lmfao

Member
 View profile  See their activity

  • Content count

    2,875

  • Joined

  • Last visited

Everything posted by lmfao

  1. hahaha might be
  2. @Megan Alecia I’m not saying “SD is wrong”. A word or idea is meaningless alone, it’s about how it’s animated in a person. Me personally I like SD, but that's not the point. Even if I hated SD that wouldn't change the "validity" of what I'm saying. People seem to spam SD instead of any actual insight or understanding of things. There’s an image/impression that is repeatedly clung to. Whatever the topic, it’s the first place their brain jumps to for making a link. Why do you need these colours to understand or see things? Lots of people say in defence “yeah it’s just a model and map isn’t territory”, but many say those words without it being reflected in how they perceive or be. Perhaps in the bigger picture, SD is the arbitrary/dummy/placeholder symbol that allows people in this particular place to justify meaningless chatter and misperception. You could perhaps say the problem isn't rooted in SD since it's just 1 of many symbols and outward forms that the same delusions and misperceptions can take.
  3. You made the post for sharing what you've noticed with others. Putting that aside, the first place to go to is your relationship to the statements and dogmas. Because its about whether you get "sucked in" and buy into it. I think if you wanted to avoid the dogmatic thinking on this forum, I'd say avoid excessive Spiral Dynamics discussion as well as the politics section.

  4. have anyone experienced eternity?

    lmfao replied to Conscious life's topic in Personal Development -- [Main]

    @Conscious life Sometimes all it takes is a few seconds of clear seeing to leave a large impression. Ofc it isn't literally eternity, I don't think a human could have that, idk. But we have time dilation in our perception. Back when I was into meditation more, I used to be very obsessed with time and flux. And I still am. I don't know how only the present moment exists yet there's flux, it's miraculous.
  5. I got into the habit of making my paragraphs short. To break up text more. Because my eyes go trippy if I see large blocks of text which aren't differentiated. But that's a me thing. If your posts just have that many words though then simply breaking up the text more won't make much a difference. But either way, I'm sure there are ways to write it, format it and present it that make it engaging. But also remember that you can't please or attract everyone to your post, so just do what your version of good is
  6. Scrolling the forum too much just to waste time or distract myself Not reading all the old threads filled with good advice on problems I have in the Health & Nutrition section, and applying the advice As for my personality, sometimes I'm arrogant and less openminded because of it. But the source of that "arrogance" is a confidence or "knowing" that I've experienced or have inquired about something. If you feel accomplished or proficient in whatever domain, I think "arrogance" sprouting from confidence is almost inevitable unless you're careful. That confidence can obviously get coopted by insecurities and etc Sometimes I attack and antagonise people I think are very foolish.

  7. I feel like Beige

    lmfao replied to Blackbeat's topic in Mental Health, Serious Emotional Issues

    I feel beige when I'm so lazy to even stand up from my chair and grab water despite being really thirsty. I think that makes me below beige actually, since I'm too lazy to even follow my biological instincts lool
  8. @Javfly33 So you were wondering why there's this toxic environment at work rooted in identity/ego which is unnecessary for the business could be? And then later on in your post you were likening the survival of the business to the survival of our physical body? I don't know what to make of a lot of "evil" and ego because I see a lot of what happens as the result of, ultimately innocent, misunderstandings. "Unconsciousness is/causes innocent misunderstanding" is what things look a bit like to me. It's very weird to see and makes me wonder what the point or meaning behind any of it all is.

  9. Moving out from parents house

    lmfao replied to NoSelfSelf's topic in Personal Development -- [Main]

    @Displayname1 those are some nice rugs
  10. @levani I'd say bye to my friends and family. Meditate for a bit, probably with an intensity I've never had before. Listen to my favourite pieces of music.
  11. Verbally that's about it. "Everything is nothing, and there will never not be nothing" are words you could use -- On the other hand. Things like souls and past lives are conjecture imo
  12. Chigau!!!! It's Akiyama Shinichi, main character from a manga called "Liar Game". He's 10 times smarter than Light Yagami. Manga is about a bunch of people who are forced to play in underground gambling tournaments for getting out of debt. All the games they play are strategic and centrally psychological in mechanics. Deception and outwitting the opponent, both IQ or EQ wise. So it has some similar things to Death Note, but better.
  13. I have no verbal answer or answer contained in thought to give. No logical or rational answer. And I doubt anyone here has one either. A hypothetical solipsistic POV: Only my direct experience exists. [Therefore other people's point of views don't exist.] Therefore I will have no morality. I have not seen this line of thought bubble in me. And I don't know why. I don't find paying attention to the fact only my experience exists as making me selfish, and I don't know why. Thoughts and theories pop into mind but they just dissolve. If you asked me why I'm good or not good, why I be or do X thing, I couldn't tell you. And that's pretty funny.
  14. @EternalForest It sounds like you want that/some high state of blissful love of everything? Not saying that that's bad or you shouldn't do that, but is that what it is? The way you said "I'd like to believe that everything is love" either sounds like crushed spirits in the aftermath of failure or the expression of a religious person having doubts that their beliefs are true. All I can say is that for myself I don't aim for love in that way. "I aim for truth and freedom." Whenever I'm healing some neurotic part of me or doing, it feels painful and sucks, it doesn't "feel good". Your post seems to centre around regret that things don't feel good, and you wish they did. Is that accurate? I say this not to degrade or mock you or that position. But to see if that's what's going on. -- I don't know who on earth gave you the idea you shouldn't dislike anything or anyone. Your feelings of hatred may enter repression and build up. Maybe reading Radical Honesty by Brad Blanton would do you good.
  15. Indeed. The "consequences" of solipsism aren't what you would typically predict with logic. I.e. Becoming "selfish" and immoral
  16. @Vibroverse I am not insulting solipsism, quite the opposite.
  17. @Preety_India yeah I'd say this feels like family to me. In the sense that this place feels natural and familiar, that I don't have to put up social guards and I can just be me. Since (like you) I've been here a while, this place very integrated in me. What I mean is that I might "take this place for granted" in the same way I take being able to brush my teeth and eat breakfast in the mornings for granted. It's near that level of ease and comfort.

  18. lmfao replied to lmfao's topic in Self-Actualization Journals

    So I read the first chapter of "Letting Go" by David Hawkins, again, since I only read that much of the book a few months ago. I take it more as an invitation to be less unconscious. I encircled various sentences with pencil, ranging from key points to things I found interesting but/and "don't agree with". A lot of things I disagreed with. One of his key points was that external events perhaps don't cause negative emotion, that they are outlets for displacement, egoic justification for expressing what negative emotion we already had stored up. There were more interesting key points that I can't be bothered to type about right now. -- Whether by pure coincidence or "synchronicity", my mum walks into my room and asked me whether [alright, as I was typing this sentence I noticed my mum was free. So I stopped typing this, walked up and I talked to her to resolve the situation].....Uh okay so how should I go about writing this. So as I'm reading, my mum walks into the room and asks me to change the clean bedsheets in my room because she doesn't like the dull colours ( and they are mismatching colours) and she doesn't want the cleaners who are coming around to see it. I talk about it pretty casually/nonchalantly about how it doesn't matter, because it doesn't. Abruptly I feel conditioned fear arise as I sense she's about to slap me. She slaps me "playfully" , I slap her back and I'm pissed off, but I didn't properly communicate it. She's whatever. Slightly joyful and happy because she think she "pranked me" and I didn't expect it. But also because of some unhealthy psychology of hers, where she thinks is fun/joyful to invoke fear and control in others. She just walks out the room and conversation end. Anyway, it later "ended" with her being sorry because she thought it was innocent. But of course she didn't take it seriously and lacks the capacity to appreciate boundaries. But I wont ramble about that too much. -- I continue reading David Hawkins, finishing the chapter. Whilst I'm reading, and then afterwards for a while, I'm sitting by myself and paying attention to my feelings. I pay attention to the negative feelings which are always there, but I push into the peripheral vision of my consciousness. So there's lots of random fluctuations, flux, etc. But at some point the negative emotions grow and grow, I'm caught up in thought stories which whirl and whirl around like tornados, and the negative emotion is very strong. And I feel it as I type now still- __________ Aaaaaaaaand TLDR I feel drained from paying attention to my negative emotions. But I'm not that drained, its likely some psychological reaction and defence mechanism by my mind to not dig deeper. Recently I question and wonder whether an "unconscious" really exists. Since if something is unconscious, it's out of your experience in a sense. But. There are these emotions and things in the periphery of your current consciousness which are there but we ignore. I feel a burning desire to break the wall between me and what's alien. Someone else might phrase it as trying to "breakthrough into the unconscious".
  19. @Dunnel Do you feel worse after meditation because there's nothing, e.g. technology, which is distracting you from the negative emotion?
  20. Ah I see Also, I didn't even realise till you said it that you could hide posts lol
  21. If you want a remove a user tag on mobile, do this. Sandwich the tag between text. e.g. "Hello@lmfaoHello" , highlight all of the text and click backspace.
  22. @Intraplanetary I don't think so. From a certain space I might say "spiral dynamics is true". But I've learnt that just because something is true, or because you can say it is true, doesn't mean that it's useful or helpful to think in the terms of that model. ___ Another tip I'd give is to see spiral dynamics (or whatever exact model you're using) as a lot more approximate, less linear and less hierarchical.
  23. @Muhammad Jawad I asked a question about lesson 4 and concentration as well, just above, if it helps. About your first question. As a first step, pay attention to the experience of having a physical head in your experience. How exactly that feels. Then from there, pay attention to different areas (inside the head, not just the surface of your face as well). And you should be able to figure it out. Don't expect all of this to be exact and precise. You'll learn from direct experience how the actuality of having a physical body with sensations contrasts what expectations you had.
  24. Being able to just be happy without circumstance isn't trivial. Everyone's got their own load of shit, and all people are fundamentally the same at root. But some people have more negative states to consciousness which its harder to surrender or be happy with. I.e. Health, physical and mental. BUT even if life is unfair and you were dealt a shit hand, there's probably still a path for you. It might just be a lot more painful though. -- I think if you are severely miserable, at some level you have to have acceptance of your situation. And I'm mainly typing that for myself to hear.
  25. @soos_mite_ah I'm in a really similar situation lol. I've been with my family since March 2020 and it's my 3rd year of uni right now. I'm on track for a 4 year masters degree, but I hate what I'm studying. Even though I hate physics now, I decided to finish this 3rd year at least to get a degree, and try and enjoy the student/University life before it ends. Well it's already ended, and I never took advantage of university or student life. I'm clueless about life purpose. The clock is ticking, the real world is about to break its way into my house of sheltered ignorance. --- About this whole dealing with toxic family thing. No answers here, I probably handle it worse than you. My bad habits being denial and conflict avoidance. Losing control of emotions easily But. I'm working on the capacity for honesty with myself and others. And it makes me able to be very "matter of fact", but in an emotionally sensitive way. I have to make sure I don't fall into the trap of being a cold, calculating, walking corpse. Cauterising my own emotional nervous system. It's a bad pathology I'm susceptible to. Because there's a way to do it such that you don't become devoid of all inner spark and playfulness. Probably "role models" like Peter Ralston or David Hawkins. I don't know what I am or what my personality is anymore.