Why People Seem Crazy Summary

[Juan Cruz Giusto]

“Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.” Margaret Mead

There are two basic models you can use to think about people:

1-      People are all the same (The Sameness Model)

2-      People are all different (The Different Model)

Most people hold the first model. Sadly, this creates problems for themselves. From this model, we look at people like they are wired like us and this is a false assumption.

The Sameness Model

It says “I’m a person. Here is like reality seems to me. Here is like happiness and sadness feels to me. Here is what angers feels like. And everyone must be the same way since we are all human beings.” All other people is wired as I am.

Another assumption about the sameness model is that all people live in the same physical reality.

So, this model thinks that if people are wired the same as I am and don’t act or behave the same way as me, it means that there is something wrong with other people and they are misbehaving. You are using yourself as the measure to compare others. When others misbehave regarding your standard, you call them crazy, lazy, criminals or even animals.

The negative consequences of having this model is that it leads to a fundamental misunderstanding of people. It puts us in an adversarial relationship with foreigners (people who don’t behave like you). It also creates criticizing, debating, violence, frustration, judging and so on.

The Difference Model

In reality, people have different models of reality and the world! Recognize that each individual is genetically unique. People have different motivations, desires, abilities, fears, aspirations, levels of self-discipline and pain tolerance, emotions, moods, brain chemistry, spiritual entuned and so forth.

People actually occupies different realities than you. Each one of us live in our own bubble and the intersections between them is what we call physical reality.

What is the evidence for this? Researchers discovered that there are 5 aspects of human personality:

·         Extroversion

·         Agreeableness

·         Conscientiousness

·         Self-Efficacy

·         Neuroticism

·         Openness

These personality aspects see and experience the world very different since your emotions filter and shape what you feel. You construct your reality since it’s mostly conceptual.

Understand that there is no good or bad personality traits. The problem comes when we try to make people like us, without appreciating that we are different and that there are only different outlooks of reality.

Each personality trait is good for different purposes and many of them are just programmed from childhood or just different biologies. Sexual orientations, drug addictions, sex addiction, criminals and so forth are programmed to do it for different causes; you need much more compassion. WE ARE WIRED DIFFERENTLY, THEREFORE WE ACT IN DIFFERENT WAYS!

Why people experience spirituality differently?

People experience spirituality and psychedelics differently because of our brain structure and chemical soups. There are hundreds of traditions and different aspects of spirituality.

This also explains why some people are interested in spirituality and enlightenment and some people aren’t. Why should they be?

Psychedelics will show you that there are a lot of ways that consciousness can be but they are not useful for survival or reproduction.

Traps and Misunderstandings

1-      All of my behavior is justified? If you are acting unconsciously, you are going to regret it yourself. People tend to behave the way they were programmed. Just behave in a caring and compassionate way.

2-      My dreams are impossible? Don’t turn this into a reason not to grow. Many of your problems are just limiting beliefs.

Just accept reality as it is! Then, what you do about it is up to you. As a community, we decide what we want and develop systems to foster that. Instead of condemning people, just be compassionate and act accordingly.

Tips

1-      Discover what your authentic self is and be it unapologetically. Discover your strengths and exploit them

2-      Let people be themselves and appreciate the differences

3-      Be open to radical new lifestyles and worldviews

4-      Realize that you don’t know what is it like to be another person

5-      Don’t condemn people. They might be victims of their circumstances.

6-      Think twice when giving advice to people; you usually don’t see their point of view

7-      Seek alternative worldviews

8-      Be careful who you role model. You are assuming that you are the same as the other person but you are wired differently! Use them as inspiration but don’t forget about yourself.  FOLLOW YOUR OWN AGENDA AND BE MORE AUTHENTIC.

9-      Craft your lifestyle around your personality type! Craft the self-actualization journey to your own unique personality.

[Miguel Oliveira]

thanks!!