puporing

Why wait 5 frikingggg years if you can pull the trigger today . Go for it, life's too short to not be where you want to be. What's holding you back? Sounds like you've got plenty of experience already from it. If there's nothing holding you back (ie you are not constrained by earning a certain amount of money or something for example, even that's debatable..), go for it. Don't stay out of a sense of obligation (I know how easy people can guilt you into staying). Watch out for people ped-"stalling" you into staying because of how much they "appreciate you". Contemplate, if your "avatar" only has one more year to live, how would you make this decision? Follow your heart, trust your inner guidance.

Oh yaaaa hell it is! I can be very masculine or feminine depending on the situation. It does not "cancel" each other out, it's simply what feels right in each moment, who/what I am with, what am I doing, etc. The masculine energy is more protective, decisive, and assertive; the feminine energy is more soft and yielding, going with the flow, being more "vulnerable". I think it's very attractive and makes someone more multidimensional (ie more depth).

They amplify what's already there. Sometimes it's a more acute awareness of what's actually the truth of things if your mind is more pure and mostly devoid of delusions, in that case it reveals more of reality to you. But sometimes it's the amplification of what you perceive as reality but not entirely accurate.. and amplifies a "bias" we have maybe due to our past/conditioning. This is more like an area that requires "healing". (Sorta similar to how some people imagine entities for example.) What this shows is you may have an unconscious perception of reality that is "colored" by this paranoia and the trip is showing you this. For reality to be revealed accurately to you one has to "clean out the room" first (clearing personal biases, conditioning, ideas about how reality works..etc). I guess maybe the thing to dig is where you sense this may have come from? Have you been bullied/followed before? Do you feel unsafe in your environment or felt unsafe in the past?

@Eph75 I suggest following your heart, and seems like you could afford to in this case. There was a time when I was transitioning out of employment into self-employment, and I took a 2 month government job. Even though it was this good job on paper, I was pretty miserable and it was a longggg 2 months haha, coz I was just so done with it and wanted to start my own thing.

Sounds a bit unethical to me, should respect your boundaries for it, and you said it isn't the first time so that's huge red flags to me. Doesn't matter whether it's "proper" or not if you don't feel it is (and it is totally reasonable to not have this "conflict of interest" kind of set up), and how you feel matters a lot in that situation/relationship, you're paying them. Like yeah I wouldn't want my therapist to also be seeing say one of my parents lol. I would honestly try to wrap things up and move on.. lot of therapists are mainly driven by money and getting more clients.

@Blackhawk Desire can be this endless pit sometimes.. When you never had a gf or gone on a date, you wish you could just go on a date and hold someone's hand.. or have sex for the first time. But then you're not satisfied for having experienced all that once, twice.., now you want it to always be there. Why not simply love what arises as deeply as you can? And have the courage to let it go if it does decide to "leave you"... to love the fact that what this "other" wants is best for him/her/itself just like how you want to honor your life and your wishes and desires the same? It's ultimately the same coin, whether someone be with you or "leave" you, it's all for love.

Yes humor is often one of the most effective.

That's a very intense schedule! I'd almost treat it as like some kind of intensive training in that case.. but a year is still quite long. I'd take a slightly longer break somewhere in the middle at least to recharge, maybe go somewhere away from your family for that too, like a little retreat. Yeah eating well is super important and having a solid sleep schedule. Can always assess how you're doing as you go and adjust too.

Sense of agency (lack of). Disconnection from truth and love. Getting lost with "group think" (related to above).

Of course, and the resistance (and acceptance) such efforts receive... on and on.

And God is learning to accept all of itself...

Fine.. fine... empathy for Peterson too...

Maybe it's God's intention to evolve at its own pace ...

Ahahahah. I have alot of empathy and love for Elliot Page, glad someone was on their side. ?

@Yali Ok.. if I were you and literally nothing shifted then yeah that would be the two kinds of possibilities. I think there are test kits you can get but haven't done that myself..

@Yali There're also other possibilities... Maybe you got something else instead of 5-meo for example. But really don't know. Have you tried again at least?

Ughhhh.

Lot of therapists are similar I found out (through my own observation and observations from others), they rely on their clients to give them emotional (and financial) support and thus do not encourage ending the therapy relationship. Most will try to perpetuate this "gold standard" of seeing them once a week.. And I've heard that many will know they're dying but won't tell their clients because they're not ready to face it and wrap things up with these clients, and they have to find out from someone else that the therapist died lol. Just something to be aware of if you're pursuing this healing modality and its potential trap.

@Jodistrict It's a dilemma.. sometimes you just go with the flow and what the infinite intelligence "tells you" to do (which is you).. whether that's sharing or not sharing, in an online format or in-person format... whatever feels right, assess, re-assess. I'm kind of struggling with this myself right now... It's very challenging when the gap is large, but there's still a desire to share so find what works for you.

You can "construct" any high ideals you want but if people's level of consciousness isn't there it's not gonna work out that way and will always fall short and/or get corrupted. So the solution (permanent) is to raise level of consciousness.

@Kksd74628 yes things "merge" more and more with the "baseline" I've noticed.. that has been the latest "gift" I received..

Feels like it goes more than just the pooping part, you might have some anger to process as well that goes along with it, it's all part of self-love... first recognition of the child in you that wasn't loved enough, and then to see the higher perspective that the pain you got from your grandma was the same pain she got from somewhere else, then to dissolve this pain through self-love...

Just shared this to someone else but might apply here..

Yeah that can be a trap if one is not mindful of this dynamic becoming another form of "chasing". Best to be used mindfully.