Being a leader

[Olaf]

I think one of the biggest things that is stopping guys is that they are afraid to step into a leadership position. If anything I have learned this year is to lead men, leading men is a hard skill, because you have to level up yourself. Yet you can grow much quicker if your intention is to lead, because now you aren't only trying to help yourself out, but you are trying to help all the men out. I lead people I have never met before, that I don't get anything from in return. Yet that help me to become a better leader, even think about this forum, I am probably one of the few here who is contributing a ton of value by my posts, I gain a little bit from being here, but ultimately I am doing this to share knowledge that other men (or woman) could use. Knowledge that is from direct experience of my own life. The opposite side I see too much not only on this forum, but in real life aswell, is this idea of bringing eachother down. This is not a leader, a leader never tries to bring people down, maybe clairify, but not lead people feeling bad about themself. Sure positive feedback, but not critisism, that is insecurity.

A leader should push guys out of their comfort zone, make them take action, keep them accountable, literally even talk about their feelings. Many times I go sit down with a guy I am helping and asking "how are you feeling now?" and "what will make you feel better?" almost no one asks these questions to guys as it is not "normal" to talk about your feelings, when it is the most important thing. If you are feeling bad, good luck making positive things happen in your life. Feeling good is more important than just grinding and hustling and endlessly taking action. Don't get me wrong, it should be a combo of the two, action and feeling good.

And the idea of less for them is more for me, is a scarcity perspective. I like to look at life the other way, more for them is more for me, it is more joy, more energy and motivation, more leadership skills, more knowledge even, because you learn from helping others more than doing things yourself. Ego is trying to do everything yourself, it is not meant to be that way, surely you should avoid wrong company, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't rely on others, there are plenty good people out there that you should lead, don't even look at the top dogs, look at guys with potential, those are easily accessible and you will be suprised how much you can do and also find people who are already good leaders so you can learn how to lead. 

I don't belief you are a real men unless you are trying to build others up, the only time I feel it is necessary to bring someone down is when they do loads of harm to a big group, like Bentinho Massaro, that is the only time I feel that it is actually responsible to take them down, but besides that there is no reason to bring people down, it will not make yourself feel good anyways and therefor good things won't happen to you.