only to reprocess everything on a feeling level, with maybe bits of shamanic breathing.

What I'm afraid though is giving more power to the past instead of releasing it. Like instead of clearing my past I would get more stuck in it while journaling about it which would have the opposite effect.

Like I'd like to clear all of my emotionnal baggage from my past and like be able to fully think about it without having intense emotions come up - basically a mix of hurt, wounds, boredom, low self-esteem, emotionnal pain, etc. I want to fully integrate the past so that it will have only a positive influence with the lessons, but I seem to very often be stuck on certains events unable to process them as I think about them over and over again.

I'm sure psychedelics will help me with this but I wanna also put a lot of work myself and do my homework instead of just relying on one tool to do the job :)

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Life will illuminate your past pains. All you need to do is feel your emotions fully as they arise. It's a much more direct path.

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@Lynnel

I'd  recommend starting small - for example, break up your life into the various stages and take them one at a time, perhaps for shorter periods.  It seems like a mammoth task introspecting and processing your whole life at once though YMMV.

From experience, I tend to get overwhelmed when I set huge goals and I find that for me to feel really great about introspection I have to be willing to allow the process which can tend to run DEEP. Something small may take you somewhere unexpected and you need to give it room to breathe and  manifest so you can process it well. 

 

Take your time, re-integration won't happen overnight. It's a process, enjoy the journey. 

 

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