How do I know if I’m seeking wholeness or intensity?

[Monster Energy]

What I struggle with isn’t really temptation. It’s the meaning I’ve given sexuality. It has become one of the most important things in my life, and I genuinely love the intensity and aliveness that comes with it.

At the same time, part of me wants freedom. Not freedom from sexuality itself, but freedom from being attached to it.

My fear is that if I let go of the attachment, I’ll lose something valuable. Maybe what I’m attached to isn’t sexuality itself but a certain kind of intensity.

I’ve heard Leo say that what we’re really seeking is wholeness rather than the object of desire. The problem is that I’ve never experienced myself free from this attachment, so I honestly don’t know.

How can I tell whether I’m attached to sexuality, attached to intensity, or actually seeking something deeper?

I’m asking because this inner conflict has become exhausting. I feel torn between wanting freedom and not wanting to lose something I love. I genuinely don’t know how to move forward

 

[Leo Gura]

Sexual craving is more akin to hunger than it is to attachment.

You aren't attached to food, your body craves it. Likewise with sex. Unless you got some additional attachment on top of that, which is possible.

If your hromones changed your craving for sex would change or even disappear. This will happen naturally as you get older.

Your body is seeking sex. Your spirit is seeking higher things. In the same way that your spirit may seek God but your body just wants some ice cream.

Edited 2 hours ago by Leo Gura

[Monster Energy]

7 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

Sexual craving is more akin to hunger than it is to attachment.

You aren't attached to food, your body craves it. Likewise with sex. Unless you got some additional attachment on top of that, which is possible.

If your hromones changed your craving for sex would change or even disappear. This will happen naturally as you get older.

Your body is seeking sex. Your spirit is seeking higher things. In the same way that your spirit may seek God but your body just wants some ice cream.

My struggle feels more psychological than biological. It’s the meaning and significance I’ve attached to sexuality that seems to bind me.

This has drained a tremendous amount of life force from me over the years. The constant inner conflict has left me feeling dry, exhausted, and increasingly empty. Sometimes I relate to the image of Jesus in his final days, carrying a burden that never seems to leave. The difference is that for me, it feels like I’ve been carrying it every day for years.

 

 

 

[Monster Energy]

I’m a slave to my impulses. I love it and I hate it. This will lead to my death if I don’t choose freedom. I look lifeless because I didn’t choose myself but instead chose external things.

 

[Leo Gura]

34 minutes ago, Monster Energy said:

My struggle feels more psychological than biological. It’s the meaning and significance I’ve attached to sexuality that seems to bind me.

This has drained a tremendous amount of life force from me over the years. The constant inner conflict has left me feeling dry, exhausted, and increasingly empty. Sometimes I relate to the image of Jesus in his final days, carrying a burden that never seems to leave. The difference is that for me, it feels like I’ve been carrying it every day for years.

The solution is to not focus too much on sex but focus on your life purpose and personal and spiritual development, without rejecting sex.

[Monster Energy]

10 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

The solution is to not focus too much on sex but focus on your life purpose and personal and spiritual development, without rejecting sex.

I don’t know if what I’m holding onto is just a compulsive pattern or something genuinely valuable.

How do you know when letting go is growth, and not loss of something important?