Let's settle this, bugs!

[okulele]

A message to my little scared self

"Here, everything is ok.

 

  Can I stay for just a while?

  please don't send me back out there.

  There are problems

  thousands issues

  millions choices to consider...

  Let me stay here for a little.

 

  You can stay my little darling,

  you can stay all day long,

  but if life keeps on calling,

  you must go, oh you must go.

  Just remember, little child,

  you can come at any time.

  Here, everything is ok."

[okulele]

Boredom

Sometimes a state comes, where I feel bored. There is nothing to do. Nothing worthwhile at least. There is really nothing. And it is terrible. Or is it?

-What is so terrible?

-Well, the nothing. The lack. The emptiness.

-Ok, let's have a look.

When I have a look at the ugly, terrible emptiness, it is not so bad at all. It is just empty. And with time, it becomes even quite cozy. So what was so painful, if not the emptiness? Well, the thought of it.

Edited May 7, 2018 by okulele

[okulele]

I am free

Beautiful words. Thank you for the reminder!

[okulele]

The play of the mind

"The mind is racing

 peace is here.

 So much chatter,

 but it's still.

 All this chaos,

 amongst order.

 Feeling bound,

 without border."

[okulele]

The crushing lack of purpose

The only real purpose I seem to have is consciousness work. And that really is a kind of purposeless purpose. At times, this becomes very crushing and I see the incredible value of a life purpose. Of a compass, a mission, a dream. If I don't really focus my attention on a predetermined goal what is there to keep me going in times of trouble? What is there to keep me going when everything seems to be meaningless? Well, nothing.

I have been resisting looking deeply into the matter of life purpose for a long time. A part of me is saying, that it is just a mind game and I should focus on consciousness. And it is a mind game! But it does not make it inferior in any way. I have this mind, I have this life, I have the opportunity to act and create. And I clearly see that it does not REALLY collide with consciousness work. These are two different levels. I can be conscious and at the same time allow myself to create something meaningful inside of this beautiful illusion. What would be the point of playing, if I am not taking part really?

[okulele]

Walking, Being

I am walking, yet I am just being.

I am sitting, yet I just am.

All is flowing, all is being.

All is beauty, all I am?

[okulele]

Purpose vs Purposelessness

My two previous posts show my two selves. One is of the beauty, of the being, of the peace and of the all. The other is a self which wants to be human, wants to interact and give, wants to be a badass and show the world what it is about, wants to make a difference and wants to be seen and heard.

Both of them are me it seems, although each in it's own way. How do I strike a balance between the two?

[okulele]

The chi master - Paul Chek

 

It is mind blowing for me to see this different side to spirituality. Enlightenment is not the only thing out there to explore. There seems to be a whole world of possibilities connected to a balanced 6th chakra.

[okulele]

Double slit experiment

I was inspired to look into this experiment by a topic created on this forum about quantum mechanics books.

This is kind of crazy. That is what I am experiencing. It seems like a crazy, mystical thing that I discovered, yet it was revealed to science! My god! How come our society is still the same if this is taught in schools? Well I know how. Nobody gets it. I remember the time my high school teacher was telling us about this experiment. It baffled me and I asked - "How?". He said he had no idea.

So it was revealed to the public, but I think it is mostly seen as just a weird thing and not many people take it seriously. But it should be taken VERY seriously. It proves that we are in a dream world. This world is NOT solid. Matter is a joke! Oh my god!

[okulele]

Anti-fungal diet

It has been almost 3 weeks since the start of the diet and I see great improvement in my health. Mostly my gut health. Although it is not perfect at all, it has become tolerable.

Cutting sugar and grains helped me a lot. A few times I had some fruit (raisins yesterday), but that seems to be ok. I am using probiotics now to help healthy gut fauna to grow again. Soon I will start with using citrus seed extract, which is supposed to crush the fungi!

[okulele]

The willingness to be

Since the end of the darkness retreat something has changed. It is not a big change, it's more like a shift. I am much more conscious. I am aware of my being more deeply and more... let's say frequently. I do not get dragged too deeply into my mind usually and if I do, it doesn't last long.

What happened? What made the difference? I just became willing to be. Being became much more interesting than my problems.

Edited May 11, 2018 by okulele

[okulele]

Expressing myself

"I see beauty all around me

 I know peace is here.

 How to show you, my dear friends

 What I really feel?"

I have a need to create. I am sure a lot of you, dear readers, can relate. Upon examining, this need stems from my awe of the world. This world, this reality is not an ordinary place. In fact it seems most extraordinary! And that is still a word not strong enough. When I look at the world I see amazing, fascinating masterpiece. There is a mystery here. One would think that if I look closer, the mystery will be solved. It is not the case in my experience! The closer I look, the more mysterious the mystery gets. The deeper I go, the less I know. And the more I want to show my awe to the world.

[okulele]

There is a treasure inside you. Just have a look

[okulele]

Have a piece of peace

I would like everyone to feel this peace. All I want is for everyone to be able to live this peace. It is what everyone wants. It is what everyone CAN have! It is right here for me, then it has to be here for you also. And for him. And even for her. All I want to do is share this peace. Is to show this peace.

So... here you go! A piece of peace! Take it, enjoy it

[okulele]

Being perfect

Actualized.org changed my life in a dramatic way. It gave me the desire and the will to do something with this life. And it is amazing. However, often times I fall into the trap of needing to be perfect.

My need to be perfect is a very subtle occurrence. From outside it seems like a very noble thing. I am planning out, strategizing, pushing myself. And that would be nice, but in the background, there is a certain feeling. It is not pleasant.

Where is the issue? The issue is the reason for which I choose to act. When I have the need to be perfect, the reason lurking behind the scenes is the old, anxious guy - Mr. Fear.

[okulele]

On being a fool

"I will surrender, I know I'll do!

 I'll try so hard, I'll break right through.

 With all my strength, with all my skill,

 I'll give away my own damn will.

 And so I sit, and so I try,

 And nothing works, I want to cry.

 So I give up, can't take no more.

 I see no way to reach my core.

 And right this moment, something is gone.

 It's I that's missing, life is a song."

[okulele]

The highest mountain

I was told of a certain mountain. It was told to hold the most beautiful view as it was the tallest mountain in the world.

I was hooked. I must reach that mountain! And I started looking. I was looking far and wide!

There were so many mountains around me! Maybe this one? No, not that high. Then is it this one? No, not this one either. It's quite small actually.

I kept searching and searching. But all around me all the mountains seemed small and disappointing. How sad I was.

Shouldn't it be simple to find the tallest mountain? How come everywhere I look, I look down? Why can't I find the highest spot?

And then it hit me - I am standing on top of the highest mountain, that is why everything I look at looks tiny in comparison. And the view I was looking for, was what I was looking at the whole time.

[okulele]

In times of trouble, it is still here

I am feeling tired. I woke up feeling tired. My legs feel heavy. I feel clumsy. Life is not always happy. Life is not always easy. Life is not always pleasurable. Fortunately there is a place here, which IS always happy, easy, pleasurable. Or maybe not. But it is still. It is very still and it holds me anchored in the darkest of times.

My body can be weak. Yet it is here.

My mind can be helpless. Yet it is here.

The world can be cruel. Yet it stays right were it has always been!

And when I forget. When I get lost in the dream again, it's ok. Because as soon as I remember, it is where it has always been. Right here.

Thank you amazing whatever-you-are!

[okulele]

Gon Freecss

I really like this character. He is open and cheerful. He takes life with a smile on his face. He is up for any adventure and seems to be unable to give up or let anything get him down.

He is innocent. He is real. He has the beginner's mind. Seriously, he has the beginner's mind! He is way to clean and pure for his world. And that is why he attracts everyone the way he does. All beings are attracted to pureness

 

[okulele]

On 5/5/2018 at 1:33 AM, pluto said:

 

Thank you dear pluto. This made my morning much, much smoother