Life keeps getting easier and easier

[khalifa]

It's been 2 years since I've first found leo from a simple google search regarding time management. As i heard his video it was logical,simple and straightforward, at the end of his video he mentioned changing 'our' life for the better if we were to self actualize. Now that's where my journey started. I've been binging on his videos ever since then from 4 to 8 hours a day, Eventually cycled through his whole content 3 times as i took frequent 1 hour walks. Got done with 20+ on his book list. Started watching all his weekly's ever since then. It has been quite a journey for this story character. There were no mistakes on this path, it was just another experience of being experiencing myself as a part of the whole sea. Although i personally dislike bad health as I've messed up my body on various supplements and nootropics experimenting to be some sort of super human, It had terrible side effects on my body. from tinnitus to various organ body damage, I'm still recovering slowly via healthy plant based diet eating fasting 23hours to 48hours a day for over 500 days now, everything's fine. It's kind of funny how i set such a path for myself on purpose yet i whine about it and i forget unconsciously that I've signed up for this. It just feels so real it's quite funny. This is just a dreamstate and this is where i just have to relax in and just enjoy the ride it's that simple really.

Although back then I never knew that i would whine constantly and i seeked so called 'enlightment' 'no self' true self whatever you call it. Binged on mooji,rupert spira,eckhart tollie,adyashanti,sadhguru etc etc (probably like 200+ vids watched lol) read spirtual enlightenment related books jedmckenna/adyashanti's/samharris etc etc.

I never even trusted myself for a long time, I've always been on guard on self-deception ever since i noticed the subconscious mind controls most of my day, it took me a long time until i said alright it is done, i allow myself to be trusted. I've been living on such pain for a long time being skeptic almost 24/7 everyday for a year was quite something.

Even as leo has shot his future videos, i've already had some idea from how much self actualizing, i've been doing from spirituality to his 5 star books that it just felt like i have barely been learning anything new for quite a while, maybe his insights are more detailed yet i felt ahead and already over thought his topics for months before him even mentioning them. Even though he's already mentioned he does this just for show it's not really that serious, and I agree it's just for entertainment reasons and it's quite high quality entertainment. Life is pretty much what you make out of it in your perspective, our thoughts create our reality as much as those are the basics it's fundamentally quite true.

As for no self, or the perceiver mode, I eventually found it but in concept and it never really lasted much even after some awakenings. Recently i've experienced the more profound ones that are long lasting and let me even control the very dreamstate, it's quite something and this is where my life just keeps getting easier and easier, I want to thank my luck in the universe that has guided me to this random me on the internet. Somehow i eneded up on a page where he would journal his life with a mere 20ish views on his webpage. I eventually pm'd him reached out and ever since then i've learnt a lot more than i ever have in such a short amount of time. All that seeking isn't in vain but it's rather a phase of growing up certain aspects of my knowledge graph.

He's helped me harness the elephant in the room, I really enjoy using occult magicka transforming this very dream state to my liking, Life just doesn't feel like a chore to me ever since then. I love playing with my invisible muscles, it's just so much better that way. I have less fear.

I'm dropping my double major engineering degree now, as i realize i don't need it, The only reason i picked it was because i thought the world needs some saving, Boy i was naive, I've gotten it all wrong, the world doesn't need any of that it's perfect the way it is. It's already just my playground it's only me playing with myself, I've set it this way for that very reason. I'm going to just relax into life now and enjoy the ride while exploring more spell use as it's always fun transforming things around me instead of physically trying hard with silly logic. I've been attached to the physicalist paradigm for a long time, it's funny how it's clearly nonphysical from the first awakening and then we continue to treat it as physical day by day. There is no need for growth to toy around this dreamstate yet we keep thinking of it as that way, it's merely just being and expanding in it. Insights will always be infinite, even infinite holding on to the very ones you already on as you expand or are in your temporary phases as i see them, yet i'm like why should i bother letting the others of me know? it's just me anyway it's fine. It's all good. When the time comes for every othering it comes, if not it's fine too. Eventually we all reap what we sow, I'm glad i dropped some good quality although i'm aware that it's all neutral either way of quality or not. I still have a lot of gratitude in my heart for this place for it is the place that started it all. Even though it has no location

Edited March 16, 2018 by khalifa

[Rookie]

Man this entry was inspiring as fuck! 

Keep on growing my friend! Hopefully someday I can reach your level of attainment. 

[moon777light]

wow. thats all i can say!  

[khalifa]

A few days ago randomly saw some videos of leo skipping around them. I had no interest in the content as I feel and know I am beyond it all.

Decided to visit an old place, Lurk'd the forums read a few posts and discussions here and there, laughed at the silly bickering going around knowing it'll never end.

 

It seems my interests and understanding have changed drastically, I no longer feel like a beggar for help. I no longer feel the need to manage or improve of anything that i am, I used to seek those external sources. I now just feel so put off them.

I'm aware they aren't wrong for them being there, whether optimal for some and far away from being helpful for some, they are still part of me and are paved roads for some.

 

As for me I just have my inner being with me at all times and I enjoy joyfully manifesting whatever I seek from my day to day experience, I've stopped attending university completely, Stopped working. I let go completely, I no longer experience the fear factor that was in the way of tasting the true joys of life. I've reaped health and wealth. I just enjoy them as I've seem to put a clock of how much time I'll be spending in this body as there will be a plateau of what can be experienced, This is where i will seek more in my next form. I actually already feel immortal If i wanted i can extend this physical apparatus time span, but i see no need to as I'm more excited on the next phases coming. Yet I'm always present in the now as it's always perfect at every moment.