Jackthelad

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About Jackthelad

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  • Birthday 03/13/1984

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    Ireland
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    Male
  1. @Adilbek There is something about focusing on something like that that. I'm a believer now. I am going to choose another goal, perhaps another tangible one like a prize or definite outcome. Then I think it's attacking it from a series of angles, visualising morning and in bed at night. I was not drinking for 6 weeks so it gave me an unbroken chain of days to focus on it. Maybe it's just that singular focus that people talk about. the other thing I think is important is working as hard as you can on it, to take it out of the real of wishful thinking. Like you did by sending feelers out, not resting out your laurels but actively participating and getting it back. to me, that intuitively feels like it has to be part of it.
  2. It's interesting you mention that, because I am curious ablut exploring some of these topics, making it accessible to an average crowd member could be challenging. One thing i hope i can do in time is take humour and stand up and build a real high order purpose through it, at the moment I'm learning and surviving and i don't have skill nor interest to explore outside that. I am really excited about comedy though and want to give everything for at least the next 12 months to see where i go with it.
  3. So, I decided to post here for the first time in probably 2+ years. I used to be more interested in self growth and personal development, and bought Leo's course to find my life purpose. I got hopelessly mired in the Life Purpose course and sort of drifted from spirituality, and all that stuff. Anyway, I recently begun doing stand up comedy, and it has felt like my Life Purpose since starting (although amazingly I didn't mention it or performing at all in my life purpose exercises, it just never occured to me even though it's so obvious now!!!) and almost a year to the day I did my first Open Mic, I won a comedy competition. I applied quite a bit of systematic visualisation towards winning, where I would close my eyes and state my goal (to Win this comp) and I would hear my name being called out as winner in a myriad of ways, or just my set going great, or see all the hard work up to it. Or all three. Then I would affirm this using positive affirmations ("I am a winner, I rise to the occasion, I love performing" or any variety of the sort. I also made a Vision Board for my Comedy, and put the poster for the final with my name as the winner typed out about it and some quotes as if from a news paper article underneath it. I also wrote out my name as winner of the best act and stuck it in my wallet and looked at it whenever I remembered. So to sum up: 1. For two weeks (roughly) before final, I visioned for around 10 mins upon waking up, and again in bed before going to sleep - using a 4 point system: say the goal, visualise the outcome, affirm to myself, and then affirm that this will manifest for me or something better will happen for the good of all concerned. (taken from a book on Leo's list) 2. I had my Vision Board on OneNote with some positive images, I looked at it sometimes. I also wrote out a winner speech type thing (basically just affirmations as a thank you speech). 3. I wrote an unsent email to a person stating I had already won the comp. 4. I had my goal on a queue card and also affirmations in my wallet which I read here and there over the two weeks. 5. I kept working and gigging as much as I could, and kept writing and rewriting my set up to the final minutes before the show. So, when it came to the day of the comp I was really sick with a headcold! I almost made excuses as I had put in a lot of work as mentioned above but thankfully I had bought the Magic of Thinking Big which had a perfect paragraph on not making excuses, and I put aside my ill feelings, did my set, did well. When my name was called as winner the MC said it wasn't even close and I had won the crowd vote and judges vote. I felt weak in the knees because I knew the two people who went after me had very strong sets and got a great crowd reaction. It was a real surreal moment for me, I felt like I had taken drugs, because the sense of mystery of the LOA process really stuck me, and there was like 100+ people looking at me on stage all weird. I imagined it and it all came true, the images were different because the room I didn't know, but everything else, a bit surreal. I felt like I had almost cheated the system, like I won by such a margin while sick and with stiff competition. So what am I asking? Well, the cynic in anyone would say you just focused your mind on it so much and worked hard and it had to go to someone and you were victorious. Then they would put this into a probability, say a 1 in 8 chance or because I tried so hard, maybe a 1 in 6 or something, So really, totally and absolutely the nature of luck as it occurs naturally in life. But I really visualised the name and hearing my name being called it, it definitely felt like something interesting was at work, like I had helped to shape this using my thoughts. I felt like my thought have this extraordinary power, and how I could use this in the future... it really unsettled me really! Ok here is an issue. I did do this with as much faith and confidence as I could, but there was no conviction in me that victory was ABSOLUTE, I still was hearing in my head other people's names being called out as winners, but I didn't put much stock on that, as the book said that happens and not to give it energy. When the winner was about to be called ,I was sure the last guy had been far better than me. Anyway, I'm hugely excited about this potential, but just wondering if anyone has any similar experiences. If @Leo Gura found this question/ topic interesting I'd love to hear his perspective. I watched the LOA video on actualised ages ago but haven't seen it in a while and it was recorded years ago so maybe his views have changed. I'm now a real believer in Visualisation/ LOA but I don't know how to go about harnessing it properly, or what my next goal should be. I feel like if I had a second goal I was working on at the same time, it would have been less effective, but that's just me. Anyway, I'd love to hear anyone's thoughts on this. I haven't written this as clearly or patiently as I could have, as it's 4am and I'm dying sick with a headcold and just groggy. So I am sorry for the messy nature of this post!
  4. Thanks for the pdf link!
  5. @Nahm I somewhat disagree. Most comedians who make careers of it start in their teens or early 20's, but there are plenty of examples of people doing well starting in their 30's and beyond. The trick would be to expedite the process. The great thing is you have experience/ perspective to draw from, which can shortcut the process somewhat. EDIT: I do understand what you mean by 33 being young, relatively speaking. EDIT2: I have seen some of the roasts. Most of them aren't professional comedians I don't think
  6. I think this is a big issue for people. Perhaps you need inspiration. Google a list of late bloomers or people who started something later in life. Also the book "100 ways to motivate yourself" is a great listen that can fire you up - there's a part about Anthony Burgess starting to write later in life. He wrote 80 books or so. You also have to be honest with yourself and some things will not be possible after a certain age e.g. wanting to become an Olympic swimmer in your 30s. There's no real way around this except for acceptance. But a lot of things will remain possible most/all of your life. Edit: I'm starting to do standup comedy at 33 (34 next month). It's very hard to be successful at this age, if I decide to do it for a career, but there are examples of people making it later in life. Comedy is not something you need to start at 18 to become world class at, but all the time helps of course.
  7. Thanks for your reply. You make some good points!
  8. Hey thanks for the reply this was quite helpful!
  9. It's really some new venture which I'm excited about. Perhaps comedy writing might be perfect, or something similar or with a theme. I wonder if I have more life experience now to draw from and that might give me some more clarity on LP. My perspective was always "I'd love to be that type of guy" but I don't think it was any more meaningful than looking at a singer and wishing I was a famous/ successful musician. It's not a burning dream I've had for years... but I think it might fit with my strengths and values. It certainly never seemed a reality for me as I assumed my personality was too fragile for it. Honestly, a lot of my growth in the last 2 years has made it a possibility for me. I wouldn't discount comedy for you if humour and playfulness is your top strength, I mean it could be connected somehow. I'm sure comedy and authentic connection can be mixed together.
  10. Going to keep this as simple as I can. Have recently started doing some stand up. I really love it, and think it has potential to be a life purpose for me. I've done the life purpose course before but got stuck around the zone of genius part and never finished it. I am going through it again. When I did do it though, laughter and humour came up in my strengths and values top 3. I do remember thinking "I wonder if comedy could be a vocation" but assumed I am the wrong type for it. But it was probably the only thing that poped out as being in both of those and therefore likely to be a candidate for LP. Anyway, now that I've started into it, I see just how much ego is involved in comedy, and how damaged a lot of the people in it are. I am not awoken or anything like that, but I am pursuining consciouness work and working my way through Leo's book list as well. So one question is, does anyone know what the consequences of becoming enlightened or more awoken might be on a career in comedy, and as well, should you pursue a passion which has a lot of damaged/ broken/ bitter people involved? Who also tend to have desperately unhealthy lifestyles, for the most part, along with a lot of psychological issues, the kind of stuff Leo would cover every week I have become really fascinated with jokes and the art of comedy and it's really consuming me, so I feel it close to my purpose or at least it matches the things I am interested in, my strengths, values, etc. I think lettiong go of my ego would allow me to be free to express myself without getting damaged through the lack of acceptance, bombing, etc that all comics seem to go through. But if I lost my ego would I think the whole thing was stupid or reductive?
  11. Hey, I have had tinnitus for like 7 years now. I found it hard at first, but eventually came to accept it. For me, it comes in waves, I have one tinnitus that is always there, mainly in my left ear, and the last few years I've noticed a strange hum that comes and goes (in my perception at least) that is worse. Long story. Everytime I get stressed about it, I always remind myself that I eventually stop focusing on it. I also try to look at it as a strange ally, rather than an enemy. Like I'll tell myself that the sounds make me a better person. Not sure if it's true but what always works for me is just reminding myself that it does recede from your perception. I would also generally try to avoid googling it or looking for cures, it's a lot easier to just accept it and then forget about it.
  12. Buddy that is fantastic to hear! Thank you for posting this and finding the link online. I really hope it can help you on your mission and journey; I'll return to it myself over the following weeks and months, finish my notes on it and we can have a good discussion about it. Got about 25 % through it - making notes - before I got distracted, which is always my biggest issue.
  13. Hygiene means being clean, washing regularly. My girlfriend often has stubble under her arms and other places and it doesn't bother me at all. I think we are talking about different things. I began talking about hygiene without realising she asked about shaving/ grooming more specifically (i.e., I thought she was asking about hygiene and general things like that)
  14. Dude you gotta get rid of this girl ASAP. No good can come from this. You can have amazing sex with a girl who doesn't cause you this much suffering. Forget about any rationalising, end this right now. I dated a girl who sounds very like her two years ago; sex was amazing, everything else was horrible. She punched me in the head when she was drunk, I also treated her badly to be fair. At the time I convinced myself with so much nonsense. Your girl may have a personality disorder, I suspect the girl I was seeing suffered with a Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). It's not as rare as you might think (2% for BPD alone or something). Check it out and some ones like it. http://psychcentral.com/disorders/borderline-personality-disorder-symptoms/ But aside from diagnosing her like I did with my ex (which may not be accurate anyway), just stop seeing her. How likely is it that things will change, even if you are just having crazy wild sex? My suspicion is that you are still emotionally invested in this girl, and you will suffer because of this. I know, it's bloody easy for me to sit here and say all this to you. But I know it's the right advice. My new girlfriend is better looking, amazingly kind, fun, passionate, and we have even wilder, better, deeper sex than I ever did with my ex. It's on another level. But I couldn't be told that at the time and I suffered immeasurably for it. PM me if you want to talk more about this. I'm not being forceful or anything, I just know there's a better way.
  15. My personal take is that when people have amazing chemistry it can and should happen the first night if that is what they both really want, but it's just more likely to happen after the 2nd or 3rd time generally (as a woman likes to feel safe and comfortable to trust the guy enough, in my experience). I personally have felt flattered a girl had enough comfort with me to hook up early, or I choose to interpret it as connection or chemistry. We are all sexual beings; I don't understand why women get shamed for this. For me, women often hold back because they think it makes them seen as "this or that", but I don't see it that way at all. If a woman is sexy, kind, fun and I really like her, I never think about how long it takes. However, perhaps counter-intuitively, I have been taken aback when a girl tells me she hooked up with a guy before on the first night if it took us a while longer. I mean, it could be completely out of her control (time of the month; previous bad experience) but contrary to other people, I found it less flattering when a woman waited to prove her whatever, if she went for it before with other people, even if she says it's because she liked me a lot. Again, it's in the interpretation. I know, other guys may see this as odd. I believe in the nature of the moment and if I hear a girl sleeps with a guy soon I almost always assume the two had chemistry/ a connection/ something else good in that moment. When someone waited a few dates, I often thought to myself "I must have not made her feel safe enough with me" even if that's not correct in the context or whatever her actual reason might be. There is some truth to waiting making the experience better and deeper, but I find I am happy for it to happen when the mood is right, even if that's only an hour after kissing for the first time, or whatever. So you can probably guess my view on hooking up and acting crazy the first night. I think it's great! As for hygiene, well this is a definite deal breaker for me, and I mean this from both sides. If someone doesn't care enough to have a basic level of hygiene and all that, it's a no go for me, always. No exceptions. I would expect a girl to be the same towards a guy regarding this.