Miguel Oliveira

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About Miguel Oliveira

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  1. Hi people. Don't know if this happening to some of you but I want to know your views and tips on this. Since I started meditating I note one thing that keeps hapenning. When I close my eyes to meditate I note that the eyes/eyeballs are always moving which leds to not concentrate and the mind being all over the place. Just this morning when I finish my meditation, I sense that the moving of the eyes can be the mind racing and that leads to the eyes never stop moving. Another thing is that all over the day and on meditation the eyes and on the middle of them I feel a lot of pressure. How do you guys deal with this? Thanks
  2. @winterknight hello. I started to get on the spiritual path due to a change of the self that I was years ago. This happened due to many obssessive thoughts and many mental vows that I made with myself that changed the whole person that I was. I sense that I'm too much in my head I started to follow the path of being more in my body, feeling the body cause I'm much in my head all the time and when I'm in my body I can work better in the world. I started to make body scan meditations and focused breathing. But after seeing videos I saw that instead of this mindfullness practices the one that can show me the true self is non-duality meditation. For someone that I so much in his head just like me, can't make connections with anyone, has a good job but still thinks that is inferior comparing to others what is the best pratice or is a way that this all time body awareness can led me to discover the true self? Thanks.
  3. @How to be wise what techniques do you recommend?
  4. Yeah. Like I want to let it all out let's say by screaming, I'm gonna feel a little self counscious about they listening and them they gonna ask questions and all that shit. Here we don't have like forest to go there and scream alone. Is just apartments with people eheh
  5. Hy people! Just had the experience that I was trying to get for a long time. I had extreme OCD and depression since 12 but over the years and with the help of some therapists that starting to not be so severe. But that was just me repressing the feelings and emotions and now my "emotional" body is full of blockages that changed the person that I was. From extroverted to a guy that has problems to talk to old ladies. But enough of that I start to search about ways to change this and things like shadow work, bioenergetics, EFT Tapping and many other came before my eyes. One thing that I struggle and I think that by itself is a blockage is that I feel that for me nothing gonna work. I start meditating a year ago but was very shallow, now with more experience I see that that thought and feeling that nothing's gonna work is just an illusion. But getting to the point. Today I decidided to do some shadow work (focusing on feelings and breathing) and the thing that I always wanted happened. I started to feel the emotions (the thing that I believed I never gonna feel cause nothing works for me) and tightness in my body (above the belly button and below the chest) started to appear and I started to vibrate and I just wanted to let it all out, screaming and that. One thing is that I live on a city and with friends at home and I feel a little self concious from doing this and they hearing. What you guys suggest from me to express and let out this when they are at home? Please share here your work on processing emotions and doing this "work" Thanks for everything
  6. @aurum yeah I see it. Accepting the fuck ups and then realize that I don't want that. I keep a journal about all things. Like when I feel so bad about my situation I write that and some motivation to grow myself kicks in but after some time that just goes away and I stay the way I was. I see this this last year. I get some motivation then after few days that goes away until the next fuck up ( relationship that fails, trying to be social and feel so much anxiety, being awkward around everyone) and this keeps being my life. I have an issue with commitment. I just feel a huge heavy feeling inside. Commitment for me is pain but I know that is so important. I think that this happen due to past traumas about breaking commitments and making vows that I would never again break another commitment. Now is just a drag for me. Thanks for your comment Aurum. PS: Love your channel!
  7. Hy guys! I'm getting out of a kind of relationship and being present with the emotions and patterns I sense that self love is extremely important. The feelings that I had towards the person were the ego getting validation, kindness, the love that I seek so much. Since my OCD and depression I transform myself from extroverted to super introverd and awkward, so much anxiety. The rush and excitment around love and relationships kinda gonna due to all the traumas that I had towards relationships and now I seek love and attention. The ego saw that the girl loved me and got to attached to her. Mentally the ego said that I loved her but with her I didn't felt that. He liked the attention and love. I told everything to her about the things I went through and I said that the best was for her to continue her life. But now I feel so bad, so sad, so lonely, isn't love but is the attachment from the ego to that girl and the feelings and heaviness in my body are so strong that I feel that I want her and I'm stuck. I just went to Tinder and she just reopen her account after she said to me that she not going to reopen the accoutn. I feel so bad due to the ego attachment but I was the guy that said to her that we break up was the best cause I don't love her and it's just the needy and ego side of me. But the feelings, the sadness are so strong. I know that is the ego and I'm trying to be the observer of the feelings and thoughts. I know that is a process and I'm gonna get it. The most important thing that I take from this experience that I'm going through is to have deep self love. I know internally that If I had self love this would be so different. I would accept that she just want to get a boyfriend. She loved me but I break up. I should be happy for her but the ego doesn't let me, the emotions, feelings don't let me. How you guys develop self love and self acceptance in this situation or another? I feel that I just gonna love really someone once I deeply love myself. Self love isn't a destination but a process. Internally I don't really love myself, I see myself as not like the other people, see myself as different. All my "friendships" are shallow, I feel alone in this world. Sorry for the english!
  8. @Jamie Universe yeah, thanks Jamie!
  9. @Jamie Universe yeah, it makes sense. One thing that I struggle is exactly that, going into groups of people and starting to get new friendships, seems that I can't connect with anyone. I talk to people and they don't connect, the conversation is shallow and doesn't exist that "spark". I see others making the same thing and they immediately connect with new people. I'm part of a group of guys that meet's up to discuss ideas, meeting girls and everyhting is well online, when we meet up I cannot connect, I talked with them but lacks connection, the others talked and created right away a connection.. I even with long time people that I know the relationships are not like the best friends type, they are shallow, conversations don't go deep.. I struggle with this.
  10. @ajasatya yeah
  11. @Shin sometimes I slack off in meditation. Weekly maybe 3-5 times. Yeah. I had just one long term relationship when I was 18 for 9 months with a girl that was always with me since 5 years old. We always had some chemistry and our families had a very good relationship, like they know and wanted for us to get on a relationship
  12. Hy people!! I´m here to hear your experiences and journey with this kind of work! I'm Miguel from Portugal!! I started to follow Marti's emotional healing guide and since them we have chatted. After 12 I started to get OCD and when I was 16 all my world changed due to a little but so little stress with a girl that hit me in all manners, body, mind, subconscious, hit me without explanation. After that the intelligent, extroverted Miguel turn into a introverted, social anxiety guy that has problems even to talk to a old lady on the grocerie store. Years of pain led me where I AM today, many therapist, hipnoses etc tried to fix me. Then I start to look online for all the questions that I had on my mind. Basicly my mind never stops, never, obsessive.. I started to search about meaning of life and all that things.. Then I really wanted to be the guy that I was with women and started to search about, saw all a comunity of guys that with some "techinques" and mindset have several relationships with girls above our level. I started to research about that and when I start apllying that something in me blocks me.. All that blockages that I have in me pop up and I'm stuck in life.. I can't connect with anyone, all the relationships with my friend are shallow, not like the other people... I saw Martis guide, I'm also going trought Julien Blanc Transformation Mastery and many teachings come to me.. Don't know if you guys are busy but if you can point me out to best manners to resolve this blockages that I have.. I'm finishing college and a part of me wants so bad to connect with people, to be the extroverted guy that I was, to have stories and almost nothing.. I have nothing to talk about this college years, I really want to connect with people but when I'm at parties or even at college I don't know what to talk, my mind gets full, I started getting like things that block my body, I feel super stiffled and nothing comes out and I'm very awkward. Even in college before I had the OCD and all that things that changed me I was the guy that had the best grades of the region and now I don't feel that, I have difficulties to resolve college problems (Software Engineering) and I feel dumb, stuck.. I know that this is all the things that I repressed, all the thing that are stuck in my subconcious and I want to change myself to be more natural, not fake.. I started to enter on "pick-up" cause I was always the guy that attracted girls to is life and loved it but a problem with one girl (very small problem but she mentally manipulated me) change the guy that I was, the OCD that I had got so much worse and then I feel like I had to say sorry to everyone, I made vows that I would never made something bad to a girl and years and years, everyday saying that to myself, putting new beliefs on my subconscious and from an extroverted guy I'm now I guy that is shy to talk about with old ladies. I saw teaching about loving the shadow, not doing the breath work to let go of that emotions, just love them and they will change, other teaching say to let go of that sensations.. If you can share your wisdom with me will be amazing!! Sorry for the rant!! :-P
  13. @supremeyingyang Hy, how do you reframed it?
  14. @YaNanNallari yep it's true. Very good point view. I think that the major problem is deep subconscious blockages that I have from my past. I remember when I was a kid saying to myself that I never felt real love to someone (like on the TV shows that I'd watch) and I was always trying to find love in another person. Probably I felt love but the way I thought that love was wasn't the love that I felt!! (mindfuck). I'm seeing some approaches to remove those blockages!! What you think @YaNanNallari ?