ValiantSalvatore

@hyruga Dude man I had no idea how to express myself I wrote fking volumes of journals handwritten. It flows naturally if you can put in an hour and do some sort of practice I did shadow work and just sheer self-expression in my journals it works sort of digesting my nervous energy through writing. If you live in a larger city you could do toasmasters and prepare some sort of presentation and present it untill you are satisfied with the result of the presentation. For me journaling helped with self-expression especially internally expressing myself than externally and finding words for my internal stirrings. It's way better then it used to be people legit enjoy listening to me now. Which is good. It's a craft.

@Leo Gura Leo I hate this dating thing.

She replied now I don't know whish me luck for the date positively. I'll contact her in a couple of min.

@Leo Gura Thanks I thought about suggestings drinks and offered coffee now, she was just not interested after the first message I presume. I am chatting right now from a date that does not show up online. I am texting other girls. She declined told me she has no time, so basically I messed up attraction. Also, thanks for emotional support she was quite hot. I knew the number meant nothing and I was pissed at my friend and me having to do all the work as usual because of casual trash. Even if he get's more girls online. I don't know I delete all the fake women now from my online profiles I am tired of this attention seeking back and forth shit. ------- I even did subconsciously because I asked her if she is from this area. So, she was not disinclined for dancing etc. I was just pissed that I have to constantly deal with this insane paradoxes and nobody really is there and my friend complaining about music and me having to dance with an injury my friend completely dismissing that it affects me. The point is also I am more of a magician I knew she was a student I knew she lived her I knew she was busy I knew she wanted to go out and have fun, yet I just did not engage in a fun activity with her on the spot, this is what I mean with I am tired of this city to constantly do all of this stuff alone feels like I am a maniac. Also just not very good wingmanship....

@hyruga This might be a weird unstructural thing to do, yet practice talking to yourself. For instance I tend to explain to myself everything and there is no real time to think about what you say when you do that. Or just writting endless gibberish having to make sense is not the point you can sort of rely on intuition and just write or speak. Without having the need to be logical and make sense. Who cares? You can also have fun especially when you are alone infront of the computer or smth. similar. For instance I read about a concept and I talk about what I intuit is and is not correct and it sort of balances it out. When talking casually you can also ask questions or find the things that connects. Instead of getting lost in it all. Also massive journaling does help self-expression from a survival non-contemplative level of experience. Also, letting go of perfection there is only virtue.

@Thought Art I go through the notes when I am stuck on something. As well as I re-define my values as I feel relevant at best currently every 3 months, so I create meaning and it helps with changing behaviour and activities and getting a kick out of that. Once a year I set yearly goals I've read all the books now I feel I am just now getting started. Depending on how useful the content right now is in my life I review notes or watch a video. I feel new input from other sources is also very valuable.

@hyruga Yeah, I saw one test vice-versa with a guy that is a jacked famous model making a picture with a dog. Receiving 40-50+ likes in a couple of hours. On which plattform did you create the account? OkCupid is working match wise I had like 4-7 matches this week. Bumble is a bit more difficult. I did not know that they use an elo system for rating your account based on fundamentally how selectively you choose and get chosen. More matches higher elo rating the less matches and the more right swipes without matches the lower your elo score. So, pictures are really important. I at least received one intro so far and I get liked 2-3 times a week, yet my messages get the most results apparently. So I recive 4-7 matches a week on one plattform and Bumble one peer week currently. That is 5-8 girls per week in a 100k city which is good I feel. I'll find a way to get the pictures to work and "automate" this stuff. Setup two dates now finally. Ideally two more like one.

I wanted to ask what kind of pictures worked for you the most? Pictures including social proof for example hanging-out with friends as well as doing your hobby for instance playing the piano, violine or skateboarding etc. As more hobbies are more down-to-earth reading,meditating,cycling,hiking as well as coding/engineering etc. I do have some issues with pictures currently and their setting. My question is what kind of pictures helped you attracting women online personally? I make a list of pictures ideas to get creative gears churning. Cycling Playing chess Reading Travelling exotic place Travelling adventeruous place Travelling modern city Picture in nature, a park, forest etc. Pictures with friends hiking, cycling, travelling together Snowboarding Coding Playing the guitare,piano etc. Simply professional pictures taken by a photographer Exercising Deadlifts Squats Specific exercises Happy with friends exercising, partying, clubbing, sitting at a table talking Clubbing pictures Halloween pictures In a bar with friends Pictures with women/female friends eating, talking, having fun Meditating Yoga Working on your business or craft Sculpturing Wood work Drawing Showing an impressive feat Juggling Boxing Judo Martials arts Pictures with interests as shirt for example superman shirt, favorite rock band, artist etc. Pictures with a celebrity Doing push-ups Calisthentics Humerous pictures walking out of a bank with a wheelbarrow full of fake money (looks like robbed a bank), dressed as santa claus standing on a roof etc. Dancing Even just studying Drinking tea Playing golf Beign very muscular Doing pull ups Wearing glasses Glasses on/off Accessories on/off Shirt or T-shirt Pictures in a suit Any assertive confidence displaying poses? Pictures infront of sports car Pictures at a festival Pictures at a tech meeting cebit in Germany for example Certain colors even did a red shirt stand out etc. Picture with CEO of a company or start up Pictures at the beach I think this is enough I am curious to what worked for you I am not interested into faking interests as I am looking still for ideas for picture besides taking a vacation and using travel pictures soonish if that is even possible right now lol. Also cool if you can provide some examples. Till now the professional taken pictures worked the best for me. TLDR; What kind of pictures worked for you for online dating? Yes I make everything to a science.

@SamC Nothing that really worked fully for me as an idea I tried scheduling activties that I want to do in my free time. This does still work mostly although I am not 100% consistent in that sort of scheduling. Yet, I find unplanned free time can be an hinderance since there is so much stuff I like it's not easy to find an activity that I really want to do. I wish I would have done that earlier. As much play as possible as I feel this is essential to re-charge creative batteries. For striking balance nothing really worked for me this is where I have an issue as I can be obsessive about stuff. TLDR; Bullet journal Schedule free time where free time is available Execute

@Null Simplex That is quite funny lmao. Thanks for the info!

@StarStruck I'll add another perspective instead of calling it "dick" it's being playful and cocky&funny or charming at least that is how it works out for me. I made all of my dates laugh, yet the connection part is missing. They told me that I am exciting which is the opposite of boring. It's important to lead with fun and engage in fun things as well as find fun activities. It's about fun and confidence!!!! If she has no amount of confidence that is a different issue. I am not familiar with push and pull. As I do feel there are some crazy aspects to it. I prepared some games even mental games that are engaging and just fun and are about exploration and adventure as well as mental stimulation. You don't even need to take it to a spiritual level. As many will not be ready for that if you have or have had a strong spiritual practice, yet you can lead there are practices I know I can't practice alone for engaging in depth more. Yet, it's not easy to do this without a partner. Which would build a strong connection etc. Even if the person has depth. I do think this is an leadership issue. I can't currently gain more experience as there are not many people here. My last date, I wanted to build a deeper connection through eye contact, yet she really was unable to look me into the eyes and hold and match a level of depth. Yet, I could have built it through physical escalation. Would love to give better advice, yet I really do not have an issue with boring for me it's vice-versa. I have to take care that the women I am dating is not boring me. Might seeing it that way shifts the perception of the issue into the right perspective of being confident and fun to be around. You are the one who is supposed to have fun and take her by the hand and be playful and leading. Not being nice and putting her on a pedstal I've been there...maybe still am. I'd say cocky and funny is good as long as it does not become to juvenile and it's about fun and intensity, integrity and confidence. Being a "dick" in that way is a more healthier approach than straight up being an ass etc.

There is one fundamental issue with Vispassana meditation. It fosters shadow material\spiritual bypassing. @Sine You keep detaching and detaching from sensations depending which kind of Vispassana you are doing. I asked about this issue on a forum and can link a forum post of a women who has 38 years of experience etc. Explaining some of the connections. There are also other opinions. I also don't like to constantly experience the ego-identification process of my body. I also never truely went beyond the body-mind problem. I found this interesting article http://www.kenwilber.com/blog/show/309 Unsure if it helps I really wanted to resolve this issue while doing psychedelics I had more shadow level kind of experiences and it basically forced me to experience it all. In order to even get the feeling of having let go of the body-mind problem. I am not talking about Mahasamadhi that is absolutly to much. TLDR; The article get's into some depth and describes the corelate of what happens with a full Integration of emotions e.g fear, pride, anger at a spiritual level.

I don't think using this tip is all to good if you don't have a high match rate. Apparently the algorithm pushes people with less matches and less messages down and they are not shown as often. So, don't use this "hack" when you don't already receive a lot of matches. My match rate has gone down unsure if this is the reason. Apparently this is how bumble works according to my couple of bits of research.

I just discovered this trick in case nobody knows as well as if this is already known just hold your horses. I want to share it. Basically all it is you can extend the amount of people you like on a given day by using the webbrowser. I tested this now you can use all your fremium likes and then hop on to the webbrowser version of Bumble and like more people also it apparently refreshes more often than on the phone when I use Bumble. TLDR; More likes through using Webbrowser First like all via phone then hop on the webpage from Bumble Like through webpage version of Bumble Wait some time Send out likes via webpage again Thought this is a nice little tip this works for me. Somehow the likes you can send out on the webpage refreshes more often.

@Null Simplex That is an interesting profile. Just from analyzing and seeing the pictures shortly I can see why men like it and don't like it. I messaged a lot of women and "ball busted" IIRC this is the concept them for profiles without pictures of them. I received a lot of likes back. Presuming the profile was without gender I'd also presume that it could be a hot women who does not even need a profile picture etc. What gender did you use for the account that would be interesting. @Preety_India Yes, definitely I'll do it when the opportunity arises. I skimmed an e-book where there are profile tips and examples where a cool picture where the guy does not look into the camera is a must according to this e-book. One with cinos and white sneakers and looking like the dude above would be ideal. Next shooting because it was kinda fun I'll do a pose like this!

@Preety_India Danke dir für dein Beileid.

Ich liebe rote/orange Katzen meine Katze ist vor ein paar Monaten gestorben und hieß Simba und war rot. Viel Erfolg und Spaß beim Deutsch lernen!

@HypnoticMagician I feel the opposite it would gain more. If you really want to play advocatus diaboli play it with a bit more mindfulness. I love criticism, yet what you wrote is sheer stupidity and myopia. I am better off doing the stuff instead of receiving that kind of feedback. What you are saying stuff that happend in my life would basically drive you to suicide for me you are just some rando online. I don't think commenting me is going to work for you. Just stop it. Writting j.k like a 12 y.o apologizing for brat like behaviour using this nasty kind of fantasy language. I don't know just give others feedback who are worse off than me. Your opinion to me is as close to worthless as it gets. The amount of assumptions you make is horrible. Go troll someone else. I care about results and not about your philosophy of things. What kind of feedback is this? The way you type almost tells me everything about you. So, just go through your transformation. Talking about assumptions.

@HypnoticMagician I think you received your fair portion of Hitlery in life. I am unsure how to reply to this level of toxcitity I am pretty sure you'll get banned also. Here a reply. Basically everything you type would be negated by dating coaches. Plastic surgery won't help anyones self-image very much without an internal change. Also, I don't ponder sex all the time that is an assumption based on your perception not mine. Also, I am not interested to keeping women around like a dog. There are way more important things to do. Going through data online even from one dating coach I am doing pretty good. Also your comments are highly misogynistic. If you have success that way great. Yet I highly doubt you'd keep a "women around" for some time. I was wondering but I figured it out. It's A Okay just please get banned you are perfect fuel. Maybe buy a dog instead of a cat or even dating.

What works as a humorous silly pic? Dressed up in a silly way. Making weird faces. Using girl clothes dressed as a women etc. or very feminine. making fun of gender roles/gender as a social construct. Silly pose? Twisted like a bretzel upside down hanging from a tree Using make up to look like an animal cat,dog, vulture, tortoise, turtle Not very good with this one yet, if you have any ideas relating to humerous pictures I'd appreciate it. I'll see if one of my friends and I can channel our inner goofball. Did some pictures "doing" sporty activity they are rather weak currently. IMO. I will see what works we took some yesterday outside after doing dips/cardio/pull-ups. I did them after a dip pose at the calisthenics stuff. I'll post if I find something that works. What worked was photofeeler wise using a grey filter sometimes.

@Fearless_Bum Through travelling and living at least in a couple of different cities I have a similar pattern of disinterest for low quality activities in terms of how "conscious" they are. You can just be excited about creating the life you desire and you automatically will just be interested in the sheer experience of whatever is happening. Some dude getting drunk, some idiotic conversation about a tv series etc. you can just pay attention and enjoy the process you can even meditate and totally space out and people will not really notice. There is almost everytime something fascinating about another person and you can share stuff about yourself also. It's important to reach out friends usually cost time and energy and many are lazy and not interested in planning/doing stuff if you don't have the exact same interests. Expanding your interests can also help. I sometimes feel like I am a boring asshole because I feel I don't know enough or very niche stuff like SD, Integral Theory, Politics is also not a very good conversational topic. Nutrition, health, science, entrepreneurship as well as personal development are all great topics to learn about depending on interest. Expanding your interests will also make you more available to people. I do have a good amount of friends just hanging-out and talking about day to day experiences and sharing parts of that even if we have a totally different background can work. It's often more a lack of effort to wanting to connect to others and then beign more inclined to be needy because you want that friendship/connection thing etc. That sort of is my humble opinion. Also if you are not interested in the other person that is totally fine!

@petar8p The point is if I feel it I feel very dominant and I don't care about other people anymore so I am unsure what to do I generally have high self-esteem. The point is I really do not want to hurt others as I genuienly feel that I can provide higher value. I am doing a course on who to refine this so I am refining I am really looking more for ideas instead of toolkits to add to my belt since I already have a toolkitbelt full of tools. I reduce them currently to what works. The point is I visualize 30 mins everyday parts of attracting and feeling like I have it I do a visualization where I feel worthy capeable of having more value. Now I often answer my own questions...... very often. In case you have ideas I'd really like to know or even challenges like looking at every girl you see in public in the eyes till she stops looking etc.

I am sort of getting more into this game stuff I bought the course from Tyler, yet I notice because of my LP it's not easy to find time for it and it's more of a longterm project now as I can study the theory more etc. I notice my inner game is lacking more then I originally thought. I currently have the issue that I am lower on status than most girls on dating apps. Which does not make me feel very confident I overcame a lot of insecurities in my past through shadow work etc. I approached the first girl on Saturday she told me she has I boyfriend I simply asked if she was interested in dancing. The point is how can I display status in my profile I've been talking to my friend who get's consistently laid through online dating and even though I haver a higher earning potential he just has status because he is becoming a teacher and studies at a better university. The point is I consistently match with people higher in status, yet find it hard to attract and get the more normal people who can't see beyond status to be at least attracted to me. I attract basically the people I "loath" which are the lazy and apathy oriented people. I usually do more then required even though I am lazy this has been a consistent trend in my life even though I might do not get the best results because of a lack of effort. This is sort of a conundrum I am consistently working with. As I have spurts in ingenuity often through beign lazy and taking my time usually my brain runs to fast to keep track of stuff properly. Here is a list of what is currently happening online as my day/night game will slowly happen as other projects are just more important. As well as I want to finish my online dating challenge I attract people who are between the ages of 21-31. Most have higher status chemical engineer, doctors of medicine, people who are younger and doing their graduate programms. Did not meet a single person, yet that was lower in societal status even though I might have a higher earning potential. They act with more value because they have more value it's hard for me to not admit that and feel like I have more value consistently, spordaically yes. Otherwise I am unsure what I am doing wrong I used to write in my profile that I am doing online courses. 70-80% of my likes are from women I feel no attraction towards and I would never date them. (smoke,obese etc.) 10-20% I can date and we usually chat even if they are more succesful and I like it that they are mainly very compassionate, since I am highly attracted to compassion. The point is this sort of get's me very hard internally because deep down I want to provide, yet I am scared and this can be fuel as well as a huge hinderance for me to continue online dating. It does hurt my self-esteem although I like to put myself out there online and be authentic. The point is it's not easy for me to be authentic since I have an injury that needs an operation and it is really messing with my head/mindset and authenticity (not as much a couple of months ago). Any ideas how find a fundamental solution besides increasing my "status" (LP work) more authentically as I am already doing? I took at least two new photos of my hobbies showing interests (reading, cycling) and some status I guess. I still have an old picture where I lived in China with a couple of women from my workplace, yet it's 5-6 years old I am usually quite social when I am out although I am a strong introvert (INFJ 4w5). They all liked me so I thought it might be a good idea for social proof. Also this shows more of my personality as I really helped them there. We even ate lunch at their house/appartenet so I feel this would be fine as I would usually ask them in person. Because of rights etc.

@something_else I feel on OkCupid anything is possible you could easily match and date a girl who is 24-27 although I don't know in detail. I am 27 most of my matches have been 3-4 years younger and older some are the same age so anything 3-4 years+- as well as people the same age definitely works. It's way more open-minded and about personality and authenticty. Also having skimmed once with a womens profile the competition is high, yet they use low effort pictures etc. So, just having a good profile definitely helps a lot. It's more like a display of skill than status in a sense I feel. This is my biased opinion!

@something_else Not using Tinder yet I am managing my activities as well as possible I should not even have time for this, yet this really is an issue right now. My friend basically get's most of his matches through Bumble and Tinder. I can compare Bumble with okCupid so far. Simple answer (2 weeks Bumble 4 months approx okCupid) Bumble more attractive and succesful women I repeat way way way more attractive women Bumble more casual Bumble less personality because of shorter profile design choice Bumble is still a riddle to me with conversations/chatting Bumble has more chats features voice mail and video Bumble very Orange/green to Green/orange Bumble feels more chill although not having any bee's in your hive just feels frustrating which is okay not always, but good practice for acceptance Bumble pictures seem to count more OkCupid more authenticity more depth OkCupid quite left leaning with more hypocrites (very green) has some yellow people from a SD perspective OkCupid intellectual you can just have deeper conversations that lead to dates OkCupid more naivity and fake profiles OkCupid till now conversion rate for me is higher here OkCupid has more international students and international people OkCupid seems to care less about status Overall I feel the hurdle is higher in Bumble, yet I have to test more currently OkCupid I can send out messages and receive most matches through originality which is only possible in pictures with Bumble OkCupid less effort if don't want to use super pictures OkCupid can feel very superficial in comparrision to Bumble OkCupid is also weird you can track people more I feel one girl is now online again after some dates with one guy I feel like they can't find what they want on this page although a female friend of mine found her current bf and they are together for 4-5 years or so. Similar women overall in taste adventure and travel picks are like everything I see and miss in my profile Some wome use both services Bumble and OkCupid My friend overall get's more matches most on Tinder so I can't really tell currently I get one like per day on Bumble and approx 4-5 matches per week on okCupid. Depending on effort of messages, yet the pool is getting smaller. Newer accounts I get instantly. I wanted to test Tinder sort of as last solution for online dating. Although they recommend in the David DeAngelo course to have more profiles on more plattforms. I am just slowly refining my profile to see what works.