Almost Done With University Major. Hating It, Afraid To Quit

[Franz]

Hello there, lets try to keep this short. (edit: lol didnt work)

Iam 27, almost done with my degree as a mechanical engineer, everything seems to run fine from the outside,

But iam about to quit. To throw away that opportunity that I worked on for the last 3 years.

The reason is: There is NO passion left whatsoever. Everything about this program moved on from beeing 

a challenge to plain torture (more of a unknown challenge. I started because of the recommendations of close friends and people I trust,

and also kept going because of their support. Big mistake.).

 

Because of my so-so passion for this whole field right from the start, my results have always been very, very mediocre.

And thats actually my biggest problem. I want to do something that makes me proud of myself, something that I would not be afraid to

show around. I wish I would have failed hard, right in my first year, and would have called it a day, moved on. But i was always "good enough" to 

stay where I am. I was, and Iam, pretty comfortable. People around me are super supportive to me doing this, I made lots of friends and 

money due to beeing this student that I dont want to be. My misery grew, I detached more and more from what i was doing.

This does not only involve the University major, but also the kind of job i will most likely get. 

I cant imagine myself living like this, other than for the sake of money and a healthy social network.

 

I want to break free. This would involve re-organizing everything I was telling myself and others over the years,

admitting to mistakes, likely loose some friends and the respect of people around me (maybe thats just my delusion?),

but most importantly, find a REAL PURPOSE for myself. Iam lacking a vision thats true to myself after those years of self-denial

and lies. But Iam afraid.

My plan is to let go, and finally, do Leos life purpose course with all of my heart. Because right now, I dont see anything

of true value I might be able to give to the world, other than going with the flow around me. That needs to change.

 

Thanks for reading this. Do you have similar experiences? Any Tips? Am I making a big mistake here? 

 

As always, english is not my first Language, sorry for any mistakes.

[Pallero]

This is very interesting because I had a similar experience a year ago. I was almost finished with my major, hated it and wanted to quit. I called a University counsellor on the phone, and she made me realize that I wanted to quit, because I was scared of life after graduation (you seem to be scared of it too?).

So I quit my job and gave my undivided attention to finishing and graduating. After graduation I experienced major relief and went on to pursue my life-long dream with clear conscience.

Some people told me to quit right away, but that path would have made me feel really bad about myself. Now I have a degree and while I used to think that it was useless, I have come to change my mind. As I pursue my dream, I realize that my first degree will come in handy later on in life.

Just something for you to think about.

[Franz]

Thank you for your replies guys, I really appreciate it. 

 

1 hour ago, Pallero said:

This is very interesting because I had a similar experience a year ago. I was almost finished with my major, hated it and wanted to quit. I called a University counsellor on the phone, and she made me realize that I wanted to quit, because I was scared of life after graduation (you seem to be scared of it too?).

So I quit my job and gave my undivided attention to finishing and graduating. After graduation I experienced major relief and went on to pursue my life-long dream with clear conscience.

Some people told me to quit right away, but that path would have made me feel really bad about myself. Now I have a degree and while I used to think that it was useless, I have come to change my mind. As I pursue my dream, I realize that my first degree will come in handy later on in life.

Just something for you to think about.

This train of thought also crossed my mind, and I will talk to my professor,counsellor and my boss at the university job before making the decision. Its hard to clear my mind about this, and I dont want to make another snap decision that will end in misery. 

Also, just writing this down here really helps. 

[FindingPeace]

I can relate to this.

I quit an engineering degree after 3 years for the very same reason. My heart wasn't in it, and I was only mediocre in my ability and results. I wasn't doing it for me. I couldn't see myself actually doing it for a living and basing my future on it.

I walked away from it and and I don't ever regret that. Ok, so I haven't had huge amounts of 'success' since but even if I had completed the degree I wouldn't have labled it a success as I wouldn't have wanted to use that qualifiaction for anything. If I had gone in to engineering I wouldn't have enjoyed it. It wasn't my passion.

It was one of the most liberating feelings walking away from it - actually making a choice and taking responsibility for myself rather than following other people's expectations.

Many people will probably dogmatically preach to you how you should stick with it and complete it. But what do they know? They aren't you. There is no shame or failure in changing your path. In fact making such a big change, taking a big step out from what you are doing shows more guts and determination.

If you leave, it will give you the freedom to pursue some real passion in your life. I have tried and failed to pursue other passions but if you don't try for them you will never know where they may take you. But what you do know right now is that sticking with the path you're on right now isn't going to fulfill you. You could try and stick to your current path and years down the line come back to the same conclusion, or you can use the time you have now, wisely and pursue something else.

Either way, it's your choice and noone can/should judge you on it. You have to do what is best for you.

[bernieboy20]

I'm pretty much in the exact same position as you right now, except im in my second year. I'm currently researching what I can do instead if I do drop out of uni this year.

I would suggest this exercise: Draw out 3 columns on a page, 1 titled "what I'm afraid of" and list everything that scares you about making this decision, in the next column list all the consequences in your life that could occur because of this and in the final one write what you could do to get back to normal if it did go wrong. You'll probably see that even if things do go wrong the consequences aren't that catastrophic. 

Please keep me updated about your decision

[Ray]

I changed twice university and now I'm maybe changing it another time... you can immagine all the struggles etc... this is just for telling you that there are other people out there that are facing your same problems... So yeah, face it, you can do it bro! from the power of your expression, your sincerity we can see that you have a deep desire, so I believe in this! I wish you the best and good luck  

[Leo Gura]

Make sure you don't get sucked back into the day-to-day grind. Use this time to change course in your life, or you will regret it latter.

The life purpose course will serve you well. It was designed such for these kinds of situations.

And I quit mechanical engineering myself in college. It's terribly dry.

Muster the courage to follow your passion.

[David1]

Almost done? Like in June?  If it's just these three months...i'd say try to pass anyway, even if you're not interested in pusuing a career in the field. If you ever want to study something else, you might get some exemptions...

Edited April 8, 2016 by David1

[Franz]

Hi Guys and Thanks alot for your suggestions and comments. It feels like I wrote the last post a year ago or something.

 

I did what was already decided in my mind for a long time. I let go and went with my inner voice, my gut feeling, the will of the universe or whatever you may wish to call it.

Iam going to be a teacher. 

You wont believe how relieved Iam. Like a mountain beeing lifted from my shoulders. Everything went great so far, I gathered everything I know about myself, everything I can already do better than others, everything that may be resourceful to them. Since i am quite above average in english (native german speaker. Also did a test on this recently, very good results) and love to help others (more than myself! Its something I cant change), and like to work with kids, I came up with this english  teacher vision. I also want to include personal development/practical advise as a topic, i still need to do research on this. What a challenge, since this topic is not covered in modern schooling systems. There is a class called "ethics/religion" here in germany, maybe that will do.

Everyone I talked to was surprised by my decision and enthusiasm. My boss that i work for at the university gave me his full support, called my decision manly and honest while sharing some of his own struggles in life. I expected him to rip me into pieces! Fire my ass instantly!

 

I keep working on this. I can see a future for myself, finally. And I can sleep well again.

Edited April 13, 2016 by Franz

[charlie2dogs]

On 4/8/2016 at 7:11 PM, Leo Gura said:

Make sure you don't get sucked back into the day-to-day grind. Use this time to change course in your life, or you will regret it latter.

The life purpose course will serve you well. It was designed such for these kinds of situations.

And I quit mechanical engineering myself in college. It's terribly dry.

Muster the courage to follow your passion.

great advice Leo, living without passion in what you do is a miserable situation.

[Franz]

Cool to find my old Thread. Lots of Things changed during the last couple of months, inside and out. 

Thanks for your advice guys, it really helped me to make a decision. Life-changing stuff.

Iam living ten times more passionate now, studying topics that i love, with great new relationships. Sometimes, iam moved

to tears. I also did not run away from work or problems, actually, iam busy as nuts right now. But it all feels much more effortless.