My Life Situation, Any Thoughts?

[Viking]

I am currently taking the life purpose course, I am just at the start of it.

It is required by law to join the army in my country for 3 years, therefore I went ahead and joined a program that pays almost fully for my 3 year degree in physics with about 2k$ per year for personal spendings (using them I bought the course). after the degree I am required to serve 6 years instead of 3, but in a position related to physics and a more leadership type. I have currently started my 2nd year of the degree.

Before university, I really liked physics concepts and aspired to be someone like Elon Musk, as cliche as it sounds. As I started my degree I did pretty well, physics and math come pretty natural to me but the only stuff that really interested me was higher level stuff so I slacked off and my grades were average. After that came a little bit of wisdom and I started to understand the importance of basic level stuff and that started to interest me too. Overall, I found physics and math interesting but my motivation to study was halfassed because I didnt have my life purpose properly set up. That was my situation about the end of the second semester, after that, was the summer break.

Just a little before the summer break I discovered enlightenment through Leo (I have been watching him for about a year here and there) and there I started to meditate and watch a ton of videos of his and it continued to the summer break.

Slowly my realization came to me that what i've been doing until that point was ALL ego. I wanted to be the next tesla, elon musk, einstein, whatever, to invent something new that would make my life great and i'd be famous. I realized that this is not what would make me happy and so my Illusion of an apparent life purpose that I had went away. that "weak" vision is nonexistent within me anymore and I see now that probably my vision wont have anything to do with technological advancement because that's not what the human race needs. (I am not 100% sure about that)

When I was in that belief that being an inventor would make me happy I thought that the 6 years doing physics after the degree would be extremely beneficial, all the leadership skills I would learn that would later make me a great entrepreneur, but now where im starting from ground zero searching for my life purpose using Leo's course It may or may not be a waste of 8 upcoming years of my life (6+2 i have left for the degree). I may discover my life purpose and this stuff would be 180 degrees from it.

I understand that physics is a great subject that teaches you how to think and it would be beneficial in any career path, especially when I already gone half the road already, but the 6 years afterwards that may not be connected to anything scare me a bit.

Now im contemplating whether I should quit the program, I would have to repay all the money they gave me so far through the army salary and give up a laptop they gave me, and also my parents have very high hopes for me and they would be extremely against.

In case I decide not to quit, which is probably what will happen, I wonder how to keep my motivation for my studies, because they are interesting, but no connection to life purpose is apparent for now. I feel whenever I sit to study my time is wasted, i feel like watching a tv show or watching the life purpose course or reading about spirituality is more productive. help me to convince myself otherwise.

Thanks.

[elias]

do what you  love

[Viking]

@elias that would mean for me being in debt, making my parents angry at me and going to jail for abstaining from service.

[Pelin]

Devoting your life to your life purpose sounds great; however, it seems that quitting now for you is not a great option. After all, you can't really pursue your life purpose when you're rock bottom considering Maslow's hierarchy of needs. I would go about pursuing physics and finishing military service if that's the best thing to cover your basic needs right now. 

I believe life purpose is not about your self really, it's about how to serve the world we are living in in a better way. So, to me, wherever you are, whatever job you hold, you can pursue your life purpose. Even when you're doing your military service, you can change the lives of people you are leading. You can change minds and be a positive influence and still be an inventor. But your motivation probably won't be becoming the next Musk and get rich and stuff, you'll find your way on how to serve the planet as you get more conscious.

When I went to Japan last year, I visited a Zen temple very early in the morning. All the monks were out in their plain white clothes, cleaning the temple and designing the sand garden, every day, time and again. If you asked them, they would probably say this wasn't what they signed up for. But because they carry on the worldly tasks so diligently, they are able to focus on the inner work more strongly. 

Don't forget the hierarchy of needs. You need at least financial freedom from your parents to actualize yourself. If the only choice seems to be the army, then my suggestion is doing it mindfully.

Don't care about making parents angry (of course you need to take responsibility of your financial situation). Don't make plans based on your parents' vision of you, that always backfired on me and everyone I've seen.

[elias]

than it´s perhaps wiser to do first what you "have to do" and then what you love

[Viking]

@Pelin wow, thank you, you really helped. I didnt consider Maslow's hierarchy of needs. you also brought the insight that I can practice my life purpose anywhere, it's another perspective to look through.

The problem now I guess is how do I have motivation to study, since it wont be the thing I will do my whole life.

[Pelin]

@Ilya You're very welcome.

Every little thing you learn will open up new opportunities for you, and will bring you one step closer to your big purpose. Everything is connected, and your education is a great base for whatever you want to do in life. You're actually quite lucky that you're good at physics and maths. I am an English teacher but I wish I understood physics, I'm sure it would be a gamechanger for how I see the world. 

[beastmode]

@Pelin @elias of course you need to be practical, but I think Leo's course teaches to Follow Your Bliss. Maybe you'll run in to some initial troubles, but you will find your object of mastery sooner, nail out your 10,000 hours sooner, and thereby unlock all the security/comfort/independence needs. So my advice would be to follow your heart first and worry about the independence etc later. 

[George Fil]

On 11/4/2017 at 5:25 PM, Pelin said:

Don't forget the hierarchy of needs. You need at least financial freedom from your parents to actualize yourself. If the only choice seems to be the army, then my suggestion is doing it mindfully.

@Pelin @Ilya So true. Hierarchy of needs is crucial. This goes to the people who say money doesn't matter at all. 

I myself tried in the past to be independent working on things it was not my best, but i had to do it back then to be independent now, and it was one of the biggest step to self actualization. I did not lie to myself that i liked all that, i just worked while knowing this is something temporary.

Edited November 6, 2017 by George Fil