I'm actually

[TruthFreedom]

I'm actually just getting drunk every day, and so deep into this solipsism nonsense that nothing makes sense any more. Arguing with my neighbour who's Schizophrenic, and wondering so deeply about life, then waking up and realising that this is all there is, then wondering why I didn't just get a job like everyone else, then thinking what an arsehole I am for sitting on my ass every day, when there's so many people contributing, and what the fuck am I doing, I'm a nobody who's identity is tied around their problems, and then I think there's no free will anyway, so why bother, then I think about having a big mac or something, then I realise how insignificant I am, then...then I wonder what my neighbour is doing, and it seems she wants to abuse me again...for no reason. I'm 

[caspex]

Your problem doesn't seem to stem from spirituality, I think you are using it to justify your behavior. It seems like from your post that you need a lot of normal self-help with developing motivation and discipline in life. Take a break from spirituality not because it is bullshit but because your ego is using genuine insights to spin its bullshit. 

This is quite common and I have gone through the same shit. For me it was the fear of failure, bad relationships, attachment to the past and other such issues which kept me down. Addiction and an unfit body also contributed massively to my depression. I used to believe that if I could just get one more insight that's just one degree deeper I would miraculously escape my depression. That's just not how it works.

You probably need genuine shadow work, emotional healing, and discovering yourself(not in the spiritual sense). Trust me when I say this.

If I striped you of all the spiritual insights you'd still be just as miserable because the real problem is a lack of development. This is why many traditions across the world have had practices to build and purify one's body and mind before attempting deep spiritual awakenings.

 

Edited 19 hours ago by caspex

[Carl-Richard]

4 hours ago, TruthFreedom said:

sitting on my ass every day, when there's so many people contributing, and what the fuck am I doing, [...], and then I think there's no free will anyway, so why bother

You have free will in the sense that you feel like you're in control of your actions. If you deny this feeling, you are self-sabotaging yourself. Be very rigorous about distinguishing between the feeling of being in control and any metaphysical notions of free will. They are NOT the same.

"I could do this, but there is no metaphysical free will, so why bother?" is a thought that ruins your sense of self-agency and control. It's a purely delusional and self-sabotaging thought, it doesn't help for anything but immobilizing yourself and denying yourself the right to be who you want to be.

And I suggest dropping the idea of solipsism and simply going with what you actually experience. Thoughts about solipsism don't matter. They are ultimately distractions. The point about absolute truth is it doesn't depend on what you merely think about it. So don't even think about it. You don't have to. It's ironically another form of self-sabotage. Your goal is to realize what is beyond thinking but you keep thinking about it as if it is supposed to help. It's not. Drop it if your goal is realizing the absolute.

Edited 15 hours ago by Carl-Richard

[TruthFreedom]

@Carl-Richard I am simple-minded. I think this is a good thing. People over complicate everything. 

 

[Breakingthewall]

4 hours ago, caspex said:

Your problem doesn't seem to stem from spirituality, I think you are using it to justify your behavior. It seems like from your post that you need a lot of normal self-help with developing motivation and discipline in life. Take a break from spirituality not because it is bullshit but because your ego is using genuine insights to spin its bullshit. 

This is quite common and I have gone through the same shit. For me it was the fear of failure, bad relationships, attachment to the past and other such issues which kept me down. Addiction and an unfit body also contributed massively to my depression. I used to believe that if I could just get one more insight that's just one degree deeper I would miraculously escape my depression. That's just not how it works.

You probably need genuine shadow work, emotional healing, and discovering yourself(not in the spiritual sense). Trust me when I say this.

If I striped you of all the spiritual insights you'd still be just as miserable because the real problem is a lack of development. This is why many traditions across the world have had practices to build and purify one's body and mind before attempting deep spiritual awakenings.

 

A post coherent and intelligent. Long time without reading any. 

[caspex]

6 hours ago, Breakingthewall said:

A post coherent and intelligent. Long time without reading any. 

Somebody has to say the boring stuff, and it often gets ignored.

When I was in the same sort of rut I didn't even want to read the boring stuff because I automatically assumed that's all basic stuff that can never help me who was dealing with much higher problems.

There was a sort of pride in my suffering. 

This is exactly what I needed though. You'd be surprised how much a little bit of discipline solves in life.

Edited 8 hours ago by caspex

[Breakingthewall]

4 hours ago, caspex said:

Somebody has to say the boring stuff, and it often gets ignored.

When I was in the same sort of rut I didn't even want to read the boring stuff because I automatically assumed that's all basic stuff that can never help me who was dealing with much higher problems.

There was a sort of pride in my suffering. 

This is exactly what I needed though. You'd be surprised how much a little bit of discipline solves in life.

This is the forum of spiritual bypassing. Nobody is interested in real work, just in some relief and ego inflation. But that's not only here , that's spirituality in general . Believing I'm consciousness, I'm god, I'm creating my suffering because I want, etc. Spirituality is like anything else, who sells is who says what people want to listen. 

Edited 4 hours ago by Breakingthewall