Girzo's AL-LAD Trip Reports Compilation

[Girzo]

These are my experiences with AL-LAD. Maybe someone will find it interesting to read or can give a feedback. Every opinion is much appreciated.

First Ever 75mcg AL-LAD Trip

• I have taken half a tab of AL-LAD, feels good.
• I have grasped that ordinary is extraordinary and extraordinary is ordinary.
• I have partially grasped that God hides behind the Devil's mask.
• I was walking through the forest.

AL-LAD boosts the contemplation process and reconnects you with your body nicely. This trip had hit me with body load the strongest of them all. My heart was aching for whole two days, I didn't experience it again on higher doses. What I can notice now after few more trips is that I like to go on walks after these. It's a recurring theme.

 

Trip Report - AL-LAD, 225mcg

I am not sure what to write here. I am so blown off, but not spiritualy, but like a normal human being. The best experience of my life for sure, but I haven't experienced much yet.

SET&SETTING: 1.5 blotter AL-LAD (225mcg, probably less), home alone, music for a good start (Infected Mushroom ).

Music gave me a structure to hold on and a sense of clarity.

What came up first in my mind, and what I hold as a key insight of this trip, is that there are appearances and actual experiences. It's not the advertisement that's important, but the actual thing. Your imaginary vision of sex is nothing like a real thing at all. Same goes for psychedelics, you can't really know what it is until you try it. Everything flashes in your face and makes promises, but not everything delivers. Cut the shit that doesn't work, test new promising shit, optimze, repeat until you are no longer here.

I have discovered a lot of femininity inside during this trip. I am not sure if it was, because I lack attention from girls in my everyday experience or because I am constantly repressing my feminine side. Probably both. Anyways, I have received a lot of love from cute pop-art girls. I was repeating to myself over and over again not to get lost in the beauty of it. Mushy, kushy, blushy, pooh pooh. Pure pleasure.

I went down. Down to my private hell. I was scared at first, but decided to enter anyways. It was dissapointing. No fire, no devils. Everything was covered with ice. It couldn't be that way. Instantly, I have ignited everything, summoned devils, gave life to this place. Let there be a hell, so there can be a heaven. Everything can have a thousand of faces, just like the Devil, so don't trust appearances, see things for what they really are. See yourself for what you really are. I resonate with the idea of devilry and the Devil, but it's my caricatured, cartoon-like spin on it. Sometimes the bad side turns out to be a good one.

I have experienced mild shift in perception and got how it feels. I was laughing at my self looking serious at me. Then I became a serious one and were looking at the laughing one. Back and forth. And simultaneously. Nothing really changes, but everything is different.

I am actually amazed by visual part of the trip. It's nothing like what I have expected. It has this 80's vibe to it, very colorful with taste, not like all those psychedelics renders on the web. Smooth gradients, no contours, simple shapes. Sometimes vibrant, sometimes bland. Very clean and geometric, symmetric patterns. I came to conclusion that nothing is really symmetric, the mirror becomes the picture itself. All symmetry is groundless.

Writing it all down feels stupid, but I decided to do it anyway. What I can articulate compared to the depth of thoughts I had is ridiculous. And I feel like it wasn't even that deep. Either it doesn't make sense to talk about these things or I need to work on my ability to conceptualize stuff.

 

Trip Report - AL-LAD, 150mcg

SET&SETTING: 

After school (15:30), knowing the next day lessons are at 8:00, one tab of AL-LAD (150mcg, untested) was ingested. Parents magically disappeared to do the shopping until 19:45. Empty stomach, one banana eaten during the trip, zero nausea. Eating fatty food and donout at the end of the trip resulted in feeling "tired" in the stomach.

ACTUAL TRIP: 

Started off with music, then dropped it. Without it a lot of dreamy thoughts have appeared. These were resisted and trying to contemplate the substance of reality was choosen, although it didn't go smooth. The main conclusion is that there is no perciever and no perception, because there's no perciever, because there's no perception.

Some emotional baggage realted to male-female relationships was brought up and mainly ignored. Advice was given to actually understand the situation. Mechanism behind the scenes did exactly what it was supposed to do. Actually appreciate experiences given and enjoy the possibility to grow. All the pain is created in the mind and the story of being hurt reinforces the ego.

What was given during this trip is an ability to see reality as non-existent during self-inquiry.

During this trip there were moments when I was a higher intelligence teaching the ego how it should behave, giving myself insights. It reminds me of a psychological concept of superego, ego and id. It feels like you are this Elder being.

It was choosen not to assume existence of any entities, including myself, so there haven't been any creatures met during this experience.

SIDE NOTES:

Insights from the trip get clearer with every day and somtimes drastically change contradicting the previous thoughts. It's like they are maturing by themselves.

Next trip needs better preparation. In every possible way. It would be better if there was more self-inquiry done prior to the experience. Also less social contact and even less external stimuli. There should be no fear of someone interrupting and no fear of losing mind.

150mcg seems somewhat over-the-top for a party setting, extrapolating from this experience, sticking with a little bit less will probably result in cleaner experience. At the same time effects may get killed with reasoning. It needs to be tested, but it's always better to test with lower dosage.

I get curious about the correlation between realms of experience and Truth. I assume they are a distraction when it comes to pursuing Enlightement, but it's amazing what's possibly possible. Whole reality feels magical for the first time in my life.

Effects on the body were moderate, but they are still there in a mild form three days later. Whole body feels different, but still tensed. "Feeling compact" describes it very accurately. There wasn't any energy release throughout the trip.

 

Trip Report - AL-LAD, 300mcg

SET&SETTING: 

It was Friday night, 20:30. Drunk people on the lower floor. I was alone in my room. Two tabs ingested spontaneously as an impulse. Swallowed without putting them under a tongue - took a little bit longer to hit, but not too long. I have said to dad that I have been drinking and can't drive today. It didn't matter, because dad was so drunk he was getting stuck in the loop and non-stop forgetting about everything. I have prepared banana and a cup of water.

ACTUAL TRIP: 

I have planned to watch Leo's video about strange loops. I have started before ingestion of drug and finished during the trip, as it was getting late. I didn't go as deep into the topic as when I was sober. Psychedlic effects has hit during watching and I started to see blue light around character on the screen. I was watching the show on the phone with headphones. It felt different than when watching it for the first time.

The biggest problem with this trip is that I don't remember the juicy parts. I have this feeling like a lot of cool stuff has happened, but I can't recall them, it's all so foggy. I will try to write up what I remember.

Listening to Tycho - Awake, I was trying to contemplate. I had to have music on, because people in the house were too noisy. I have to say it's a great album, visuals it has inspired were off the Earth. Music felt physical, like it had 3D structure, a whole new universe hidden in a song, it was a pure beauty. I was thinking about strange loops and then weird thing happened...

I don't remember the next hour. It's not like I have passed out or something. I was still listening to music and something like melting has happened. I totally forgot about contemplation. From my playlist's history I know I was listening to Glitch Mob's Drink The Sea album. It wasn't profound or anything, I can't recall any thought or feeling other than immense pleasure.

When I have snaped out of it a lot of interesting stuff started to happen. I was conscious enough to turn music off. My sense of self was being ripped in waves. My body was taken away. I was experiencing lives of other beings, like an absolute empathy. I was some girl, some guy, it felt like I really had their bodies, their personalities. It was switching, no-self, some created self, my ego back, some created self, reality at this moment felt really big, but not infinite. Everything was just spacious. There were no walls, just body floating in some kind of energy field, full of fractals.

Someone on the lower floor started arguing, I have heard that and got confused. My everyday ego partially crept back in for a moment to disperse the next second. Now I have become people arguing, was living their perspectives and their emotions. I had total understanding of emotions and mechanism rulling their interactions. At the same time, I couldn't care less about them, I was so understanding that I didn't care about what they do or say at all.

Eating banana was an ecstasy. I ate only one bite to avoid stomach-ache.

I thought my cup of water is empty. With smile on my face, I took it into both of my hands, put them into the air and asked for a miracle to happen, because I didn't want to go and refill it. I tried to take a sip from it and almost drenched myself, because it turns out it wasn't empty. It was funny as fuck moment.

I have tried to do the pen exercise. You take a pen and try to see that it doesn't exsist, you can then see that nothing exists. It went different way than when I had tried it before. When I look at this pen now, after the trip, I feel intense presence taking over me. This task is easier on one tab.

After that I said fuck it all, I am gonna have fun. I have listened to Scooter and Robbie Williams, because for weird reason they feel like evil twin brothers for me and it makes me laugh. Paradoxically it was a very deep and uplifting experience. I had thought a lot about human nature.

Then Modjo - Lady started playing on autoplay. I went deep into this nostalgia trip, emotions were overtaking as I was watching a music video on YouTube.

Later I was sitting on my coach, shifting between different states of consciousness. I realized that every undesired or bad thing in my life is there, because I want it on a deeper level, I can't say no to experiencing it from pure curiosity. 

I am sitting there as this Supervisor, owner of my own reality, it's my favourite element of every trip. Being this wise, totally confident person, that nails bullshit as soon as it appears, very grounded in reality. I thought I would like to feel like this all the time and then it struck me that I can. That psychedelic states of consciousness can be felt 24/7, they are not reserved to any substance, you just need to work your ass off and can attain whatever you desire. 

I have finished off with a walk on the fresh air. For some weird reason I was thinking about alien abduction, but quickly dropped this notion. Starry night sky is one of the most beautiful thing I have seen in my entire life. Everything I saw had this ancient egypt vibe to it. I was like a pharraoh or an ancient priest walking through the night on the desert. Very hard to put it into words. Mind was empty of thoughts almost all the time. Every street lamp has looked like an entire pizza-like shaped universe. I have returned home calmer than ever.

SIDE NOTES:

Overall I am not satisfied with this trip. It has showed me that many things are possible to change in my life, that it doesn't have to be the way it is right now. It was a lot of fun and serious at the time, but I feel like I have wasted the substance, It has a lot more potential and can be used in a much more profound way.

I have liked the previous 150mcg trip much more, it was concise and harmonic. This one is pure chaos, a monkey-mind on a trip to the amusement park. Even this report is chaotic. I can't imagine how people are taking doses as high as 600mcg of this substance and manage to take something out from it. For me 300mcg is more than enough, I will probably stick to 225mcg dose in my next trips. It seems like a sweet-spot. But I haven't tripped enough to be sure.

There are interesting after effects of this trip. For example, when driving a car I have moments of totally dissolving and merging with the car, it's such a cool feeling. I am still me, but everything happens so smoothly and effortlessly, perfect gear shifting, a lot more things get noticed, it last for few minutes.

Another after effect is this being Supervisor feeling. I feel like I own reality and I am much more aware of many things, like for example posture or thought patterns. Clearness of mind is connected to this feeling. When mind clears I start to feel more grounded and everything happens effortlessly. It doesn't last long, but I would like to have it 24/7.

I went on a walk one day and was just amazed with how magical everything feels. Everything was alive, I was contemplating nature and looking with awe at beauty of it. Funny thing with my contemplation is it sometimes goes into off-words-mode. It happens on another level, I catch myself that these words are no longer useful when contemplating such and such matter and start doing a thing that I can't fully describe, but surely something clicks in the mind during that process.

Another after effect is disliking of certain foods, mainly fast-foods. I can eat bananas, apples and nuts all day. But eating salty sticks, it just felt terrible on the next day. I have automatically put some in my mouth without too much thinking and I thought I will spit them out. They have tasted like raw wheat and were almost impossible to chew. Pasta with meat - was terrible. Brussels = awesome. Burger from McDonald's was possible to eat, but not as tasty as always. I was farting and burping all the time. I should watch much better what I put into my mouth, after next trip. This time I was just curious how terrible something can taste.

And I have found it. The most terrible, untasty thing in the world. Lech's brand alcohol-free beer. I was on Orgonite's concert the next day after the trip and got thirsty. Considering that water in the club costs the same as a beer, I went for the beer. Usually I like it, but this time it felt terrible. Like I was drinking bleach. Dying would be more pleasant than drinking this beer. I have forced myself to sip enough to satiate thirst and got rid of it.

Few days after I also feel mild effects on my body. I became touchy. I like touching stuff. My face feels pleasant, it's delighting to smile. I like touching my hands, holding hands and hugging others. Usually it's not my cup of tea, but now it's extra satisfying. Music also sounds different, much deeper, I haven't heard it like that ever before.

 

=== CONCLUSION ===

I have lost my "apetite" for this substance, I feel like I should focus on improving my self-inquiry habit and then go back to it. I think those drugs should be approached in a more retreat-like conditions, with even cleaner diet, less distraction, alone and prepared. Now it feels like I am wasting material and time. I don't say it doesn't change me, it does, and quite radically to be honest, but I don't want to rely on the substance so much, that it's the only self-improvment habit that I do consistently, because that sounds like developing an addiction. I hope you have had a nice read, even though the text is kind of messy.

[OBEler]

Thanks for your report, especially for your preparation tips.  Is it needed to buy a test kit for Al-lad if you buy from a famous RC-Shop which exist for a long time?

[Girzo]

@brovakhiin Yup, I am looking forward for my first trip on 4-HO-MiPT. It's the only legal alternative to shrooms available in my country. Already bought a scale for weighting these psychedelicacies. 

@OBEler Preparation tips? I always clean my house and room before every trip, too. I prepare all props like pen and blanket, put usefull things in accessible places, etc.

Every RC shop can make a mistake. I wouldn't worry about one or two tabs with name of the substance written on it, as it's probably it, but I would never take high dose of something untested, because if it turns out to be DOx or NBOME you can be in a serious trouble. Even if shop owners have good intentions they could have been scammed and sell mislabeled stuff. Also, not every batch is equal, sometimes there are impurities, so even if you have tested the substance, you should start low, because the test won't show you quality, only the type of substance.

There are enough amputation trip reports on the internet. Like this one where guy binged on 130mg of DOC total and lost his fingers. It's highly stupid dose for DOC, but not that unreal for other less potent drugs that also come in powder.

I know testing is a pain in the ass and at first I was hesitating to buy reagents, because AL-LAD and other lysergamides are fairly safe, but it's worth to have them at the house. Or maybe the other way around, the risk is not worth it. There are easy to use 3x or 5x kits that are prepared exactly for testing lsd-class substances, sou don't have to buy a lot of bottles of reagents at once.

[Lauritz]

On 11.12.2017 at 10:11 PM, Girzo said:

For example, when driving a car I have moments of totally dissolving and merging with the car, it's such a cool feeling

Are you serious?  

Please do not do that again... On psychedelics you can never be sure when a trance will hit you. Intensity can vary from one second to another. And you don't want to drive a car while you drop into some of those deeper states.

That is exactly why psychedelics get a bad reputation. People using them irresponsibly....

 

I enjoyed the rest of your report though and agree with your conclusion.

I have spend four years developing understanding and the right habits since my last real trip. Now I feel it is time to explore it again.

Edited December 13, 2017 by Lauritz

[Girzo]

On 11 grudnia 2017 at 10:11 PM, Girzo said:

There are interesting after effects of this trip. For example, when driving a car...

@Lauritz when I say after effects I mean for example as far as two days after the trip, as in this example. Don't take it too literary, I describe a state of consciousness here.  Do you want to prohibit Enlightened people from driving? They might experience something similar.

Have you ever ridden a motorcycle? Some people report similar experiences of merging with the machine when ridding a bike. And now I totally get what they mean and why driving is so addictive for some people. If I could feel non-stop like that when driving, I would drive 24/7.

[Joseph Maynor]

How would you compare this substance to an LSD high?  I don't have experience with AL-LAD yet.  It seems like you went way into your shadow.  Have you been doing some shadow-work?  I get the sense that the Ego is cracking in you and is gonna blow into the Shadow and then do the whole re-integration process that a lot of people call the Dark Night of the Soul.  That's what happened to me anyway.  That was my first major Enlightenment-Shift.  The Ego and the Shadow have to re-unite, which is one of the major shifts on this path.  If you really start acting from your Shadow, that's a sign you are in this stage.  Your personality will almost flip to the opposite for a while.  And then the Dark Night will follow once you realize that the Ego never was you.  This is all very healthy stuff, all growth.  Let it play itself out.

Watch:

EXERCISE TO EXAMINE ROLES:

1.  What is the role that I am/was playing?  Describe the role.

2.  What are the specific ways that I act/acted out this role?

3.  When did I adopt this role?  (Can I pinpoint the moment when I started to adopt this role?)

4.  What was life like before I started acting this role?

5.  How did I acquire this role?

6.  What traumatic event(s), if any, created the need for this role?

7.  Why do/did I need this role?  What function did/does this role serve in my life?

8.  What deep psychological need did/does playing out this role satisfy?  How was/is this role protecting me?

9.  How artificial and contrived was/is this role?

10.  Which genuine aspect of me was/is this role suppressing?

Edited December 14, 2017 by Joseph Maynor

[Lauritz]

@Girzo haha sorry. I was thinking you were driving while tripping. No two days later should be more than alright.

And I know the feeling you mentioned. To the point that it can feel weird getting of the motorcycle. Like having to readjust once senses and behavior.