My Game Awakening (Men/Masculinity Version?)

[Xonas Pitfall]

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Attractive interaction with women is about one thing: PLAY. You play with them. This is the master key to success with women. The inability to be playful is why guys fail at attracting girls. All of game is about training yourself to be in a playful mode. This is especially difficult for highly logical, uptight, introverted, socially inexperienced, anxious, cerebral, autistic men. Anxiety, fear, insecurity, and overthinking destroy one’s ability to be playful. The reason alcohol is so popular is because it automatically shuts down anxiety, fear, insecurity, logicality, and overthinking — making it effortless to be playful. But of course alcohol is unhealthy so I never used it.

What would be the male version of this?
Attractive interaction with men is about one thing: Openness? Reactivity?

Or maybe it all just points to "play", just expressed through different playstyles.

Haha, funny... the key insight to 🎮 🕹️ GAME is PLAY! 🎮 🕹️

[Spiral]

It’s practically the same just in a different way.
 

Men want to experience a woman. Women want men to give them an experience.

Experience here is emotional.

[Xonas Pitfall]

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Men want to experience a woman.

What do they want to experience? And why don’t women want to experience men? Or do women want to be experienced, “have fun with,” or “played with”?

P.S. I don’t know myself; I’m just asking opposing questions to feel it out, haha.

[Spiral]

@Xonas Pitfall There isn’t much in men to experience, but they can influence how women feel in a meaningful way. 

How women feel can be proxy for men, to experience more emotionally.

Sort of

[Xonas Pitfall]

Just now, Spiral said:

@Xonas Pitfall There isn’t much in men to experience, but they can influence how women feel in a meaningful way. 

How women feel can be proxy for men, to experience more emotionally.

Sort of

How so? Do you mind elaborating on that more? Very interesting.

[Leo Gura]

12 hours ago, Xonas Pitfall said:

What would be the male version of this?

Tits?

[Xonas Pitfall]

@Leo Gura Hmm... not universal enough, some have different tastes in their "ahem... preferred areas of indulgence."  Understanding may require deeper, Judo-level insight 🤔

 

[Spiral]

Women crave safety, a to degree most men can’t fathom. 

Men can provide safety, or some men can. 

Women who feel safe are happy, and happy wife, happy life

Women allow men to experience more, when they are happy, than what men can experience alone.

Edited Wednesday at 02:44 PM by Spiral

[Spiral]

A woman whom is not open and authentic will not be able give men what they desire in this case. Since they are a poor proxy.

[Xonas Pitfall]

30 minutes ago, Spiral said:

@Xonas Pitfall There isn’t much in men to experience, but they can influence how women feel in a meaningful way. 

How women feel can be proxy for men, to experience more emotionally.

Sort of

@Spiral Got it, 

But what are you pointing to with “experience” here? What are they trying to experience, raw emotion? Her reactivity? Receptivity?

Because from what you said earlier, it sounds like women want to experience men as a proxy for safety. But then you also said, “There isn’t much of men to experience. Men want to experience women. There isn’t much in men to experience, but they can influence how women feel in a meaningful way. ”

[MuadDib]

20 minutes ago, Xonas Pitfall said:

@Leo Gura Hmm... not universal enough, some have different tastes in their "ahem... preferred areas of indulgence."  Understanding may require deeper, Judo-level insight 🤔

 

A smile

[Xonas Pitfall]

2 minutes ago, MuadDib said:

A smile

Why? *smiles* 

[Spiral]

@Xonas Pitfall Men can give women the experience/feeling of safety. Men are not a proxy.

Men want the emotion, the secret sauce they can’t generate on their own, that the woman’s reactivity enables.

[Spiral]

A smile can be a from of transference of emotions, one that men deeply appreciate. 

[Xonas Pitfall]

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Men want the emotion, the secret sauce they can’t generate on their own, that the woman’s reactivity enables.

Super interesting to me. Can you explain more? 

Do you feel like this is something you're missing? Do you think all or most men feel this way too? Why do you feel like you’re apart from it, or cut off from it? Why can only a woman bring this out?

Can you go more into detail about how you feel when you’re around someone who’s open and receptive? What does that feel like for you?

[Spiral]

@Xonas Pitfall I like the metaphor of a princess and a knight.

A knight must be a competent fighter in order to make the princess feel safe. A knight that is too controlled by his emotions and feels them too strongly will not be a competent fighter.

Even when the world is cruel and terrible, he needs to be in his full mental capacity. Perhaps even more so than normally.

So while he can feel emotions, he doesn’t do so to the same extent the princess does. 

However this gives a him limited experience of the world, one the princess can provide when appropriate by just being herself.

However the princess has another fear, what if he is a competent fighter but doesn’t want to risk his life to keep her safe? How that works, I’ll let you figure out.

As for me, well I don’t experience the world as deeply as women do. I do really like being able to through her, experience more of the world. It’s like a hidden extra aspect of reality. It similar to always being able to only be see in monochrome but being able to wear glasses that lets you see colors.

Edited Wednesday at 03:23 PM by Spiral

[Xonas Pitfall]

1 minute ago, Spiral said:

As for me, well I don’t experience the world as deeply as women do. I do really like being able to through her, experience more of the world. It’s like a hidden extra aspect of reality. It similar to always being able to only be seen in monochrome but being able to wear glasses that lets you see colors.

I find this stuff deeply interesting. Thank you for sharing so much!

Would you say that range of emotion is very important to you? Her experiencing strong happiness, excitement, fear, gratefulness, love, crying. How do you experience that?

Is it like everything has more depth, more intensity, more color? Like, if you're happy by x1 point for getting your favorite coffee, and she's happy by x20 points for the same thing, does that amplify your mutual happiness?

[Xonas Pitfall]

Would you also say this is one of the most important traits a woman can have for you? Or are there others you consider more important? How would you personally rank it?

[Spiral]

@Xonas Pitfall it’s deeply feminine to experience emotions deeply, and very appealing to men. However being an emotional mess and fluctuating constantly will not appeal to men.

Negative emotions are also tricky, they belong and are important as well but we can’t deal with them very well. That is partly why men try to solve issues that women bring up, even though she just wants to talk about it. We were never supposed to be able to handle that.

I think women generally feel emotions strongly enough. But they might try to hide them or resist being open enough to feel fully. 

So yeah it’s very attractive. However it dangerous to ask men these things. We don’t fully understand ourselves so we might just tell you what we like as oppose to what attracts us. The latter of course is more important if you’d like to find a male partner.

All of these applies to heterosexual men that are more masculinity oriented.

Edited Wednesday at 03:52 PM by Spiral

[Xonas Pitfall]

@Spiral

Thank you! I'd still love to hear it all. I don't feel like a lot of spaces talk about this openly enough, or they filter it through a more “HR/PC-friendly” lens.

What would you say is deeply feminine for you? Is it mostly that emotional depth? How does that manifest?

Is it something more purely reserved for a sexual context, like when she intensifies all the pleasure you're giving her through moaning, enjoyment, etc.? Or is it also present in day-to-day life, getting excited, being expressive, playful, or emotionally raw? Do you have any examples?

It's interesting that you mentioned feeling more discomfort with the negative emotions. I’d be curious to hear more about that as well.

Also, what else do you feel is an important aspect of the feminine that’s deeply attractive but not talked about often?