Journal/-ISTJ

[Zeroguy]

I am an ISTJ personality type.

In this journal I will track my life progress. Since I am introvert I love my alone time . While I am alone I research.

I need to set my goals.

[Zeroguy]

Current goal is to get on disability since I suffer from schizoaffective disorder.

I've been with my GP to see what of documentation do I need.

Haven't called J. these last two days I will call her tomorrow to set up a date.

[Yimpa]

@Zeroguy Godspeed and have a nice day  

[Zeroguy]

Started collecting documents for getting disability payments. 

Right now I am in mental hospital to get some papers needed.

 

[Zeroguy]

Woken up at 6:00 am.
Took a shower, brushed my teeth and made coffee for me and my father.
Went to mental hospital to take some documents and reports I need to claim disability.
Went to grocery shop.
Cleaned bathroom.
Made lunch.

Talked with J. over the phone.

[Zeroguy]

Just got delivered new washing machine.

Started chatting with S.

[Zeroguy]

I haven't spoke to J. and S. today.

I started being into personal development started watching his old video.Soirituality and epistemic stuff I will skip.

Suffered paranoia today for few hours.

[Zeroguy]

Paranoid thoughts and feelings are real problem. My psychiatrist doubled my dose of anti psychotics but still they don't work.

I take haldol and Clozapine. Clozapine is for treatment resistant schizophrenia.

 

[Zeroguy]

I am in psychosis and paranoia it started 40 minutes ago. We will see how much it will last.

I am not feeling well.

[Zeroguy]

Still paranoid. 

I want to become better son. 

[Zeroguy]

Still paranoid, I will try surrender meditation. Maybe talk about it with my psychiatrist because I got my Clozapine doubled and it still doesn't work. Clozapine is used for treatment resistant schizophrenia.

 

[Zeroguy]

Today I have not experienced paranoia and psychosis. 

House is in real mess. I have to clean it up.

Got some clothes from my rich neighbor.

I'm waiting for him to offer me remote job for an American company, he knows the owner of business. When company owner from New England comes to Serbia he will ask him for a job.

I am robotics technician.

[Zeroguy]

Have cleaned the house and I am not feeling paranoid.

If I get disability that means I can't work anymore.

So I will try to become chess GrandMaster and learn accounting. Course costs 400$.

Will try to convince J. who is master economist that we open accounting company.

[Zeroguy]

I switched off Clozapine for Olanzapine because I run out of it. Tomorrow I have to collect it from pharmacy. I feel strange.

I made myself a promise that I will not read this forum.

[Zeroguy]

3 days I am on Clozapine and no paranoia or psychosis. I feel well let's hope it will last.

Currently my life is on pause until I recover stability of my mind..

[Zeroguy]

I do need positive outlook on life.

Find something you are passionate about and create something beautiful. That's advice I was given from Leo and Cetus.

Good advices.

Yesterday I had psychosis it lasted for 3 hours.

I am right now going to psychiatrist.

Stability of mind not reached so life is still on pause.