Emerald

When I was 20, I tried Ayahuasca twice, both of which resulted in what the video calls Satori except for the fact that it was anything but exhausting and would live every day of my life from that paradigm if I could. But it was not a permanent awakening, so after the Ayahuasca wore off I was back down to my normal level of consciousness and in a state dominated by fear. The only difference was that I had memories of the insights I experienced during the Satori experience. But the thing about wisdom, that I didn't realize until years later, is that wisdom is only wisdom when experienced in the present moment with the current circumstance. It's like Heraclitus said "You can't step in the same river twice." So, something that's wise one moment may be foolish the next. So, I ended up less conscious after my experiences and not more. But it did show me that there was something there. Prior to that experience I was agnostic leaning heavily atheist with an extreme allergy to anything spiritually related. So, I never would have sought enlightenment had I not experienced firsthand that there was something there to seek. I would have dismissed it as hogwash. But if you're already on board with seeking enlightenment, you don't need psychedelics and they can cause a lot of problems. It completely destroyed my value system and sent my life off course. Things are better now, but I really could have crashed and burned. Everything fell apart. So, I recommend not trying psychedelics because if you don't get a Satori experience, fine. But if you do, it's a lot like opening up Pandora's Box.

Perhaps. It's why I said to take what I say with a grain of salt. I only see him in the context of his videos.

Take what I say with a grain of salt because I don't know him and I'm not him. But if I had to guess from only watching his videos, I believe it's that Leo has subtle dogma that he's not yet conscious of, so he hasn't been able yet to fully let go. I believe that, deep down Leo holds an attachment to making his life significant as to not regret things on his death bed. He wants to avoid that and sees it as negative, so there's an attachment to what's good and bad in relation to his fear of regret.

You're welcome!

Yes. I've been there too. I try to stack too many things on my plate and I can't sustain it very well. But be careful approaching enlightenment in the same way that you would approach other goals (career and personal development) as enlightenment is not a goal, even if it's your desired outcome. It works differently. Willpower and determination can be your enemy in some senses because it has a lot to do with resistance and bringing yourself somewhere. Enlightenment is all about removing illusions, letting go of attachments, and being what you are. Now, you have to have enough willpower to do the inquiry and meditation work. But willpower can get in the way of surrender and letting go. I relate it to a paper printing out and willpower trying to pull the paper out as it's printing and the message becoming smeared. Or a flower that you want to grow faster so you pull on it but your results are just an uprooting and not a growing. So, you have to paradoxically will yourself to seek enlightenment while also letting go of will and seeking of enlightenment. My recommendation is just to take time to observe your perceptions (including thoughts) as they are without any preconceived notions superimposed over top of them. Best of luck!

You're welcome! As long as you are mindful, these things should melt away naturally.

This is great. It's exactly what I needed to read. I'm always trying to escape all the time using contemplation and personal development, and there's this constant fear. I find it very difficult to just be still and be with myself without distracting myself with thought. This will help me release resistance to my meditation practice and take it at my own pace. I have a difficult time finding time (or that's what I tell myself- I think I'm actually afraid) so I haven't been very consistent with my meditation practice, missing days all the time. Then I beat myself up because of Leo's 'never skip a day' idea and I feel guilty because I don't feel like I can do this yet as I've had a habit of disassociation since childhood... and I think it makes my resistance worse even though on the conscious level I take this very good advice with a grain of salt, as missing one day won't magically undo progress. I understand it to be more about keeping any practice consistent.

One thing to be careful about is resistance. If you've made the decision 'intellectually' or 'logically' as to what you should give up, this is likely working at cross-purposes to letting go. So, if you have rules that you've made for yourself, like "I shouldn't enjoy _____." or "I shouldn't be doing _______." or "I have to give up ______" This is coming at it from the wrong angle. You must recognize that your desires, including your desire for enlightenment are not something that you can get rid of through willpower or talking yourself out of it. It just becomes unconscious which is the opposite direction than you want to go in. Instead, allow yourself to go head first into whatever your desires come up... but be mindful while you do it. You can then notice more and more of your internal experience and with attention all illusions melt away. Letting go is what you want. Suppression is the opposite of letting go.

Thank you for supporting my channel! I'm glad that you like it.

Well, I can't say that I have experience with this social dynamic as I was raised in America. But if I'm brutally honest, looking at it from an outsider's view, (I hope I don't sound ignorant saying this) I feel really bad for people who live under these seemingly arbitrary social restraints. To me, these ideas and norms seem very pointless and seem to really sap the life out of people. However, I did not grow up in your particular culture, so I don't know if these norms still serve a practical function or if it's just maintaining tradition for the sake of maintaining tradition. But having lived the life that I live now, I would ask myself given that I only have one life, "Do I want to live the life that I want to live?" or "Do I want to live an inauthentic life simply to maintain my family's social status?" Of course, there may be consequences for your parents if you bring shame to the family, that I'm not aware of. Maybe it would get in the way of them living a good life because they wouldn't be allowed to do things that they would normally be allowed to do. So, given this consequence, it would be a tough decision to make. I wouldn't want to deprive my family of their freedom because I want my freedom. But if it's only a maintaining a positive reputation for the sake of maintaining a positive reputation and posturing to the people in the society, I would never sacrifice my most authentic desires for this because this is a pointless struggle. If I were put in this situation, I would tell my parents very firmly that I will marry whoever I want to marry and that's all there is to it. If they were to disown me, then I would let them go as it's not my responsibility to keep them comfortable with their social standing no matter how ingrained in the culture it is. But this is likely an outgrowth of my cultural background which is big on individuality and independence. And it's a pretty dysfunctional society too... so who knows if this is really healthier or better. But do know that leaving and doing whatever you want to do is ALWAYS an option, even if it's painful and scary. You don't have to live in a place and follow customs that are inauthentic to you. If your family cares about you more than they care about their social status, then they will begrudgingly understand. If they care more about their social status, then that's not an influence that I'd want to have in my life. But this is just personal opinion.

@Leo Gura How long did it take you to get your first 10,000 subscribers on Youtube? Was your growth slow at first, or were you able to raise your numbers at a quick pace from the start?

That makes a lot of sense. I think this is probably why adults are seldom in touch with this "stream of wisdom" as much as a child is. A child hasn't fully developed a coherent world-view and has an openness to experience so they haven't labeled things dualistically yet. So, life isn't about following ego rules yet, and thus they are more in touch with intuition.

Discovering this was really one of the most amazing things about the experiences that I had. It was like I was in touch with everything that there was to know... but it was also utilitarian in that it only really gave me what I needed in that moment. But it was very clear that there was a connection to all the wisdom that I needed to know as a human being and that I had always had this connection and always known it. So, it was amazing to discover this but I also knew that it had always been there. The only reason why I think this is so hidden (although I don't know) is because this enables that which is infinite oneness and perfection to experience finite-ness, separation, and imperfection. But this is just a guess really.

@Kevin Dunlop Thank you for watching and posting my video. Just a disclaimer, it was my first one so the production quality is very shoddy.

I really don't want to hi-jack the thread anymore. Can you PM with other messages, if you want to talk? I feel guilty diverting the thread. I don't like to break rules that much. But I understand that I can't help you. If you're past where I'm at (which I take your word for) there is unlikely to be something that I can provide to you beyond accidental serendipity which can provided by anyone and anything. I do feel a bit slighted by your rudeness though, and you can't really blame a person operating under the ego-consciousness paradigm for being slighted. I think I understand what you're doing. After I had my experiences, I realized that I was constantly trying to manipulate people's opinion of me and make myself likable and doing a ton of subtle social games that I was barely conscious of. So, after realizing this, I decided that I would do whatever came to my mind regardless of how negative of a light it cast me in. I did and said just about anything that wouldn't get me kicked out of school or thrown in jail. But I ultimately came to the conclusion that this radical unfiltered thought sharing and reputation destruction didn't really yield me anything of value. But I may have let it go pre-maturely. I have never much been able to stomach other people thinking negatively of me as I'm very attached to my "I'm a good person" identity.

I'm definitely a hypocrite. I give great advice but very seldom follow it. I have a lot of blind spots but it's a work in progress.

Fair enough. But I still don't understand what you derive from doing things the way you do. It does seem to be a waste of time for you, if you're really past trying to build up a superior ego with the realization of the illusion of separation. From my point of view, it seems like you're having a bunch of arguments with yourself. But what the heck do I know? Anyway, I'm supposed to be ignoring you... so fare thee well.

Why did you post my video?

At least it's a polite ego that doesn't spend hours a day hi-jacking forum threads and throwing random polemic arguments at people. I certainly am identified with ego though. I've never claimed otherwise. I know by contrast with my past experiences that I'm not enlightened. But if you really want to continue this swashbuckling match, feel free to PM me. Otherwise, don't waste my time and respectfully refrain from hi-jacking other people's threads.

I thought we agreed not to exchange words because it's a waste of time and energy. I've got nothing to share with you that you don't already know. I've been keeping my end of the agreement. But you may want to reread my comment in context as I wasn't actually talking about the third eye. I was commenting on what I believed the original comment was referring to.

I don't think he was referring to the third eye. In one of Leo's videos, he talked about us having this deeply ingrained but false idea that there is a "self" located behind the eyes or inside of the head. I've experienced this illusion too. So, the inquiry process recommends looking for a "self" there so that it can be noticed that there is no point there that could be labeled a "self."

It sounds like you're on the right track with your self-inquiry practice. The issue may be that you're used to 'knowing' how to do self-inquiry and that the process has become automatic. Also, if you hit a brick wall and get silence from your mind, this is what's supposed to happen. A really good litmus test for how effective a practice is, is if it brings you to a place where your mind can't make sense of anything. So, it sounds like you're on track but have gotten used to the process and your understanding of what "should" be happening. Continue with the process, but try approaching it with fresh eyes by getting in touch with what you expect to happen if you were being "successful" with your self-inquiry, then empty your cup of those expectations. The thing that's telling you "it's not working right." is the mind and thoughts which are not you and don't originate for you. It is trying to throw you off track, by discouraging you. It's how the "ego" preserves itself.

Look into Yin qualities. This will give you a much wider and deeper definition of femininity than our social caricature of femininity. Our social idea of femininity which is really two dimensional has more to do with how a man views femininity in a woman when looking for a mate, and not how a woman experiences her own femininity. If you want to highlight your femininity to be attractive to men, there are many resources to look into for that. Make-up tutorials and how to act like a feminine woman are great search terms for this. But the experience of femininity is so much more than about sexual attractiveness. It's about being, receptivity, natural cycles, mystery, the unconscious, the a-rational, darkness, emotions, the instinctual nature, the present moment, beauty, respect for the Earth and its creatures, unconditional love, non-heirarchical thinking, stillness, cooperation, and many other things that aren't quite celebrated in our society or even recognized as feminine. These are the things that must come up in power in order for us to solve most of our world's big problems. The masculine counterparts to these (respectively) are doing, communication, goals, clarity, the conscious, the rational, light, thought, the conditioned nature, the past and future, utility, prioritizing society and economy, conditional admiration, hierarchical thinking, movement, and competition. These can be wonderful qualities, but our culture is quite obsessed with them. So, most everyone in our society values these traits more and prioritizes them over their feminine counterparts. Boys and girls are conditioned from a young age to develop their masculine side, but are often unaware of or neglectful of developing their feminine side. But this imbalance is what causes a lot of problems on the global scale. Having said this, human beings are highly androgynous creatures. No one has only masculine or only feminine traits. All people contain a unique ratio of these traits. So, there are men who are more feminine than masculine and women who are more masculine than feminine. So, be sure to be authentic. Don't read the traits and try to fit into only the feminine mold because femininity and masculinity are pre-conditioned states. You can't really change your orientation that much. But you can choose to highlight the femininity that's already there. So, my recommendation is to read through my list of feminine qualities and find the ones that you genuinely embody, then find ways to develop and highlight those traits further.

Thank you! I was really interested in Lucid Dreaming about 12 years ago. I read a book about it and practiced a bit at some of the techniques, and was successful at have a good handful of lucid dreams. I still occasionally have them, maybe once every couple months. So, it's in my realm of experience and I do find it interesting, so I'll cover some videos on the topic in the future, but it isn't my main focus. It's similar to how OBE is for me. I've been getting them for about 14 years, so I have a bunch of experience with it... but I'm by no means an expert. I still have trouble with it sometimes. So, I put it in my videos because I know that a lot of people are interested in having an OBE and it's definitely enriched my life. That said, it's also not my primary focus right now.

The higher self and lower self is a false dichotomy because all is one. However, it is a great metaphor. The lower self is the ego self that you think you are right now. The higher self is what you are existentially. It is the self that you realize that you've always been when you are enlightened which already knows everything that you need to know as a human being. It is infinite. You live in tune with the higher self, when you see through the illusion of the separate self an no longer need to obscure and block out parts of reality to protect this false self. So, the higher self is already what you are, just remove the illusions created by the ego and it is what you are. When fear of harm to the self dissipates, clarity is what's left. The lower self isn't even an entity... it's just the illusion that you aren't already the higher self.