Nahm

@Marinus Try to sum her up, in terms of the total experience, then contemplate what the opposite might be at your end of the experience which attracted you to her and her to you. For example, (not implying this example is relative to you) I have a friend who attracts females with repressed father figure “related” sensation, and his armor is thick like iron. He protects his inner child at all turns, and does not see why he can’t find mrs. right. Perhaps a good exercise would be to probe yourself with questions penetrating deeper and deeper into sensation regarding the divorce, and - apparent - using of you like a power tool. Perhaps they were not ‘using you’ in their own conscious experience, but rather unconsciously. A few good internalized questions could reveal why they would be unconscious, and therefore doing things unconsciously. Mrs Right probably lives nextdoor to you.

Via perception and thoughts you’ve created a perspective. Notice there is no actual “problem” to begin with. It’s a perspective you created. Can you create rather, with perception & sensation? The more nuts that sounds, the more it stands to be contemplated. Perhaps one can “See” a problem, in the sense Jesus could “See” a sickness.

Damn near absolute cleverness. Well done sir.

@Dimi ??

Notice the yin and yang (duality) are within a circle (nonduality), and the circle is also within the yin and within the yang (represented by the two smaller, often missed, circles) or, within all “things”. Notice anything one is most absolutely certain of, knows to be true beyond a doubt - is always discovered to have that pesky smaller circle, the opposite, the paradox, within it. I suggest it reveals the fundamental dualistic apparent nature of things, can never be pigeon holed as actually dualistic. What appears solid, done, created, is actually spontaneous and not two, creation/creating - there is no “done” to actually be found. There is no truth to be found, sans the Truth, bigger circle. The one which all duality appears within, the one which appears within all duality.

@ScorpiaMoon In my second attunement, a lotus seed sprouted out of my chest as it bloomed into a full flower. It appeared ‘more real’ in perception than ‘ordinary reality’, and hallucinations ‘in’ psychedelic trips. What did it mean? Nothing. How moving, inspiring & beautiful was it, very. It was like being touched by God, there was no thought, no subject-object relationship to it, and it defied consistent perception / consistent reality based assumptive thinking. It ‘revealed the underlying true nature of perception’ is “Magic”. All that appears predictable and calculable by means of two-ness is in actuality the creation of what is not logical & calculable, or two at all. So what is the meaning of inspiration, love, and beauty? The meaning is that direct experience is transcendent to meaning. Love is ‘itself’ meaningless, all meaning is within Love. Consider, if God wanted to give you a hug and sorta just say - hey, thanks - the mind might do a bit of formulation, contextualization, imagery. So I’d say your experience of Mary is not computable within the subject-object relationship, but one of transcendence. You might say, because it doesn’t mean anything, it’s means everything. How did it feel? Stop and consider your verbalization there. Was there a time when love and light were not so readily built in to your perception? You always offered love & light so easily, so selflessly - so me-thoughtlessly? Maybe this is so gradual, you haven’t stopped to notice. I notice. It’s awesome. Maybe thought and sensation are befriended, such that perception “itself” is affected. Try to give someone something you don’t have. See what I’m pointing at? Try to give yourself to someone, can’t, but, see what that points to? If you’re looking for some deeper existential explanation, it’ll still be found in a sense, between meaning (thought) and meaninginglessness (love)...but...a case could be made that Mary is the ultimate figure of Truth, which was, historically speaking, distorted. Perhaps her vision cut through some things for you, almost like a favor / hug from God, so to speak. You might also explore the sensations that arise around the possibility the implication is the revelation of immaculate conception, by which, in your direct experience, ‘you’ arrived, ‘here’. A “pointer” for you, weaved of your love, yet contextualized as it was received, as perhaps it’s just a bit outside the acceptance you are indeed unexplainable magic, the tendency to explain being itself the biggest pointer to this. As in, there is no logical explanation for why there are logical explanations in the first place, sans the love. Some would go so far as to say the implication of the second coming, is a pointer to none other than your apocalypse, of “your” delusion, that there is a subject-object relationship at all, in which “you” could have “delusion”. (The revealing of a revelation, an unveiling of the Truth of reality, possible only by the the revelation of the revealing - perhaps the ultimate “direct experience is king”) More simply, maybe Meta and rega lines are blurrable, Being blurred, which really never was not. In a way, we are the function that is the blurring. What ‘has happened’, and what ‘could happen’ is entirely contextual and self referential, inherently inclusive of causality and the reduction of the inexplicable to a facade of explanation. But direct experience, right now, is not. It is spontaneous, magical....”it” is this.....

I made a Letting Go; Poetry thread, which no serious person would ever contribute to. How bout a poem that’s all questions which congeal into the most important, most fundamental question?

@Marinus No need for hope, everyone ends up dead.

@Peo You mean you would lose ‘the gamer’? (Rather than the game) Self inquiry is not serious btw, it’s hysterical.

@Peo What would you actually lose in this analogy of the game? I get it, one player would win, the other would lose the game. Any actual loss though? Or would someone just be so convinced the game is real, so sucked into it, that they actually believe they lost something?

@Peo Lose what?

@Robby Contemplate questions about death, write down your insights, and contemplate why the question arose, repeat, until you strike the fear. Then do the same with fear. See how they are different & the same. See how you / your experiences connected them / birthed your concepts of them. Also name the sensations in the body, and the thought stories that are “fear” to you. Trips tend to reward non-trip inspections like that. Good luck man. This might be helpful.

Consider the opposite.

@SoonHei No.

There are many psychological diagnoses & treatment plans forged from the general misunderstanding of thought & sensation. Chronic misunderstanding of sensation fuels negative thinking. Positive thinking works & feels better, but is later realized to be taxing & unsatisfying. Then we learn to change our state which is highly useful, but is not long term applicable / sustainable. These efforts are a natural progression in emotional intelligence, but become realized to be fueling a rollercoaster of ups & downs. The desire to get off this rollercoaster becomes strong, but thought is still hijacking sensation, leading to conceptual fragmentation, multiple personas, circumstance manipulation, etc - all very taxing & very unsatisfying. Balance, as you mentioned, can be effective and appropriate relatively, but is also ultimately unsatisfying, as it is thought based. Another attempt to compensate for the misunderstanding of sensation. Motivation is repetitious state changing, and can be effective, but creativity is driven organically by inspiration. If we are to move up the emotional scale into effortless joy, inspiration, love and creativity for the duration, we must understand the critical role sensation has played since day one, and our misunderstanding of it. We must realize how we have been unconsciously creating emotion, to begin to consciously create emotion. Consider a paradigm shift to regain the guidance and inspiration of sensation: From: ‘thinking leads & sensation follows’ (unconscious emotion creation) To: ‘sensation leads & thinking follows’ (conscious emotion creation) May initially appear counterintuitive, but is actually the placing of intuition first, ime this is how you get off the creativity draining hamster wheel & emotional rollercoaster of ups & downs you described. Choices are the choosing of this or that thought. Quality of thoughts from which to choose from is largely determined by sensations. Thoughts are like finite balloons arising from infinite sensation. Deconstruct emotions by separating the sensation from the thoughts. Let the thoughts go, hone into / stay with the sensations. Understanding & clarity arises. There will likely be an unwinding period, in which thought strongly repetition / momentum attempts (so to speak) to instill the continuation of the hijacking. Don’t fall for it. Notice the effort all this is taking, is thoughts, and sensation is effortless.

@Aakash Thank you sir. ...maybe write a poem or two on the letting go; poetry thread...might sound nuts but it is highly effective.

What?! He’d realize he just left the only place with virgins! Now he’s gotta do the whole birth thing, yada yada...find virgins.

@Javfly33 Been to a suicide funeral yet?

@Aakash You are absolute infinity, but you still hold beliefs / identity, so when someone answers you in truth, it goes unrecognized because you are the authority, and the authority does not have direct experience to reference. But again, meditation is the way. Will that truth continue to go unrecognized? - For as long as you don’t have the direct experience, it will. Because one person insists upon logic. Why though? Why would someone do that? Get to the bottom of that, and you’ll have your answer. When you do, it will be the exact same nothing anyone else is already referring to, which you have yet to directly experience. You will. There are no odds. It is certain.

Sorry for cutting in but....the entire catalog, all of his work, all the videos are already that. When you deconstruct everything, do the work so to speak, what remains is nothing. (I don’t mean at all that you personally are not doing the work)

@Aakash Knowing Nothing is not the same as not knowing anything. Knowing Nothing is done via attunement / alignment...with sensations. It’s not accomplished by thinking / conceptualizing. Though, thinking & conceptualizing are tools which enhance themselves, so to speak, in the knowing of “anything”, or, lots of things. A classic ‘both’ scenario. The “juice” distinction is, sensations are Truth, listen to them. Thoughts are hollow in nature, we give them meaning by believing. A way to sum this up is Truth enters us by sensational guidance. Beliefs suppress sensations. Consider the difference (for now) between belief & truth....only one of them is true. How to sort belief & truth then....that sweetness is, you don’t have to. Sensations have always been doing this for you. Humility = Listening to sensations.

@Aakash I don’t know.

@SoonHei Perfect. ♥️