Ayla

Do You Want to Be Right, or Do You Want to Be Happy?

5 posts in this topic

This is a very delicate topic I struggled with all my life. 

I thought my opinions were so valid, so strong, so in point! I would never let any (or almost any) external point of view penetrate the wall of my own righteousness. Mercifully, thankfully, that was one of the first illusions that dropped off me once I stepped into the Light. 

I still see it a lot, especially in spiritual/religious people. People do not take the time to REALLY question something that comes into their experience. Most, just tell the other part bluntly: you are wrong and I am right! (more or less veiled) 

People hold on so tightly to their beliefs, even tho the results of those beliefs are highly questionable. 

As an example, I have a friend who has been on a "spiritual path" for decades, but still, her life is a mess, she is stuck in the same paradigm and no real change is there despite hundreds of courses and practices she has tackled. 

I know you talked a lot about limiting beliefs and being open, but ... maybe put like this, it will put it all together in an even more practical perspective? 


Ayla,

www.aylabyingrid.com

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57 minutes ago, Ayla said:

This is a very delicate topic I struggled with all my life. 

I thought my opinions were so valid, so strong, so in point! I would never let any (or almost any) external point of view penetrate the wall of my own righteousness. Mercifully, thankfully, that was one of the first illusions that dropped off me once I stepped into the Light. 

I still see it a lot, especially in spiritual/religious people. People do not take the time to REALLY question something that comes into their experience. Most, just tell the other part bluntly: you are wrong and I am right! (more or less veiled) 

People hold on so tightly to their beliefs, even tho the results of those beliefs are highly questionable. 

As an example, I have a friend who has been on a "spiritual path" for decades, but still, her life is a mess, she is stuck in the same paradigm and no real change is there despite hundreds of courses and practices she has tackled. 

I know you talked a lot about limiting beliefs and being open, but ... maybe put like this, it will put it all together in an even more practical perspective? 

I feel like the key (for me at least) to being able to tackle many concepts is keeping an open mind, I really don't attach myself to many beliefs. For me, being "right" has nothing to do with awareness and everything to do with ego.

Once aware of this, I felt so humbled at how much I really don't know and then gratitude for the opportunity to learn more. In my opinion becoming defensive over a certain belief is a sign of low counsciousness. 

I also have a friend who seems to be on a similar "spiritual" path. Her life is constant coas. I just remind myself that she is exactly where she needs to be on her journey and then reflect back to see where I might be holding onto a belief too tightly. It always leads to gratitude which feels "right" to me. 

 

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Yes, I know.

What helped me at one point, was intense and merciless questioning when in one of this frames of mind: 

  1. "I always did [fill in the blank]"
  2. "I strongly believe [fill in the blank]"

Every time that comes up (now less and less), I KNOW for sure I'm delusional :D 

This has so many ramifications tho... people take for granted so many things: especially from leaders or people they trust/admire, deep inner contradictions... which are so easy to point out from outside, but they refuse these pointings because they are more comfortable being right, attached to what they always did (and never worked for them LOL). 

Anyway, I just thought this would be yet another cool subject for a video which Leo can help people with.. 

 


Ayla,

www.aylabyingrid.com

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Since we know nothing we are not right at anything, or at least no one can know. I don't even know if I am right with this statement. I want to be happy...or rather fullfilled. Being right, living in your own dogma is a huge trap. I don't think you can win this battle :D

I personally try to let go of everything I believe I know to be right and I constantly remind myself to keep an open mind. Still, I do not accept every bullshit that people throw at me and I often stick to things or beliefs that I am comfortable with or which work for me, until I maybe be ready for new beliefs. Maybe they are not ultimately right, but they are what seems to work for me right in the moment, and as long I have not found anything that works even better, I stick to them.

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I think this is an excellent topic and I hope Leo makes a video. I've noticed with my current studying right now, that to be in a place of "not knowing" is important. Like not knowing whether my belief is actually correct, for one thing. (Reminds me of Leo's discussion in his recent video on "knowledge"). so it sounds like being in a place of not knowing would lead to less needing to defend a belief, and less needing to be "right" and I imagine one would be happier if not so attached to winning an argument or disagreement.

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